It’s very important that people know we are pro car here and, with extremely narrow exceptions (aggressive coal-rolling), we are supportive of different car cultures. And when I say “pro car” I don’t mean explicitly that we are blindly supportive of cars as the only means of transportation, but that we are pluralistic when it comes to what an enthusiast car is. If you love old Neons you are just as welcome here as someone who likes new Prii, or mid-century wagons, or Fieros, or whatever. It’s not the choice itself, rather, it’s the act of making a choice that defines a car person in our view.
All that being said, it doesn’t mean we can’t have a little fun with certain cars or car owners. No one is better equipped to make a joke about a particular car than someone who loves it. I mean, Merkur is a punchline around here and no one is a bigger fan of those cars than I am. The nature of the critique, in our mold, must be of the car itself and not specifically the owner. And if it is a reference to the owners it needs to be something a reasonable owner would enjoy. David is great at enforcing this and I’m trying to get better at it.
This all came up this week when trying to decide on names for this post from Jason. Almost all of these are jokes and most of the ones we came up with were light-hearted or clever. I’m sharing the ones that didn’t make the cut, not so much that you can see what we censored but understand why.
I was at auto show parties this week and people were marveling at how great this community is. They love our comments and our commenters. It’s awesome. Thank you. Please view this chat as a way to further understand what we’re hoping to do here and how you, in your own comments (as important members of this community) can contribute to keeping it a great place.
Also, also, also: If you got a shipping notice but haven’t had gear shipped, it either went out yesterday, today, or is going out tomorrow. If you just signed up recently, you should be getting a shipping notice in the next couple of weeks. Thanks for your patience, I promise you it’s worth it.
Without further ado:
There are a lot of good ones in there! I particularly was drawn to:
Complexity of BMWs
Crowd of Mustangs
Asylum of Smarts
A box of Jukes (submitted in comments)
Instagram of Chargers
OKAY, I’ll stop. There are too many good ones to list!
My wife was using “a smug of Prius” back in 2003. She preferred the plural form as ‘Prii’ (this was before Toyota’s decision) but went with the phrase which is more publicly recognizable.
I laughed out loud at “a china shop of Lamborghinis.” I think that one might stick.
FTR, I think it’s possible to be “pro-car” while acknowledging that the cool owners/fans can laugh at themselves.
A tapas of Minis
“A flux of Tesla” would be appropriate. For Chevy Bolts, it’s “An arc of Bolts”.
I have definitely created asylums of Smarts before in the back lot. Mostly cause you can double stack them in one spot or because I find it kind of entertaining to hide them so I tend to park them in a cluster. I take my entertainment wherever I can get it
I love Merkurs! Even though he’s a Mopar guy, I always hope that Gossin is going to one day get his hands on a Scorpio that’s been sitting in someone’s barn for 20 years or something (“I got it for $200 and an old Trans-Am wheel!”)
Seems like private club submittals here. We don’t get to play?
Along the lines of “algebra of BMW’s”:
When BMW came out with latest naming scheme, driving.ca’s headline was “Loose Vowels, BMW is renaming its cars”.
BMW maybe loose bowels?
As an unloved generation Camaro owner, water off a duck’s back 🙂
I did enjoy a Mullet of Camaros.
A “crowd of Mustangs” would be appropriate. Memorializing the folks injured when idiots driving Mustangs slid into crowds.
Or a P38 of Mustangs, or a squadron?
I was just assuming USPS was doing its “we’re not scanning labels so you can’t see how slowly things process through our system” thing again. I’ll look forward to my stuff next week!
I can’t promise that isn’t also happening here. A lot of stuff went out mid-week and may not have updated.
Hey just keep us apprised.
Ugh, I had an eBay order (for something I sold) like that. It was going to my own zip code, but the owner paid for shipping and I didn’t wanna be a weirdo who just plopped it in the box because I knew roughly where the house was, so whatever. In the mail it goes.
First off, I had to go ALL THE WAY to 78701 because the 78703 outpost doesn’t have a parcel postage machine anymore. The neighborhood outpost claimed this machine wasn’t profitable, but good grief, not only are they a public service to where “profitability über alles” should matter less, but it’s a machine that literally takes money 24/7, and that is the thinnest, lamest excuse for making the USPS less accessible for those of us who need to mail stuff after the window closes. (Austin’s closer-in USPS lobbies tend to close after a certain hour, so needing to mail something off-hours is…ugh, do you want to drive my business to FedEx?) Now I have no idea if the “literally en route to where I keep the Porschelump” package actually got there because USPS doesn’t appear to have ever scanned it in. The heck? Should’ve taken like, the next afternoon max to go over to that other house.
There was a book I ordered a while ago that was straight-up stolen en route, too, so like, what the hell, USPS, get your crap together. And that’s coming from me!!! I know entities who don’t have their crap together—I am one!!! If I’m telling someone else their whole damn vibe is a mess, yikes.
(This has been Stef Rants About the Postal Service. Sorry.)
I would have gone with “a box of Nissan Jukes”, i.e. a Jukes-box.
Like the box better. Or a shimmy? A juke is a football term for a feint.