This Chrysler Cirrus Ute For Sale Claims To Be A Prototype But Really It’s Just Bizarre

David sent me this Facebook Marketplace ad for a 1995 Chrysler Cirrus, because I think, on some level, it excited him. Looking at the ad, I found a strange vehicle and a lot of confusing statements. First off, the front end looks more like the sibling car of the Cirrus, the Dodge Stratus. And second off, it’s been converted to some sort of ute-like pickup truck. And third off, the description calls it a “It’s a 1995 Chrysler Cirrus prototype one of a kind, custom interior,” but prototype implies a factory build, and this feels very much like a one-off home-built thing. It’s nicely executed, sure, but prototype level? I dunno about that. Still, I totally understand why David was excited by this: it’s kind of baffling.

Yes, for $8,500 you can be the proud owner of this peculiar and unique beast, complete with sort of strange body panel curve choices and an oddly droopy rear quarter window. The modified design starts from the B-pillar back, and while the shutline of the rear door remains intact, that rear door itself has been highly modified into the “sail” panel that forms the transition between cab and bed.

Of course, I’m not really sure how much we can call this a “bed” as it has a cover with a wing on it that’s a lot like a huge trunk lid. This conversion brings up a complicated philosophical question: Is this now a ute/El Cirrusamino/Stratuschero or is it just a strangely-proportioned coupé with a massive trunk? It does have an actual tailgate, which helps the bed argument, certainly, and perhaps that’s enough to make up for what looks like a non-removable bed cover/trunk lid?

It’s an interesting mix of awkward design but clearly a lot of careful and skilled bodywork. There are no pictures of the “custom interior” so I can’t really speak to the custom-ness of that, but it is very definitely in the interior!

Also, these taillights are kind of driving me nuts:

Whatever they are feels like it’s right on the tip of my brain, but I can’t quite place them. At first I thought Chevy S-10 units, but all the S-10s had reverse lamps integrated, and weren’t quite this shape. They could be a portion of a larger cluster, one where these red parts were on the corner and the reverse lamp and more were on the trunk lid? It almost looks like the corner piece of the Ford Topaz taillight, but I think that lower section is part of that taillight lens unit. What is this from?

If you’re in Canada, and really want a unique sort-of truck that has that fantastic double-whammy of dubiousness, both in design and utility, then I think you’re in luck.

Oh, and also, what the hell is going on with this tow hitch for the motorcycle seated just behind the car?

Is that a tow ball doily? A cozy? Is that a thing? Is it maybe some Canadian affectation? It looks like tow ball covers are a thing, but they seem to be more like Mandalorian helmets or deer heads as opposed to whatever this is. It looks kinda like an HR Geiger alien egg, from like, you know, Alien. Kind of.

Anyway, for whatever reason, David was really hot on me showing all of you this [Ed Note: I just asked JT to write this up. I wasn’t that hot on it. But I’m glad we got you some long-weekend content! Even if it’s more confusing than informative. -DT], and the last thing I need is another disappointed, withering look from David, so there it is: The wonder and majesty of a strange, almost certainly not-actually-a-prototype one-off Chrysler cloud car-a-mino.

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