Valtteri Bottas spends a lot of time in Australia, though I suspect he’s presently on his way to the Chinese Grand Prix right now. His ute is still in Australia, though, and I’m getting behind the wheel this week. You know what that means—it’s time for a largely unofficial, totally ad-hoc Autopian meet-up!
Real talk, this isn’t going to be a big deal. On Wednesday, I’m literally going to show up in the Bottas ute to a car park in Melbourne. Bottas won’t be there, but you might come by as well. You’ll say “Oh, cool! Is that the Bottas ute?” and I’ll say “Sure is!” Then you can ask me about why I still haven’t sold my recalcitrant Mercedes and I’ll try not to cry. I’ll get into the time and place below.
But back to the ute. If you haven’t heard the story, Bottas did a hilarious advert for Uber CarShare. The basic schtick is that Uber bought a ute, threw on some silly “Aussie” gear, and put it on their car-sharing platform with Bottas as the drawcard. The bonus is that you can rent it for free while the promo is running. Why? “Because I am very rich already,” said Bottas.
Meat pie warmer? ✅ Budgie Smuggler clothes line? ✅ Kookaburra horn? ✅
Your first car could NEVER… So we made a second car that could. Purpose built for an Aussie road trip.@Uber_Australia #UberCarShare pic.twitter.com/2AkyvBYYUu
— Valtteri Bottas (@ValtteriBottas) March 20, 2024
Yes, this is a bare-assed marketing campaign that has only a tenuous connection to everyone’s favorite Finnish F1 driver (Kimi who?). That doesn’t mean I’m not going to have fun driving it. After all, it’s a 2012 Holden Commodore ute! It’s got 254 horsepower and 213 pound-feet of torque. I haven’t driven something that powerful since I got behind the wheel of the BMW M2 last year.
Anyway, Bottas is cool, and an honorary Australian. I’m Australian too, and a lover of most things Holden ever built. I grew up in the shadow of the plant, after all!
Where and When
I’m not heaps knowledgable about Melbourne so I had to do some research to find a good spot. I really wanted to meet up at the car park from Mad Max but I’ve sadly been informed that it’s closed due to rail works.
Instead, we’ll meet in the car park of Bunnings Port Melbourne at 7:00 PM on Wednesday. Link here. You’ll be able to spot the Bottas ute pretty easily by virtue of its brightly colored livery. There’ll be no hoonery or revving of engines or other nonsense, of course. Just a low-key meeting of a handful of car enthusiasts.
I actually have no idea how many Melbourne readers we have, so it might just be me! Regardless, it’s gonna be fun! I just need to coordinate my wardrobe to that eye-catching blue paint.
Image credits: Uber CarShare
Will try and bring some Kei representation
YES!
Hmm I’m actually in Melb wed.
depending on what time My work dinner finishes I’ll swing past.
Heck yeah! FYI I’m skipping work for this so it’s totally a valid excuse.
Saw it was Wednesday, and immediately thought ‘bugger, I WAS having Wednesday off, but it got shifted to Tuesday’. But being at 7pm, I might just be able to make it! Depending on work, I might still be in the beaten-up Hiace work van, otherwise it’ll be the Fairlane. Would love to bring the SV-1 Valiant, but it needs a battery and a master cylinder.
Some automotive trivia about the location – Bertie Street is the location of Toyota Australia head office, and 35 Bertie Street was the location of Peter Brock’s HDT Special Vehicles, which now happens to be the location of the Bunnings carpark!
Stuck here on the wrong side of the world. Hope you get a great turnout. Envious of your ute seat time. Pics please.
I can confirm officially at least one Autopian reader in Melbourne. Alas, can’t believe I’m going to say this for the (perhaps only ever) Autopian Melbourne meetup, but I fear the odds of me making it to Port Melbourne Wednesday evening are desperately thin.
Consider me +1 in spirit if not though.
And my project ute (XG Falcon) is almost as defunct as project cactus, despite being a MUCH better starting point. I suck at cars.
What does the old Falc need?
Me to get off my backside and change a few basics (tyres, battery) then realistically take it to an actual mechanic to fix a few tired bits in the suspension/steering so it can get a roadworthy. Oh, and probably all new door seals by now. Those bits add up to probably more than its worth to buy an average running one now, but that’s hardly the point.
Lawrence really needs to make it there with Cactus. I want pics of the two most famous Aussie utes together!
Mate I really wanted to, but this is a crazy busy time at work just before crops are sown and it’s a 9hr drive down from Dubbo.
Dammit! You are supposed to lie, say you’ll be there, and then have Torch photoshop the utes together, along with you and Lewin in a manly embrace!
It’d be a Melbourne embrace, Manly’s a good 900 kilometers away from the meet!
The Autopian: The Internet’s #1 site for Aussie cartographic humor!
Well, I have been looking for an excuse to visit my sister in Sydney…
As a Finn i regard Kimi my favourite F1-driver ever, but Bottas is also cool. Just bit sad that this ute is propably faster than his Sauber this year.
Need more than 2 days heads-up to get my ass to Australia Mate.
Very fair considering the flight from anywhere else is 10 to 24 hours
<< forgets that it’s barely three hours from New Zealand… >>
Good luck with the meet up, though – that’s a cool looking Ute and cool promotion tie-in with Bottas.