Chevies That Haven’t Been Driven To The Levee Much: 1981 Citation vs 1992 Beretta

Sbsd 3 11 2024
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Good morning, Autopians! It’s an hour later than you feel like it should be, thanks to our old friend Daylight Saving Time. I’m here to help ease your mental jet lag with a couple of nicely preserved, low-mileage Chevrolets.

Friday, we took a trip east, and found slim pickings in the state of Maryland. (Lucky for us, the house-hunting is better than the car-hunting in those parts.) The prevailing opinion seemed to be that the idea of the old Pontiac wagon was pretty cool, but that particular one was just too far gone. Fixing up an old car is one thing, but literally pulling one out of a junkyard is next-level automotive resurrection, and as so often happens when bringing things back from the dead, it came back a little, well, wrong.

That little wine-colored Mercedes, on the other hand, is a gem. Yes, it can be outrun by a senior citizen on a Rascal, at least for the first twenty yards or so, but it’s in nice shape, and has hundreds of thousands of miles left in it. It was no contest at all, really. But I had to include that Pontiac; how often do you see a Catalina wagon for sale at all?

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Moving on: We have a semi-regular feature here called “GM Hit Or Miss,” which celebrates the automotive juggernaut’s tendency to swing for the fences with a new idea. Sometimes it knocks it out of the park, and sometimes it swings at a stupid curveball and completely whiffs. Far more often, though, it tends to hit good predictable singles, little dribblers that slip past the shortstop for long enough to get on base. But hey, put enough of those little singles together, and you’ve got yourself on the scoreboard. All you have to do is not strike out in the meantime.

So here is a lesson in perseverance, in steadily improving and not messing with something that works. One of today’s cars is an evolution of the other. They both use the same basic powertrain – a 60-degree pushrod V6 coupled to a Turbo-Hydramatic 125C transmission – with eleven years of development and lessons learned between them. Let’s take a look.

1981 Chevrolet Citation – $5,900

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Engine/drivetrain: 2.8-liter overhead valve V6, three-speed automatic, FWD

Location: York, PA

Odometer reading: 43,000 miles

Operational status: Not expressly stated, actually

I can hear it now: “The Citation? A hit? All right; this guy has finally lost it.” But Chevy sold a million and a half of these things, in just five years, and applied lessons learned from it to generations of cars to follow. Yes, it was half-baked, rushed into production, and spawned a ton of recalls. But it sold. Put it this way: Encino Man was considered a hit, too.

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The Citation, and its fellow X-body vehicles, were the first cars to use the 60-degree V6 that saw use in countless GM vehicles, both front- and rear-wheel-drive. Here, it displaces 2.8 liters, is fed by a two-barrel carburetor, and drives the front wheels through a three-speed automatic. This one has only 43,000 miles on it. The ad doesn’t expressly say how well (or even if) it runs, but for this price, at that mileage, it had better purr like a kitten.

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It’s clean inside, but even as nice as this one is, you can see that these were not well-built cars. Fit and finish is all over the place, and the beige plastic is several different shades. The Citation has one feature inside that I always thought would be annoying: the radio is mounted vertically in the dash. The stock radio had the numbers on the dial oriented correctly, but if you installed an aftermarket stereo, you’d have to turn your head sideways to read it.

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The plastic bumper filler panels are gone, of course, but otherwise it’s a time capsule to the early ’80s outside. And yes, that beige-over-red two-tone job was from the factory. You could get red over beige, too. Maybe it’s not just colors that need to come back, but multiple colors. And five-door hatchbacks definitely need to make a comeback.

1992 Chevrolet Beretta GT – $4,999

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Engine/drivetrain: 3.1-liter overhead valve V6, three-speed automatic, FWD

Location: Shoreline, WA

Odometer reading: 41,000 miles

Operational status: “Must drive to appreciate” they say

The X-body was a bit of a fiasco for GM, but its basic layout had legs. The J, A, N, and L platforms were all developments of the basic front-wheel-drive X architecture: McPherson struts in front, beam axle in back, transverse engine, under economy cars, family sedans, wagons, and sporty coupes. It’s the same basic idea as Chrysler’s many K-car variants. But hey, everything on Taco Bell’s menu is made from like eight ingredients combined in different ways, too. It works for them.

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The V6 had gained a little displacement and multi-port fuel injection by the time it found its way under the hood of this Beretta GT. It’s backed by the same three-speed automatic, not sophisticated, but fairly reliable. With only 41,000 miles on it, this one runs beautifully.

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GM interiors were still not exactly luxurious in ’92, but they were a whole lot better put together. And these Berettas were pretty comfortable cars. Obviously, with the low mileage, it’s in beautiful condition. Anyone with any experience of GM cars of this era can look at this photo and know exactly what this car feels, sounds, and smells like inside. They’re all pretty much the same.

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The GT had a few cool touches outside, like a rear spoiler, those fabulous basket-weave wheels, and flashy badges. This one looks like it just rolled out of a showroom in 1992. Even the headlights aren’t cloudy.

Yes, I know; they’re both expensive. I don’t set the prices. And really, if you look at what ’80s and ’90s nostalgia costs these days, these aren’t bad. They’re both clean, low-mileage cars that are sure to start conversations at any gearhead gathering. All you have to do is choose a generation.

(Image credits: Craigslist sellers)

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124 thoughts on “Chevies That Haven’t Been Driven To The Levee Much: 1981 Citation vs 1992 Beretta

  1. Ooof the prices esp. for that Citation. A friend had one of those and it had some clatter that we couldn’t figure out. I think it was an exhaust heat shield. And the left rear door was held closed with some rope.

    The Beretta while still overpriced was always a decent rental car. Comfortable enough for a week in Orlando with enough room in the trunk.

    Neither of these is a collector so much as a survivor so there’s that.

  2. The Beretta is objectively a better car, but the Citation has more character and it’s a 5-door hatchback. I’m willing to bet it’s the same car that I used to see around Andersonville in Chicago until it was sold a few years ago. There just cannot be two nice beige-over-red 5-door Citations left.

  3. The Beretta is so much better of a car, and so much better looking of a car, than a Citation, that is may as well be a spaceship in comparison.

  4. The 5-door Citation is interesting and if the prices were swapped, I’d think about it. But the Beretta is a decent deal for its condition and the ’90s are pretty popular. It’s not what I think of as a “classic” but might be for some.

  5. Citation. It’s a clean survivor that would generate more interest at a car show than most modern supercars. Keeping it running won’t cost an arm and a leg either.

  6. Beretta any day of the week.

    I had a 1984 Citation. Wasn’t the worst car out there at the time (era of the Chevette and K-car), but it was enough to ensure I remained a virgin for well after the car was sold.

  7. I remember a picture in Car and Driver from the time the X-cars came out, showing the rear wheel + axle pulling right out of the car. Quality was not one of the Citation’s strong points. However, it may well be the best Citation left of the plant at any price. Therefore, I would choose it to put in my imaginary Museum of Average Cars, so visitors could see an example of the engineering decisions that turned GM from the largest and most respected auto maker in the world to what it is today.

    That Beretta isn’t bad, though.

  8. I only know the Beretta from an old episode of World’s Wildest Police Chases, so I picked that one in case I need to run from some 80s/90s police cars

  9. Ooof! Like choosing between a root canal and colonoscopy. Torch should do a “Would you rather…” based around these two cars.

    The Beretta is cheaper and a coupe. It wins by default.

    It’s an hour later than you feel like it should be, thanks to our old friend Daylight Saving Time.

    Non-sequitur: I saw a Fisker Ocean out in the wild this morning. Thanks to DST, I could only recognize it from its unusual D-pillar taillights. Very distinctive how both of these lights are visible from straight behind, but one light disappears when it goes around a curve (there was traffic between, so it was ~100 yds ahead). Also interesting is that the thin taillights in the tailgate don’t blink with the turn signal, just the D-pillar and bumper taillights. The thin lights continue on to the fender, so it’s not like bumper only lights are necessary for tailgate open driving.

    1. I saw a more common but still rare Lucid Air yesterday.

      Its taillights really work for the design, making the whole package seem even sleeker than it is. THIS is what little kid Jack imagined 21st century vehicles would look like, not giant vaguely menacing boxes.

    2. Clocks don’t change til the end of the month here in Merrie olde Englandland :/

      I desperately need more evening daylight, or I’ll go mad, ease of identifying cars notwithstanding; the winter needs to fuck right off now…

    3. I am a big fan of Benjamin Franklin, but Daylight Savings was not a great idea. I am always reminded of what a wise Native American said about it: “only a white man would think that you can cut a foot off the end of a blanket, sew it on the other end and get a longer blanket.”

  10. I have slightly better memories of Berettas than I do Citations, and it’s cheaper.Kind of a no-brainer today.

  11. I can’t think of too many cars I’d want less than a Citation? Hell even the damn name brings a negative connotation. Though I’d have to imagine I would be safe from receiving citations in my Citation. Or at least speed related ones.

    I love me some survivor quirk, but that’s a ton of money for an objectively terrible car.

    So the Beretta wins by default here. At least it looks ok, even if I have no particular design to own or drive one. It too brings survivor intrigue; I haven’t seen one in this sort of condition in the Northeast since Y2K.

  12. This is a bit of a hold-your-nose-and-vote kind of day for me, but I’ll go with the Citation. I have some minor concerns about it, though. As Mr. Barth pointed out below, something is up with the paint. I am also seeing some other minor flaws (a few small rust spots, a subtle stain on the driver’s seat, a few scuffs in the plastic in the cargo area, etc.), so this isn’t the concours grade car it appears to be at first glance. It is still a nice example of a Citation, though, and I think it is more interesting than the Beretta.

  13. I had as my second car a 1982 Citation V6 4 door. It was the same beige as this car, even the same hubcaps. It also had an automatic, PS, PB, and AC.

    I will once again be a contrarian and go for the Citation. It was not a bad car*. In fact, it was, in its day, pretty peppy. And the rear seats folded flat, and you had an area in the trunk that was big enough to hold a 2×15″ Bass Speaker cabinet, a power amp (GK), and two basses. I don’t think I had the 2×10″ cabinet that went on top of the 15s but it was a really practical car. It was roomy, and I know people complained about the brakes but I don’t remember having any lock up issues.

    The only reason it got a* was that the head gasket went. It was on its way out, and in 1989, I loaned the car to a girl I knew, who wanted to go to a party in Downtown Detroit. I told her “You know, I’m not sure that the car is going to make it. It’s guzzling coolant, and when the warning lights light up, the car is going to die, so you need to pull over, wait a few minutes, and then you need to take this glove, open the radiator, and I’ve got a bunch of 2 liter bottles with water in them, so you dump them in, it’ll get you home…

    But she really wanted to go to the party, so she took the car. The next day, she wasn’t too happy, and she said “Don’t ever let me borrow your car again. It died on the highway, and I had to get it towed back…”

  14. Citation. If the goal is to get the “holy shit how did this survive” reaction, then showing up in a mint Citation is on the same level as a mint Gremlin. I can’t believe how clean that thing is from top to bottom. This objectively crappy car has somehow spent 40 years getting the same kind of treatment a dad reserves for his Corvette. I have no idea why anyone put that much effort into a Citation, but I respect it.

  15. Contrarian vote: I have an odd affection for the Citation*. A good friend had one & delivered pizzas in it for years. It just kept chugging on—until the cost of replacing the ps pump (they said you have to remove the motor iirc) finally spelled the end at over 200 hard k miles.

    *not withstanding the pneumonia from leaning out & manually working the wipers for 20 miles of sleet. Ok, so love/hate. But it really just did keep going through floods & abuse & neglect

    1. I think it’s old people who survived the Great Depression and the austerity of WW2 scrap drives who preserved things like this and it’s always the least desirable spec whether or not it’s an otherwise desirable car. I used to find it infuriating as the only rust-free or close to rust-free and decently-maintained examples of cars I wanted were the worst spec in the worst color. It was like that for a lot of ’50s and ’60s American cars when many of them were still attainable (one exception was an awesome old lady who was the original owner of a ’67 Firebird with a manual 326, though she also wasn’t selling) or other odd balls I looked at, but also—particularly infuriating for me—old Subarus. When I wanted a 3rd EA81 in the late ’90s (especially the pillarless hardtop, though also a wagon, BRAT, or sedan with a manual) all I could find were automatics in the worst colors as hatchbacks (of course, they built those for a few years longer, so they had a few extra years before rotting away) or maybe wagons sometimes with the rather rare 1.6 (because the 1.8 was just too much power) and it was about the same situation with 1st generation Legacys and I wasn’t excluding 4WD/AWD back then. My FWD 5MT low roof wagon in Majestic Blue (similar to later WRB) was pretty much a lucky unicorn and turbos were all rusted and usually otherwise trashed (because those old people didn’t buy them), though at least they made for decent engine donors.

      1. I gave up on the EA81s around here in the mid 90s: the manuals available were rusted, high-mileage examples that mountain folk had used to commute, so pretty beat even for me. Had a sweet run in the mid to late 90s when I bought a bunch of the ea82s and kinda stockpiled them.

        Diesel Mercedes were different beasts: best bought in poor neighborhoods after a year or two of being parked because the owner didn’t understand them

  16. I don’t REALLY want the Citation, but I want a Beretta even less. At least the Citation has novelty going for it. I’ll reluctantly take that.

  17. I want that Beretta so badly. I’d trade my Sunbird for it right now, and that’s saying something. That 3.1 V6 powered the Corsica LT I basically grew up in. Fond memories of that exhaust note that grew raspier over time as the muffler started to rust.

    1. My best friend in high school had that Corsica (side note: seriously, are they all gone at this point? You’ll occasionally see a Beretta in the wild now, but never a Corsica) and the exact same muffler issue!

      But it finally only died after he handed it down to his sister, who let it run dry…of oil.

    2. I suffer the same 3.1 V6 nostalgia that you do, thanks to my parents’ ’91 Grand Prix.

      And this Beretta is within 20 miles of me. The only things keeping me from actually considering it are 1) no parking space and 2) a 3.1 Lumina I owned about 3 years ago reminded me of why nostalgia alone is a bad idea.

      (That said, it was a less-than-no-brainer to select it in the poll)

  18. My old man bought a Corsica LTZ (the not really cool but trying) clapped out black from the factory new in 89 and drove it to 350k so while not the best cars the Beretta is the easy choice here.

    It was the car I learned to drive on. In fact, I remember the first time my dad took me out on the back roads of central Illinois. I can still feel the spongy steering wheel.

    Its a shame that it’s a 92 since Berettas had really cool digital dashes available.

  19. Co-worker had a Beretta, and we put some long miles on it. It road OK and wasn’t too loud or whinny. I’ll take it. I like the blue too

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