A clever and funny friend of mine once told me that she calls groups of Honda Fits, seen in parking lots or roaming free in the wild, a conniption of Fits. This delighted me, so I’m going to repay her cleverness by stealing this idea and running with it for my own personal gain, in this very post right here. Why don’t we have clever names for groups of particular cars? Why do crows with their murders and lions with their prides and rhinos with their crashes get all the fun? They shouldn’t, those smug-ass animals. Time to give groups of cars a chance!
So, with that in mind, we’ve come up with a bunch of names for groups of kinds of cars. Some are specific models, some are entire brands, it just depends. And, we’ve tried to keep this upbeat and pro-car, because our publisher Matt yelled at me when I suggested a Douche of Teslas or an Insecurity of Lamborghinis. So, for the most part I’ll try to make these non-derogatory, but I’m kind of a jerk sometimes, so some might slide in.
Like this one:
But I mean, come on, we can’t be offending any Vega owners, right? They knew what they got into. Anyway, I’ll try to be nice.
All the Autopians contributed to this list, and in that spirit, I absolutely encourage everyone to add more in the comments! This is just a start, and there’s so many more car groups to name! Here we go:
A Conniption of Honda Fits
An Infestation of VW Beetles
A Smugness of Priuses
A Tragedy of Yugos
A Cult of Teslas
A Ring of Saturns
A Clutch of Mazda Miatas
A Dent of Camrys
A Compromise of Corollas
A Stereo Of Nissan Jukes
A Vegas of Dodge Neons
A Lecture of Saabs
A Crunch of Subarus
A Crew of Ford F-150s
A Battalion of Jeeps
A Den of Vipers
A Levee of Chevys
A Headache of Alfa Romeos
An Illusion of Mitsubishi Mirages
An Afterlife of Kia Souls
A Militia of Toyota Hiluxes
An Eternity of Toyotas
A Wank of Mazda RX7s (for Wankel, I promise)
A Keg of Mopars
A Disrespect of Chrysler PT Cruisers
A Hospice of Buicks
A Corruption of Ladas
A Squad of Ford Crown Vics
A Paddock of Porsche 911s
A Target of Toyota RAV4s
A Pub of Minis
A Manor of Bentleys
An Emancipation of Lincolns
A Mullet of Camaros
A Recession Of Nissan Versas
An Oddment of Citroëns
A Desperation of Daewoos
A Depreciation of Maseratis
An Impossibility of Cybertrucks
An Ordnung of Mercedes-Benzes
A Burnout of Ford Mustangs
A Regret of Fisker Karmas
A Surprise of Fiat 500 Abarths
A Fireball of Ford Pintos
A Humility of Renault 4s
A Masquerade of Mitsuokas
A Shock of Chevy Volts
A Kindergarten of BMWs
An Instagram of Chargers (Matt says “Because all of them have those fucking handles on their cars”)
A Garden of Lotuses
An Impound of Nissan Skylines
An Ouroboros of Infinitis
A Wrath of Plymouth Furys
A Lounge of Buick Rivieras
A Buffet of Chevy Cruzes (you know, like on a cruise? Patrick didn’t get this.)
A Confusion of Fiat Multiplas
A Hilarity of AMC Pacers
A Shitload of SUVs
(from our Australian):
A Mang of V6 Holden Commodores
A Crate of Australian AU Ford Falcons
As a former, and soon to be future, BMW owner I’d like to suggest a Douchebag of Bimmers.
A Box of Volvos; only applies to pre-2000s models of course.
A traffic of cars
Karen of Caravans
Jerk of BMWs
Puddle of Jeeps
Squat of Silverardos
Default of Altimas
Karen of Caravans yields an Olivia of Odysseys and a Sarah of Siennas.
An Excitement of Pontiacs!
A Dictatorship of Studebakers
A flash of TTs.
This one made me giggle.
Nice!
Is that more or less than a handful?
A Delusion of Overlanders.
Starting with the generic:
-A jam of daily drivers
-A garage of queens
Getting specific:
-A Tracy of tractors
-A Streeter of campers (or buses)
*See what I did on the last one…
A Roundup of Mavericks
A Measurement of V.W. Beetle’s.
Q: What do you call a group of VW Beetles?
A: A measurement.
May be repeating others:
a honor of Integras
a youth of Giulias
a steep of stelvio
a empire of Enclaves
a ladder of Escalades
a bright of Blazers
a HOA of Suburbans
a contender of Challengers
a sting of Hornets
a wrangle of Broncos
a coulee of Canyons
a plain of Sierras
a treaty of Accords
a visa of Passports
a stockade of Palisades
a locale of Venues
a circumference of Compasses
a rebel of Renegades
a gala of Carnivals
a essence of Souls
a disclosure of Discoverys
a spiral of Nautilus’s
a illusion of Mirages
a rascal of Rogues
a colossus of Titans
a burn of Cayennes
a heirloom of Legacies
a thorn of Crowns
a expanse of Tundras
a volume of Atlas’
a divot of Golfs
“A wank of Mazda Miatas” works better, though—for reasons NOT related to the wankel engine.
A Stain of Harley Davidsons
A Counterpoint of Crossover’s.
A Commitment of Camaro’s.
I can’t stop. But gotta go walk the dogs now.
Should be fun peanut gallery reading in the morning though.
This is great!
I’m pretty sure it’s coven of Subaru
Well played, got to it before I did!
A Pudendum of Volvos?
A Curmudgeon of Cadillac’s.
A Pile of Pontiac’s.
Not that good… But someone has to do it.
A herd of impalas
A Procrastination of Prizm’s.
A PUDDLE of MGs
A Ring of Opels
A FONDUE of Volvos
A Chafing of Fulvias
A Daedalus of Del Sol’s.
A Supervisor of Sebring’s.