Today, any bit of nostalgia from storied SUV names has been stripped as clean as grocery store shelves after they’ve predicted two inches of snow in Dallas. We’ve had FJ Cruisers, Broncos, Wagoneers, and an “Eclipse Cross” to capture the name of something that wasn’t even a truck. It’s hard to imagine there’s anything left out there to revive, or at least anything worthwhile, but there actually is one SUV many Americans don’t know about that seems worth the effort.
There’s a storied off-roader with a seventy-year history that is still being built today. It started out as a very basic machine but is now a large, luxurious barge that seems to be a far cry from the original. Oh, you’re talking about the Toyota Land Cruiser, right? Wrong.
Not For The States
I was reminded of this a few weeks back since my wife’s favorite Christmas song is Last Christmas (the original, not the damn Taylor Swift version, of course). The video for this song has played many, many times at our home and begins with George Michael and Andrew Ridgley’s very eighties looking crew arriving at a ski lodge in two vehicles: a Euro-spec Jeep CJ with Swiss license plates and an example of the truck I’ve just been referring to: a four-door Nissan/Datsun Patrol.
Even if you’re a pretty car-obsessed American reader, you could be forgiven for not knowing what the hell this elusive Nissan truck even is. Designed primarily for places with minimal roads, the Patrol was introduced about the same time as the better-known Land Cruiser in 1951; like that machine it was a rather obvious facsimile of the American Willys Jeeps. Within a few inches of the dimensions for the Jeep and the Cruiser, the Patrol also featured a four-cylinder engine powering all four wheels. You can see the similarities below:
As with the Toyota, the Patrol slowly became larger and more refined, with the second generation 1960-1980 model gaining a four door enclosed version as well. Wait, are those side marker lights on the one in the picture below? They sure are- this particular generation was actually offered in rather small numbers for the US until 1969 (and was the only Nissan product sold here without a “Datsun” badge until the eighties).
If you’re well versed in the progression of Land Cruiser models, you’d find a lot of similarities in the later generations of Patrols. It’s the expected transition from open-buggy-type vehicle to more refined, early Range Rover-like machines such as the 1980-87 third-gen, 1987-97 fourth-gen, and the 1997-2016 fifth-gen (though that one is still being produced in some nations).
Much to the chagrin of hard-core off roaders, Nissan followed Toyota in going over the top with their recent Patrol models. The just-discontinued 200 series Land Cruiser was a 6000 pound monster with a 5.7 liter V8 and a refrigerator in the center console. The current (since 2010) sixth generation Nissan Patrol follows the same formula as that behemoth; released in 2010, it’s actually the first one since the second generation to reach America; you probably didn’t know that since it’s offered here as the Nissan Armada and Infiniti QX80.
Ah, but Toyota has held back on us Americans as well, and is currently still holding back. For example, the current 300 Series Cruiser is not available in the US. Toyota does offer the smaller Prado model here, sold here now as the Lexus GX550 (an all-new model which sports a much-boxier-than-before but still modern look).
However, Toyota’s 70 Series Cruiser is forbidden fruit here in the States. This smaller Land Cruiser has been produced virtually unchanged from when it was introduced in 1984. It’s only sold in selected markets where safety and emissions regulations allow. Yes, that’s a brand new 2024 truck in the picture below:
Is our own David Tracy the only person on earth that might like this kind of bare-bones off roader in their driveway or parking space? A no-nonsense machine with a design that transcends trends and styling cues? Let’s find out.
Keeping It Real (Real Simple)
I’d like to see an off-roader with a design somewhere between the new Land Cruiser Prado/GX550 and the barely-changed-since-1984 70 series; a design that’s unapologetically square but with the latest technology and mechanicals. I’m envisioning something similar to a Mercedes G-Wagon in that it’s a relatively new-from-the-ground-up design (2018) that still looks very, very similar to the original 1979 model. I hear comments all of the time from people that want the Jeep XJ to magically reappear as a boxy brand-new truck. It’s pretty much understood that Stellantis will never do that, but what about Nissan? I haven’t seen a Nissan truck that I’ve wanted since the 1986 Hardbody, so it’s about time that they tried something different. Where do we begin?
The fourth-gen 1980-86 Patrol as seen in that Wham! video is closest to the cubist SUV gestalt that I’m looking for, so I’d like to use that as our starting point. If you asked AI to do a rendering of an “80s Japanese sport utility” this is pretty much what it would come back with, a smattering of Mitsubishi Montero and Isuzu Trooper thrown in the mix for good measure. With Patrols, this is the cleanest shape of the lot; the one that is most closely related to the ideals of this aesthetic that we’re trying to emulate, namely the aforementioned Jeep XJ Cherokee and the first Range Rover. There’s nothing superfluous in any of the details; you could enjoy it bone stock as no-frills all-weather family transportation or trick it out with a catalog full of off-road goodies.
Mechanically, this new Patrol would be based on the D41 Frontier pickup, further maintaining its industrial roots and making it a very different product in the Nissan lineup from the more car-like current Pathfinder. With the 3.8 liter 310 horsepower V6 and nine-speed automatic as standard, it aches my heart to not be able to offer diesel or manual transmissions as options, but we could always hope. My hope would be that the Patrol would soldier on as an ICE-powered machine even after the other more-crossover-type offerings in the stable have gone electric.
I’m glad to see that Nissan is making a tribute to the beloved 1986 “Hardbody” truck design that includes the trademark angular wheels. These might look slick as an option for our new Patrol instead of the gold NISMO rims I’ve shown above:
In back, you get the same clean look as an eighties truck but updated with more modern detailing:
You might expect a bare bones interior, but you’ll get a nicely equipped and trimmed space that is still purely functional. I kind of used the interior design I did for the Hardbody truck revival a little while back as a starting point. The air vents for the HVAC are surrounded by knobs that control things like the headlights and the climate control; big chunky things you could operate with gloves on. The audio controls look like an old school radio (but the display is on the main screens), and below that are chunky light-switch-looking things for secondary controls (same design used for the power window switches).
Yes, it’s an automatic, and indeed you could switch the transfer case with the touch screens, but you’re getting a leather-booted PRNDL shifter with a matching 2H/4H/4L lever next to it, dammit.
Along the top surface of the dash there are display screens in the typical fashion of cars today where they appear stuck on and look as if they could be removed and carried away from the car. You know what? In this thing, that’s exactly what they are. Take them out to the campsite or your office; just don’t lose it or you can’t start the car. The module on the far right is actually a battery pack (with solar panels on the back) that can be removed to power your phone or other equipment.
Overall, it’s an odd combination of old world elements and new technology, but that’s the point of the whole truck to begin with.
Would Back-To-Basics Be A Hit Or Miss?
You know how it goes; people make a lot of noise about wanting products that are simpler and less flashy yet never put their money where their mouth is – the death of manual transmissions is a perfect example. A boxy retro truck would have fans, but there’s also only so many Davids Tracy out there, and of those there are even less that have $60,000 or so to drop on a new SUV. Still, my 100 Series Land Cruiser owning colleague has just put down a deposit on that industrial-looking new Lexus GX550 without even driving it. Also, the success of the new Bronco and continued sales of Jeep Wranglers says that the buyers for this kind of thing do indeed exist.
Truth be told, I had to do a Google search to see what the latest Pathfinder even looks like. Can you think of a better indication that Nissan needs to at least try to go back to their roots a bit?
Given that yet 70 series has a 2 year wait list here in Australia just cause it has a V8, in mure if you put V8 power in it it would sell like hotcakes too!
This would be a hit. People are thirsty for the retro box design right now. I know I am. Called my Lexus dealer this morning to get on the GX waitlist. Told me I was 60 deep (in a small market store) I’ve heard large markets are hundreds deep on their lists.
Yes, my work colleague has yet to get any kind of indication as to when he can expect to see his new GX. Likely many months.
“The fourth-gen 1980-86 Patrol as seen in that Wham! video is closest to the cubist SUV gestalt that I’m looking for, so I’d like to use that as our starting point. If you asked AI to do a rendering of an “80s Japanese sport utility” this is pretty much what it would come back with, a smattering of Mitsubishi Montero and Isuzu Trooper thrown in the mix for good measure”
I see a lot more Lada Niva.
I’m here for that as well!
Also: Wham! gets a lot of guff, but as a death metal fan, I unapologetically and unironically love their hits. George Michael was an incredible songwriter and arranger. RIP.
Last Christmas SLAPS.
My appreciation for George Michael really only happened after the LA bathroom debacle. During the 80s I had dismissed Wham! as boy band crap so I ignored it as much as I could. His solo stuff was OK.
I very much liked the tounge in cheek humor George Michael showed in his song and video “Outside” about the bathroom scandal (especially the bathroom transforming into a disco). That inspired me to revisit his earlier works including Wham! as an adult and much to my surprise founded I liked those as well. A documentary I saw a few years ago about his life mentioned his extensive, anonymous philanthropy. It made me wish I had appreciated him more in life.
Indeed, and his later, underrated solo stuff shows that he had real depth.
kind of favors the love child of a last gen Isuzu trooper and the new upcoming Hyandai Sante Fe. Your talents amaze me Bishop.
I like the general concept, I would personally love a low cost option to the Bronco / Wrangler. Something that would be a modern version of the Trooper or Montero as you mentioned specifically from the late 80’s. Those trucks offered utility that rivaled that of the Wrangler, Bronco, Bronco II, Blazer K5, Jimmy, S10 Blazer ETC, but was much less expensive and had bone simple mechanicals.
The trick to this would be to find a way to build it without a turbo \ hybrid powerplant and give it a couple of power / drivetrain options. I would suggest 3 options:
First a NA 4 cyl base engine. maybe the QG15DE from the Asian market. pair that with a 6 speed base transmission or an 9 speed auto and a real 2 speed transfer case
Then offer the VQ38DD from the frontier with the 9 speed auto and a 2 speed transfer case (and an option for a “Pro-4X” with lockers and more)
Lastly offer a 4cyl turbo diesel option with both transmissions and the 2 speed transfer case.
All of those options are bone simple, tried and true tested technology and require no investment. Utilize existing technology and all you would need is to bring it to market.
The great thing that Nissan did when it built the Xterra was that it kept it simple and used cheap materials and parts bin crap and cast it as “rugged and easy to clean”. People can spin anything. Make the entire interior out of hard grey plastic and explain it away as “its cool, we did it on purpose so you can hose it out”. Use that same thing with this.
That would be the key. Make it cheap for the sake of being cheap. Hide that cheapness as part of the overall experience. Nobody expects the inside of an Element to be luxury, you expect it to feel like a Rubbermaid factory was having a clearance sale and Honda bought them out. Its part of its charm, its WHY you buy one. So sell this as a cheap, simple, off road warrior that feels old, cheap, retro and agricultural because that is how its supposed to feel. But not really… but it should remind us of what those cool old Patrol’s, Troopers and the like felt like.
Keep it under $40,000 and heck I would buy one. I like the idea of the Maverick but I don’t want a “baby truck”. I want something cool that can go off road and that I can afford.
I’m a fan of the GQ (4th gen) and GU (5th gen) patrols, but I can get behind this…
As a side note the most fun/sketchy vehicle I’ve ever been in was a 1 mothered, 40 fathered, mongrel of a MK/MQ (3rd gen) Patrol with a 4 speed, 3.3l diesel straight six (SD33) and apparently had the turbo off a Supra on it…
Sounded incredible, went semi ok, handled like a nun carrying a mattress…
Later when I helped the owner do some troubleshooting we found 26 cracks in the head… torqued it down harder, intercooled it and went again… he sold it for more than he ever invested in it too… was no where near legal at any stage
This would sell great in the $40k range.
Here’s one for you.
What would an International
Harvester EV look like?
I don’t understand why they never sold it here back then. Even in the 80s, SUV’s have been very popular here.
The Patrol, Prado, Proceed, and others would have been successful in the 80s.
Your ideas are intriguing to me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.
I’ve got some real bad news for you… https://www.carexpert.com.au/car-news/everything-we-know-about-the-next-turbo-v6-only-nissan-patrol
I did see that. It’s like a Range Rover altered and debranded for a bank financing advertisement.
Jeez what is up with Nissan’s design department? The only decent looking things they make right now are the Z and the GTR. Everything else looks like warmed over 2010s designs or off-brand versions of better cars.
I was kind of reminded of that when I saw the cover shot from Lewin’s recent post. Appears to be the whole Nissan lineup in the image, and other than the Z I can’t really tell what’s what.
How Many Different Models Of Car Are There? – The Autopian
You’ve got the wishy washy crossover, the other crossover, the midsize and full size SUVs that are the same size, and truck
What you are describing is called the Xterra, and Nissan should bring it back.
The Xterra is still sold in the middle east. And yeah, they should sell it here.
Nissan cancelling the Xterra in the U.S. was such a bizarre move. It was having a 4Runner-esque resurgence late in it’s life, and instead of keeping it around with minor updates or redesigning it, they put it out to pasture.
I knew a lot of people who loved the Xterra as a more afforable 4Runner. They’d sell well today even if it looked almost exactly the same as it did (which btw, it always looked real good).
That would sell so hard. It’s crazy to me how badly Nissan is doing, and it’s mostly whoever is making the decisions on designs and which cars to focus on.
Don’t you want the hot new ARIYA? It’s a generic looking crossover! Or the latest Kicks! Now more boring! Or the Versa, Sentra, or Altima, if you’re having difficulty sleeping! And the redesigned Rogue, for the anonymous cog beaten down by life who needs a car to match their lifestyle!
Would this not just be the Nissan take on the J250 Land Cruiser?
As I said above, it’s to be somewhere between the J250 and the 70 series. I’m envisioning Frontier mechanicals so more crude than the J250 but still more advanced than the 70 series Cruiser (which is not a tough thing to do). Would be targeting the Patrol to be less expensive than the Lexus, at least in the US market.
Can we get Roy Roger’s great grandkid to sell it?
I was hoping to unearth the Datsun Voice Guy from the late seventies through the eighties : “The new Patrol ….power steering…power brakes… and power styling! Datsun. We. Are. Driven”.
As a long-time jeep and truck owner, I am all for back to basics but ‘Merica seems to like total luxury vehicles so there is that.
True, but the mom-and-three-sisters-with-a-reality-show-that-I-won’t-name own G Wagons, so as long as I equip the interior as shown with power everything maybe it would stand a chance?
But then you lose manlt man back to basics. I think one of the appeals to back to basic is that it hasn’t had the price run up to the stratosphere with never-ending doodads that are never used.
But then you lose manly man back to basics. I think one of the appeals to back to basic is that it hasn’t had the price run up to the stratosphere with never-ending doodads that are never used.
It’s not the image of ruggedness and capability that make the G desirable amongst the Reality TV/Pro Sports set.
It’s the badge and the pricetag.
I wonder if there will be tipping point coming, where there will be so much luxury/complicated gadgets in cars that the tastemakers will gravitate back towards simplicity, with the market eventually catching up?
The watch world has kinda gone this way – your average mid-market watch can be had with a huge amount of functions and complications (as they call them) that would have been the provenance of rich people only a few decades ago. Which seems to have had the result of making relatively stark and simple high-end watches even more sought after.
“Which seems to have had the result of making relatively stark and simple high-end watches even more sought after.”
Eh, just buy a nice chronograph with a Seagull ST19 movement for $200 and call it a day. I have a few and honestly they’re not that dissimilar to my (original) 1964 Tag Heuer Carerra.
The Timex I’m wearing right now has a Seagull… 🙂
Nice!
At some point I want to track down an example of a Seagull automatic chronograph but I understand those were discontinued for good reason.
the difference there is, the overcomplicated watches likely fell out of style because most of their novel utilities became readily available in a smartphone.
Aesthetic design already swings back and forth between minimalism and maximalism, but I don’t think there’s much real reason for pushback against overcomplication in user experience, or engineering.
For example, a modern CANBUS network is thoroughly intertwined with the infotainment system, the cost of re-engineering the car without it is often more than you would get back in materials & labour, so they’d rather leave it there even if the owner never touches it once. this also goes for parts like the 13-way-adjustable heated-cooled-ventilated-ejecto seats.
As for the mechanical/technical side of things, I could forsee that in ~20 years time a lot of ’20s cars may end up bricked due to software incompatibility, and a bunch of non-critical sensors going bad,
but on the other hand I could also see that these sensors aren’t as unreliable as we fear, and that companies get their arses in gear about QAing their software updates before release.
of course, a lot of this is also motivated by streamlining production, Tesla’s just implemented an ethernet loop in the cybertruck to control just about everything, all in the name of reducing the amount of wiring and connectors needed.
“I could forsee that in ~20 years time a lot of ’20s cars may end up bricked due to software incompatibility”
From OEMs perhaps but as with smartphones there are enthusiasts who can breathe new life to otherwise obsolete devices with a custom OS. Those can end up working better than OEM by dumping all the bloatware.
Is it weird that the evolution of the Patrol was a slow march towards being a half-melted waterlogged bar of soap on wheels?
I know, right? Even though the Land Cruiser turned into the monster 200 series that gets 12MPG (but I can get 18 with the cruise on 75 in our 2009!) it still managed to look like a boxy, industrial machine. I wasn’t even aware that Infiniti was still selling that thing.
Yes please.
I love the 3rd and 4th gen Patrols. The 4th gen was rebadged as a Ford Maverick in Australia: 1990 Ford MAVERICK (4×4) – bulletxr6 – Shannons Club
Memories of a ’91 4 door Pathfinder a college pal had. Great little SUV.
Re the last para, I REALLY want the Bishop to show us what a barebones fun within reason sport coupe would look like today.
Back when, they were often pitched as commuter cars, so they didn’t need a ton of people space, but they often had hatches to provide some hauling capability, frugal engines, and some decent sporty style to make ’em fun. Tape striping optional but encouraged.
So if we’re talking Nissan, I’d love to see what a Pulsar ZX might look like…
Yes, Pulsar NX and I’m also thinking of the first Mitsu Eclipse/Eagle Talon/Plymouth Laser. Great suggestion!
100% agreed they should bring back the Xterra.
There were a couple of years when I was a kid, where we had a real silly tax loophole here (DK) and suddenly the big 3rd generation diesel Patrols were everywhere, along with a lot of Land Cruisers and also some Mitsubishi Pajeros and Daihatsu Rockys, and even a few AROs..
But the Patrol was the manliest of them all! Loved it.
So a “retro” one based on that is welcome here 🙂
(Retro Nissans must be my thing, I also own a Figaro)
This speaks to me. I’m a long time Datsun fan, and a pre-late-90s Nissan fan. I’ve onwed like 6 or 7 720 trucks, a couple of s13s, and multiple Datsun cars. I love old Nissan more than old Toyota by a long shot and have long been sad we didn’t get other gens of the Patrol. My wife has caused me to watch through McCleods Daughters repeatedly, which is slightly painful, but the car watching in that show is great. The veterinarian, Dave, drives an amazing Patrol that I would love to own. But I cannot afford $30K for used, nor can I afford $60K for new. So it doesn’t really matter that I love old patrols and would love to see a new old patrol.
Also, in the category of “is there a market”, I would note the existence of the Ineos Grenadier. Maybe its a bit of extra lux on top of the barebones, but overall, still solid axle back to basics approach to boxy offroader.
As a fan of the Patrol (even the 6th gen Patrol, though I’m slightly less a fan of the US-spec Armada), I’d love to see a return to the boxy designs of old. However, given how Nissan has fallen down the path of being, at best, an also-ran in nearly every category, I don’t think it would be a big seller and would likely further their slow decline towards bankruptcy.
So, you’re suggesting Nissan return to their square roots?
Bishops move in straight lines.