Cold Start: The Hell Happened To All My Stuff?

Cs Emptybed
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I really admire artists who can create images that just, somehow, tell a story wordlessly, and I think this painting from a 1956 Ford G350 truck brochure really does that. Something about the position of that man, the way his hand rests on the bedside, the posture, the stare, looking into that vast, empty truck bed, all of that somehow communicates the slow-burn confusion of someone who has no idea what happened to all the shit that was supposed to be in that truck.

It’s not just me, right? You see it too? He looks genuinely confused, even though we can’t see his face, but his body language is that of someone frozen in confusion.

It’s incredible. Even if it’s not intentional, which, let’s be honest, I doubt it is.

Seriously, though, where did everything go?

 

UPDATE: I saw some comments from people unaware of the Ford G-series of trucks, even speculating that I – me! – could have, somehow, made a typo and meant F350. I did not. Look:

 

Cs G350

These are Dutch-market Fords, but still. Ford G-series.

44 thoughts on “Cold Start: The Hell Happened To All My Stuff?

  1. It’s the two smug looking gyus on the passenger bench of the G700. They played a prank on him and took his stuff! Just look at them..

    Also a fun FK(?) logo on those Fords. Never seen that before.
    Does it mean Ford Köln? (Where the bigggest continental european plant was)

  2. Born in 1950, I grew up in a Dutch village around 1960 and I do remember having actually seen these trucks on the road. The FK logo stands for Ford Köln, meaning they were made in the Ford factory in Cologne, Germany. For a Wikipedia article about them, take a look at: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ford_FK — that page has an actual photo of this type of truck, and it will give you also more info about its disastrous two-stroke diesel engine. These specially-designed diesel engines proved so troublesome that they were soon discontinued, after which the trucks were sold only with a regular gas-guzzling V8.

  3. Can we talk about the (presumably) Ford emblem jauntily affixed on the leading edge of those trucks? I’m not a Ford guy-not even a pickup guy-but those speak to me!

    It’s a sign, I tell ya: I’ve been squirreling $100 bills away dreaming of building a Pinto wagon for Lemons, and this is confirmation that I’m on the right track.

  4. I know that dealer from that stamp on the brochure in the update! From the era we didn’t have area codes yet. Zandvoortselaan still is one of the only two roads leading to Zanvoort, so I used to spend hours in slow moving traffic heading to or coming back from Zandvoort. Double/triple trouble when it was F1 weekend! I can remember them from the sixties till about 15 or 20 years ago when they made way for houses.

    The Autopian: For your old Dutch memories. Wow….!

  5. Alternatively, he had a big pile of manure in there, and after offloading, he painstakingly sanitized the entire bed. Now he is admiring his handiwork.

  6. For a second there I was wondering what kind of bejeweled body-mod hardware this gent had installed on his forearm. Maybe some cool cyborg timepiece? But then I saw the bolt hexhead floating above it and then I was disappoint.

  7. What strikes me, beyond the farmer wondering who stole his turnips, is how pristine the truck bed is. I mean, you could eat those missing turnips right off those unbelievably clean wooden planks! I doubt those trucks even left the factory that clean.

  8. I looked at it before I read the copy and saw a guy lost in thoughts and dreams of the potential to do things. Before country and western turned pickups into an identity statement they used to be for doing stuff. I think. I was born in the sixties, so I must have missed it.

    1. So true. Trucks were for work. The only people who drove them around for transportation only were generally kids who inherited dad’s old farm truck to drive to school.

  9. Reminds me of the famous Top Gear Semi-Truck and Ambulance challenges.

    “Where is the car?” “I don’t know.”

    “Where is your patient?” “He got better, he’s down at the pub I suppose.”

    1. And you may ask yourself, “Where is that large automobile?”
      And you may tell yourself, “This is not my beautiful house”
      And you may tell yourself, “This is not my beautiful wife”

  10. The great thing about older trucks (which conversely is the terrible thing about new trucks), is they weren’t particularly tall. So this guy must be on his knees. Which I guess does track with the story you’re seeing Torch. “Who took all my tools!?!” Seriously, tool thieves are the worst.

        1. Its a custom bed on a chassis there are no provisions for wheel wells which means it is sitting up pretty high to clear the rear wheels.

          1. No, I think it is one of these
            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ford_FK#/media/File:Ford_K%C3%B6ln_Diesel_1957_v.jpg
            The Ford FK, short for “Ford Köln,” is a series of medium-duty trucks built by Ford of Germany in their Cologne (Köln) plant in two generations from 1951 until 1961.
            Apparently, the two-stroke diesel engines in the second generation were so bad that Ford Cologne left the truck business.
            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ford_FK
            Here is a manual for the 1956 Ford G350-700 Diesel Truck in Spanish
            https://articulo.mercadolibre.com.ar/MLA-934170794-ford-g350-700-diesel-1956-camion-libro-manual-_JM

      1. Man, Google will NOT give me any information on the G series. It seems to think I mean F every time. Even when I say ‘do not include F350’

        1. From the brochure it looks like the three engine options were two-stroke diesels of either V4 or V6 configuration, or a conventional gasoline flathead V8.

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