Over the years, certain cars have found niche uses that we can assume the manufacturers had never imagined. I seriously doubt the postwar German engineers that developed the Type 2 Volkswagen Transporter ever envisioned it would be the vehicle of choice for tie-dye clad pot smokers following the Grateful Dead from concert to concert each summer. I remember a Dodge dealer in the 80s explaining the demise of the Omni-based Dodge Rampage pickup as, “once we had sold one to every pool-cleaning guy in the country, we had pretty much exhausted the market.”
Still, it does make sense that a VW bus would be used to haul people around, if not such a specific group on such a specific journey, and of course a pool-cleaning guy needs something with a bed to haul all those skimmers and buckets of chlorine and whatnot.
But elephant hauling?
I had never put any thought into what kind of car an owner of a baby elephant might consider until I saw this image from a 1979 UK Citroen CX brochure:
A copy of this exact brochure was obtained by my ten-year-old self after attending the Birmingham NEC Motor Show when we lived in England (complete with a typewritten, soul-crushing letter to my dad stating “we are afraid that importing our cars to the United States is not possible at this time”). The photography is every bit as good as the images in the Citroen-Maserati SM brochure that I profiled a little while back, and remember, this is pre-Photoshop era. Making the lighting effects on these full-spread pages must have been through some old school alchemy (please excuse my inability to fully doctor out the seam between the brochure’s facing pages).
Breathtaking shots that perfectly capture the essence of the car beneath the modified steel-gray skies of the British isles.
The later pages of the brochure talk about the CX Familiale estate/wagon, and as you can see it’s a tremendously spacious thing inside with room for three forward facing rows as well as an immense space for cargo behind – a marvel in today’s era where most third rows scrape the tailgate. The CX Familiale also boasts the highest count of sunvisors in any one car.
Ah, but the true party trick of the CX was always the hydropneumatic suspension, which allowed not only for superlative ride quality but also for perfectly level ride height regardless of the cargo in back. Baby dumbo proves this out in a dramatic way. I’d recommend air fresheners, and for God’s sake, put plastic down in the cargo area first.
What the brochure fails to note is the elephant in the room (or car) could have also made use of the ball-shaped ashtray located on top of the center console, easily accessible by his or her extended trunk. I doubt the animal would have smoked Gitanes, but had our driver filled the alien-helmet-looking thing with peanuts, I am certain his pet pachyderm could have enjoyed a snack en route to wherever one takes an elephant.
That’s what I call niche marketing.
Good trunk space, what?
“Making the lighting effects on these full-spread pages must have been through some old school alchemy”
Old school alchemist here, we used these:
https://www.bhphotovideo.com/c/product/374620-REG/Tiffen_34CGSF2H_3_x_4_Graduated.html
Just when I thought I was over it, you’ve revived my soul-crushing love for the CX. I’ll be on a wistful downer for the rest of today.
“Yeah but… let’s see that big old pachyderm put his head out the window into the breeze like me…”
Said Fido Chien
The cars and elephants are great but all I can see is the misaligned shot in front of castle.
C’mon, you know the French are leftists.
If a standard CX can handle a baby elephant, can you fit an adult elephant in a high roof LoadRunner?
Those controls! That instrument cluster! ❤️
The only missing one is a pachometer to keep track of your baby elephants.
I need a pachometer!
Not sure why, but very definitely need one.
I can’t believe the baby elephant is not strapped into a rear facing child seat. That’s so irresponsible. It’s going to die.
Mon dieu, quelle folie! I absolutely adore this ad, that car and the French. I’m a little bit biased as I carry French citizenship, but how can you not? C’est magnifique!
En effet, ça pète sa mère.
I’m just disappointed that the elephant isn’t making use of any of the 4 sun visors at his or her disposal.
Zut alors! this dash binnacle has EVERYTHING. Those warning lights. Anyone care to guess? My take:
1. Fog lights
2. E-brake
3. Headlights
4. Turn indicator
5. Spatula
6. Hazard
7. Close elevator doors
8. Birthday gift
9. Stop (2x)
10. Oil
11. Temperature
12. Sweaty balls
13. Fuel
14. Other brake
15. Fog lights
16. Driving lights
17. Baguette
Oh and the speedometer looks like Bubbles from Trailer Park Boys!
The last car my dad had was a CX Safari. Massive silver spaceship. It was a replacement for his GSA, and GS before that, and my mum had a 2CV (that I would inherit when it was ten years old).
It’s why I’m a bit blind to car weirdness. I grew up with a mashup of 1930’s technology and spaceships.
Oh, yeah, Mercedes-Benz used the same hydropneumatic suspension technology, under license from Citroën, for the rear suspension on their station wagons on the W123 platform (& some others.) Gotta replace the accumulators on my kid’s 300TD; it currently wallows like a small cruise ship over speed bumps and on the highways (which are in somewhat dire shape around here.) Fortunately, thanks to the enduring popularity of vintage Citroëns around the world, such components are still readily available. Vive le Citroën!
The Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow also used Citroën hydro-pneumatic suspension.
Oh my, the drum speedo and…tach? I would crash constantly because I couldn’t take my eyes off them.
Why do they call an elephant’s nose a trunk when it’s located at the front of the animal? Shouldn’t it be a frunk?
In England, its nose is called a boot.
Or a toob
And you show some modesty and cover your motor with a bonnet.
Why do we call the cargo compartment a “frunk” when it’s in the front but not a “bunk” when it’s in the back?
In the olden days they would lash steamer trunks to the back of cars and the term stuck. I am almost certain one of the writers on this site covered this, though perhaps at the old site.
This whole post is trunk redundancy.
That elephant is so not alive, it is hard to ignore. Either that, or it has been to many photo shoots before and knows exactly how to maintain a pose.
Also, the fact that ‘dad’ doesn’t even pretend to hold a steering wheel bothers me a lot. Heck, they could have given him a loose wheel to hold.
The CX had self-centering steering. Going in a straight line, there was no need to hold the wheel.
I believe his right hand is resting ever so lightly on the bottom of the wheel.
Pretty sure that elephant was never within a kilometer of the CX. They didn’t have Photoshop, but they had scissors and glue.
I like to imagine they referred to it as photochop back then
That image of the third row just summons a cacophony of “Stop touching me! No, YOU stop touching ME! MOOOOM!! She’s looking out MY window!!!”
Actual statements made by my kids.
Ah but these are French children. They just sigh and succumb to their fate with a sense of general ennui, knowing that this is all just part of the suffering of life that they will have to endure. Just look at that family – are they enjoying one of the most beautiful, futuristic and comfortable cars ever made? Non, absolument pas. The only one who hasn’t given up already is the little girl stuck between grand-pére and grand-mére.
I don’t see a single cigarette anywhere in that picture. You sure those kids are French?
Kids smoke when they are 18 here. There should be a bottle of Bourgogne somewhere though.