I Don’t Like This Version Of The Hokey Pokey: COTD

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The Tesla Cybertruck is a sensation. It seems like everyone can’t stop watching this stainless steel low-poly truck, regardless if you’re in love with it, hate it, or are just indifferent. Apparently, multiple parts of the Cybertruck can cause deep gashes, which is less than ideal.

Cybertruck owners have been a bit obsessed with sticking body parts into their trucks. Look, I’m not sure how humanity got here, but you can picture me facepalming like Jean-Luc Picard. Some folks have been sticking hands, fingers, legs, feet, and toes into Cybertrucks. Thankfully, nobody’s Cybertruck has fully chopped off anything, but as Lewin wrote, the sharp edges can make your truck a meat slicer. Ouch!

TheDrunkenWrench has turned the Cybertruck’s news cycle into a terrible version of the Hokey Pokey:

You lose your finger here,
You slice your shin right there,
Lose the pedal here, and you shake it all about
You keep the brand in focus, and you give Elon some clout,
That’s what it’s all about!

There are many different versions of the tune, so here’s a random one:

Also, Jason pointed out that Tesla has a fix for the Cybertruck wheel covers that dug into tire sidewalls. The new ones should fix the issue, but wow, they look like they came from Pep Boys. As Hangover Grenade says, this line is poetry:

…or it could be because the new design of the wheel cover already looks like the kind of cheap plastic wheel covers from Pep Boys that you see propped against a yield sign on a traffic island after it flew off the right rear of someone’s Altima.

Poetry.

Jason also showed us where the optional tachometer goes in a Simca 1000, and it’s in a tiny tray down low where nobody is going to be looking. Chronometric gives me a good chuckle with this one:

The engineers said to keep the revs low.

Finally, we have a story from Thomas about a Mercedes breaking down during its auction for sale. If you think that seller’s having a bad day, Hiram McDaniel has a story for you:

I sold a Series 100 Toyota Landcruiser on Cars&Bids. 225K, but rust free and running perfect. Winner came down from Ohio to pick it up, about a 6 hour drive. Checked it out in my driveway, loved it, money and title changed hands. He drove away.

Less than 5 minutes later he called me and asked “what is the ticking sound?” No idea, come back, let’s check it out. Yep, that is a loudass ticking sound coming from driver side of motor. Was 100% not there before.

I wound up giving him his cash back, and he went home without a Landcruiser. Had it towed to a shop, and they scoped cylinder #1. Dropped a valve seat. Almost unheard of in that engine, and that was the moment it decided to happen.

I can’t think of anything he could have done in those 5 minutes to do this, and the shop (a Toyota independent shop) could not either.

Have a great evening, everyone!

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11 thoughts on “I Don’t Like This Version Of The Hokey Pokey: COTD

  1. Cybertruck owners have been a bit obsessed with sticking body parts into their trucks.

    the forbidden dragon (because you’ll lose your wiener)

    1. Well, our national anthem is an English drinking song specifically written to be sung whilst piss drunk, so we’re not exactly clear on that. Could be like how we dumped the “U”s, a way to differentiate ourselves from our former oppressive masters.

      1. Aren’t all national anthems intended to be drinking songs (else, sung whilst drunk)?

        Except Spain. Probably so their drinking doesn’t get interrupted. Smart.

        1. F1 used to be fun when Schumi would win, he would stand perfectly still and staid during the German anthem, and then smile and dance around during the Italian anthem.
          Of course, any anthem sung by Jim Cornelison is automatically awesome.

    1. Despite their desire to shine like an Airstream, most of these already look like a 20 year old stainless steel sink. That seems to be why so many are getting the vinyl wrap job.

  2. All this talk of sticking body parts into the Cyber truck had me worried that the COTD would be about a man sticking something else in the truck. I haven’t read that article so I’m going to assume the noble Autopian commentariat hasn’t gone there.

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