How To Choose What Car To Drive: COTD

Cotd I3 Cybertruck
ADVERTISEMENT

Owning multiple cars presents enthusiasts with perhaps the silliest of first-world problems. How do you decide what car to drive each day? For me, the choice is pretty easy. If the weather is good, I choose a motorcycle. If the weather is crummy or I need to take a lot of gear with me, I choose a car that is the most legal, most operable, and best suited for the trip I’m taking.

This subject came up because David Tracy had a Tesla Cybertruck for the weekend, yet he still preferred his BMW i3. Some people have a whole decision tree to choose what car to drive, like Sid Bridge:

Hadn’t thought too much about this, but a lot of stuff does go through my mind when choosing between my daily 1993 Miata, my 1980 Spitfire or my 1968 Olds 4-4-2.

Do I need A/C today?
Is it going to rain on me?
Do I want people to look at my car and say loud things at me?
Do I want 12 MPGs or 26?
Do I want 75HP or 400?
Do I want to shift gears or… um… shift gears. Ok. Lemme rewrite that:
Do I want to sublime-Miata-shift gears or vaguely-Triumph-shift gears or Rock-Crush Muncie-shift gears?
Which garage is blocked by the Odyssey? Do I care enough to move the Odyssey?
Is something about to break on any of these cars?
What do I want to smell like today?
Do I have to pick a kid up? Do they fit in the trunk?
Does my band have a gig in which case NONE of these cars work and I need to steal my wife’s Odyssey?
Do I want to get the side-eye from a cop?
Do I want to get the side-eye from a bro?
Do I want to get the side-eye from someone who hates the British?
Do I want to get the side-eye from an environmentalist?
Do I want to get the side-eye from an Olds enthusiast that knows my car is a clone?
Do I need to wake any kids up with engine noise from the garage?
Do I want to listen to the radio? Do I want to be able to hear said radio?
Oh shoot, do I need to be at the airport? Do I want to leave this car in an airport garage three days?
Do I want people to go “Awww!” or “AW YEAH!”?

Admittedly, most of the time I end up driving my 2010 Volkswagen Jetta SportWagen TDI, the Volkswagen Phaeton, or one of the motorcycles. Earlier today, Thomas wrote about all of the cars you can currently score zero percent financing on. If you aren’t a fan of crossovers, I have bad news because almost all of the cars on the list are crossovers. The exception to the rule is the Subaru WRX.

Canopysaurus is harsh:

Unfortunately, I have zero percent interest in any of these cars.

Jason wrote about a guy who seemed rather happy that he was driving a car with potentially thousands of bees only inches from his head. You lovely readers did what you do best with bee humor.

Canopysaurus again:

I’d have gotten out of the car immediately because – like the Monkees – I’m a bee leaver.

Then there’s this unbeelievable pun thread:

Chronometric:

Driving while buzzed is a crime.

Goof:

Way to bee a buzzkill.

Sid Bridge:

This thread is just gonna drone on.

10001010:

It’s giving me hives.

Sid Bridge:

Tell me about it, honey.

Phantom Pedal Syndrome:

Who doesn’t love free-bees.
No need to wax on about it.

I’ve been out for the past few days, so that gives me the right to make you all winners today! Have a great evening, everyone!

About the Author

View All My Posts

12 thoughts on “How To Choose What Car To Drive: COTD

  1. Probably need to add this to your resume, LinkedIn profile, mention it in any cover letter, and bring it up, unprompted, in conversations weekly for the next 10-20 years.

  2. I’m printing this page out, marching into my boss’s office and demanding a promotion.
    This is somehow relevant to my life in the bowels of real estate investment, isn’t it?

  3. How to choose…
    Do I want the car to start? Well then the Pug is out.
    Do I want my wife to be mad at me? Well I guess I’m not taking her van.
    Then I look at the Cruze disdainfully and begrudgingly drive it to work yet again.

Leave a Reply