Here’s One Way Car Feature Subscriptions Can Be Good: COTD

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One of the more repulsive quirks of the modern automotive industry is the rise of subscription-based car features. Now, as any subscriber to SiriusXM or OnStar can tell you, this isn’t a new concept. What is different is charging buyers monthly for features their cars already have. BMW got in hot water for this, and now Audi wants to subject its European customers to the same nonsense. But there is one way for subscription services to work.

Thomas gave us the lowdown on what Audi wants European A3 buyers to make payments on. The features that got me was subscribing to dual-zone climate control, adaptive cruise control, and automatic high beams. The hardware is clearly already there and you bought the car, but the features are paywalled like you’re playing GTA Online. Come on, Audi!

I was surprised to see V10omous explain one way to make subscriptions work:

I’m an MBA and I don’t know what luxury means, but I would have set the program up like so:

Subscription features are only offered on leases. They are marketed as discounts from the published lease rate, not as additional subscriptions. Thus if you don’t want Car Play (as I wouldn’t), you can take $19 off the monthly rate or whatever it costs. This feels like customization and gives the customer the illusion of “getting a deal”, even if the end result is exactly the same.

At the end of the lease term, all features are turned on, permanently. This avoids pretty much all the issues noted in the column for second and third owners, and boosts the residuals as well.

If you buy the car outright, either new or at the end of the lease, the features are turned on.

Audi still gets most of their money without the bad press, because most people lease them and most will probably opt to subscribe if the features are opt-out rather than opt-in.

I would be ok with that!

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Last month, I fell in love with a Nissan Rogue. I’m still grappling with that fact, but I continue to stand by my word. It’s not exactly a fun car, nor is it super desirable. But it is a great example of how far base model cars have come! Today, Matt described how you could get a decent deal on a Rogue. As it turns out, so many of you wouldn’t even take a Nissan Rogue for free. StillNotATony delivered an opening salvo:

I do not want a Nissan Rogue
It will never be in vogue.
I do not want one on my street
I would rather use my feet.
I do not want one on my road
I would feel like such a chode.

BoneStock didn’t pull any punches:

If you handed me a Rogue and a cheeseburger I would happily walk off the calories on the way home.

Most of the comments in that article are like those two. Tough crowd! Have a great evening, everyone.

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27 thoughts on “Here’s One Way Car Feature Subscriptions Can Be Good: COTD

  1. The rental Rogue Sport I had a few years back while my car was being worked on was the only modern car I’ve ever driven that I’d describe as dangerously slow. It had trouble merging into 55mph traffic, and fully pressing the pedal to the floor produced a reluctant, wheezy whine but no appreciable increase in speed.

  2. First COTD, thanks Mercedes!! I would like to thank everyone for the briefest of moments in the sun, particularly Nissan for continuing to design and build enthusiast cannon fodder

  3. Haha this is by far my least expected win; it was just a sneaky plan to get Audi 90% of the benefits of the subscription services without annoying a suspicious and cynical public.

    Perhaps the commenters here are not suspicious or cynical enough!

    Or maybe they just don’t lease luxury cars and don’t care that my proposal fleeces those people.

    1. Lease luxury cars? I have a $200 Shitbox Corolla, an 18 year old base model pickup I bought new when pickups were reasonably priced and low enough to load things into the bed without a ladder, a ’74 Buick with no glass, bumpers, or lights with a half finished rattle can paint job, and a scooter. If I sold all of these, it wouldn’t pay for a two year lease on an A4, which … Ewww.

    2. It’s a good idea, but I can’t imagine dealers would advertise anything other than the rock bottom, no subscriptions price, then increase it when you decide you want things like working door locks or to raise the speed limiter beyond 45.

    1. Alternatively, all commenters are automatically entered into the drawing and we see how many actively reach out to remove ourselves from the running.

        1. The contest should be not to win one. The winner does not win a Rogue and is thus better off then the rest of us who have been saddled with Rogues that we now have to deal with.

        1. Reminds me of the old joke:

          A backpacker walks into a bar in Ireland to find an old man sitting alone. He and the old man get to talking. The old man says,” you see this bar? I cut the trees, milled the lumber, and built it with my own bare hands. But do they call me McGreggor the bar builder? No. That wall over there? I quarried the stone and placed each one. Am I McGreggor the wall builder? No. And that pier. It was all my doing, but am I McGreggor the pier builder?” He’s silent for a few moments before he mutter, “but ya fuck one goat…”

          Not that I’m equating owning a Rogue with bestiality… that would be unfair to the “animal lovers” out there.

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