As you may have noticed, there’s been a trend in modern automotive design where beltlines have been getting higher and greenhouses have been getting lower, making windows wider and longer but shorter. This can give cars and SUVs a more solid, even somewhat menacing look, perhaps inspired by old custom car “lead sled” designs, and while I know this is a generally popular look, there is one largely overlooked victim of this design trend: the rear window wiper. The proportions of rear windows on many modern SUVs is such that the only wipers that will actually fit in the limited vertical space are tiny — even absurdly tiny — ones. Compared to the bulk of the rest of the vehicle, they look even more absurd, and, even worse, they don’t function well, being only able to wipe bagel-sized arcs on the rear glass. It’s silly, so let’s do a bit of healthy pointing and mocking. And I’ll also make a suggestion on how automakers can end this scourge.
The new Chevy Blazer is one of the most obvious examples of this goofball trend. Just look at that crazy baby wiper sitting there in the middle of the tailgate. Is it even big enough to be left alone on the back of the car like that? It looks to be about the size of the wipers on my Beetle, only here it’s on a car about quadruple the size and bulk. It’s like a knight in full armor brandishing one of those cocktail toothpicks shaped like a sword. It just feels silly.
Then there’s the actual utility, which is about as pathetic as the looks are. Here, check it out:
That’s not a hell of a lot of window to clear with that dinky little wiper, this time on a recent Jeep Grand Cherokee L. If someone is sitting in the middle of the back seat, they’d obscure all your cleared area. Near-vertical rear windows on SUVs get dirty! A wiper is supposed to be useful! And the Jeeps could be if it could clear an area bigger than the circumference of a personal pan pizza.
[Editor’s Note: At first I called this a Cherokee, and then David, of all people, told me it was a Wagoneer! We were both wrong! Crap. – JT]
Just to compare, look at some other SUVs from a few years back, that didn’t have this issue:
Those wipers both don’t look like they’ve just stepped out of a cold shower, and they actually clean a lot of window area. The Mercedes-Benz up top pre-dates the low greenhouse trend, so it has more vertical room to exist, while the BMW below it takes a clever approach, where the glass continues up at an angle behind the rear spoiler, giving the look of the lower greenhouse while simultaneously providing enough vertical area for a longer, more useful wiper.
(Also, I like how the reflection of that airplane in the window is right there by the wiper)!
I’m not just here to complain; I have a solution! That’s what I do, remember, turning on the headlights of reason instead of cursing the darkness. This can be solved in a way that keeps all the styling intact while making the wipers make more visual sense for their small size, as well as providing more usable window-clearing ability. By simply doing this:
Multiple wipers! When paired up, the tiny wipers don’t look so ridiculous, and they now clear a much more usable window area! Just look:
Everyone wins! And before you start kvetching to me about extra cost or whatever, let me remind you that somehow Toyota pulled this off decades ago:
The Camry Wagon wasn’t some hyper-expensive luxury car, and it had two rear wipers, because Toyota knew that was the best solution for the task. [Editor’s Note: It’s not clear to me exactly why this Toyota even needed two rear wipers in the first place! -DT]. Chevy can add another wiper to the Blazer and keep it out of Bentley price territory, I’m pretty sure.
Stupidly tiny rear SUV wipers are a blight on our once-proud nation, but it won’t take much to fix this. Just add another wiper and make us proud to look at the back of our SUVs once again. Little wipers, like all of us, just need a buddy to be at their best.
You think the tiny wipers are bad?
What I see all the time is the tiny wipers STILL IN THEIR ORIGINAL PLASTIC BAG. As in, the wiper is there flush against the rear windscreen, and the bag is still on the wiper arm.
Why? Why do I see this on some vehicle at least ONCE A WEEK?!
Many car washes put bags on them. I’m more the DIY spray the mud/slush off type, so I couldn’t tell you why.
I think the Mercedes Benz uni wiper should be brought back to solve this issue. Unlike the body-rocking front wiper on the Merc, the rear wiper would only need to move intermittently so it wouldn’t feel as dramatic and it could easily cover a decent area.
How do you think the Cybertruck is doing it??? Whoops, inside scoop. Fire me ELON!!!
Once again this is where the genius of the BXD20 megacruiser sines a light on the failures of today.
https://opposite-lock.com/topic/68198/roll-call-for-cars-with-more-or-fewer-than-2-wipers-on-the-front-windshield/8?_=1684886700183
Why stop at 2 wipers?
That’s the only positive thing I can say about my old MGB, it had a very clean windshield. The roof leaked so all the water those wipers were moving ended up in my lap but at least the windshield was clean.
Just put a wiper on the damn rear camera and that’s all you need.
/s
Sienna is the worst. It’s tucked under the spoiler so to change the (tiny) blade you have to dance with the start/switch with amazing timing. It also doesn’t match the curve so the bottom of the arc never gets cleared, and it only covers about 20% of the glass.
DUAL EXHAUST DUAL WIPERS OR NOTHING BABY
Oldsmobile 4422
I have a feeling those that say rear wipers are not necessary do not live in an area that gets any snow. Because yes, you damn well need a rear wiper on a hatchback, wagon and SUV from all the road grime and spray that gets kicked up when driving on the highway during and after a snowstorm. I have a Golf and an Audi Allroad that both need these things at least three months out of the year. That being said, I’ve run across some aftermarket “wiper delete” kits for the Golf Mk7 set. I have no idea why’d you’d go through the trouble.
It’s the same reason my dad (in Florida) couldn’t understand how I ran out of wiper fluid during a two-week snow event in Portland, or why it was a big deal that the stores were sold out, or why they were.
This assumes that once the window is clear, you can actually see out of it. The belt lines have grown, roof lines have dropped, and headrests are gigantic; the rear window and mirror might as well not exist anymore, as the latter will just block forward visibility. Even Polestar realized this and the upcoming 4 doesn’t have a rear window at all, which is honestly fine by me
Hudson offered an optional rear window wiper and even back then it seems like they should have considered finding room for a second one somehow:
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/b/ba/1950_Hudson_Commodore_four-door_sedan_at_2021_Macungie_show_2of5.jpg/1920px-1950_Hudson_Commodore_four-door_sedan_at_2021_Macungie_show_2of5.jpg
Seems this discussion is sorely lacking the Flaminia’s double interior and exterior rear wipers!
https://live.staticflickr.com/4354/36850297790_a39a0b9d94_b.jpg
They don’t call it the Italian Rolls Royce for nothing!
I do enjoy the two wiper concept, HOWEVER can I also raise the possibility of something akin to the W124 ‘Monoblade’? (for the name alone)
It would work in reverse! Extended at rest position, retracts during arc!
We need something like the linear-tracking wiper on the Minority Report Lexus. https://www.allcarindex.com/concept/japan/lexus/2054-minority-report-concept/
This is a good idea for this problem.
You could even keep the tracks inside the body so they don’t get gunked up, by using The Power of Magnets to connect the exterior blade to an interior arm.
Similar to how a magnetic aquarium cleaner works.
The stupid thing is that while front wipers keep getting longer as the windshields get larger and more raked, rear window wipers keep getting shorter.
So we have a ton of 24-29 inchers in the store now, as well as a metric ass-ton of different styles in the 8-12 inch range, because of course each OEM has to have a different way of attaching a rear wiper to the arm.
Are tiny rear wipers better than a bidet?
Take my upvote *shakes fist*
Seriously though, let’s just have some powerful spray jets and forget the wiper!
Thats a Grand Cherokee L, not a Wagoneer.
Wagoneers dont say Jeep on them.
The MINI clubman had 2 wipers too, from 2008
So did the Transit Connect, because barn doors.
No, that’s the FJ Cruiser’s front wipers that you’re thinking of.
https://i.redd.it/fcgt3li7omd21.jpg
Some MGBs had 3 wipers as well.
Speaking of, where is 3WiperB?
Polestar said, lets remove the whole rear window lol
Well on the bright side: if this trend continues, at some point I’ll be able to interchange GM rear window wipers with my Saab’s headlight wipers. Think of the savings!
Is the rear wiper even necessary?
I don’t drive SUVs much, but I from driving hatchbacks with a similar shape, I have noticed that the rear window doesn’t get wet when driving through rain at highway speed. The airflow seems to suck the water right off it.
As for dirt, you can easily give it a quick squeegee at the gas station or at home. That’s not a problem that needs to be dealt with immediately while driving.
Not to mention, what are you even seeing out of those tiny rear windows anyway? They had to make backup cameras mandatory because these things are so useless. The rear wiper is just a trinket, a frivolous add-on to make the car seem more “premium”.
This is the weirdest take I’ve read all day, especially considering high end manufacturers are working as hard as possible to hide their rear wipers (see Range Rover, Escalade, etc.) and Hyundai Group decided to just omit them on the E-GMP cars for aero and design purposes. Who looks at a rear wiper and says, ‘mmm, now that’s high-end!’
Came here to say this. I don’t really understand the obsession with rear window wipers, in particular because they rarely get used, seldom replaced when worn out, and no one has sufficiently explained to me why, if they’re such a great idea, sedans don’t also have them.
It depends on the angle of the rear window on necessary they are. My 2018 Elantra GT was built in such a way that the rear tires kicked up water/dirt from the pavement to the rear window. The rear wiper became absolutely necessary for any visibility during rainy days.
Similar experience with the 2nd gen Prius. Its rear glass angles upwards so it catches the rain, making the wiper handy.
Really any hatch or wagon would benefit from a rear wiper unless it has a flat rear pane and nothing kicking up into it.
I always use the rear wiper. Water gets on the rear window not only from rain but from a wet road spray after it rains. Besides giving me good visibility out the back, using the rear wiper keeps my rear dashcam image clear.
Also if you live in dusty places like I do it’s way easier to just spray the rear window and get a clear swept area than to find a gas station and borrow their squeegee. Considering I get gas at Costco, I can’t think of the last time I touched a gas station squeegee.
EVs don’t stop at gas stations. Time for the charger at home to come with a complimentary squeegee to differentiate it.
My extremely non-premium Kia Soul has a rear wiper that it absolutely needs if I want to see what’s going on behind me when there is snow, rain, or any moisture on the road.
The real solution is a Mercedes W124 mono wiper.
Mono wipe is the solution for everything in life.
I had a ’98 XJ8 with one wiper, and it was simple and effective. In order to keep up with the rain though the wipe speed was so high the outer end would fling water completely off the car.
I had an Isuzu Impulse with one 22″ wiper, and it was the same thing. Pretty good when at low or medium speed, but on high, water would just fly and you could hear the motor from inside the car just screaming.
Owned an Isuzu Impulse, loved that car! It fell apart but still. Also, don’t stand to the side of the car when the wiper is going, you’ll get soaked.
Laundry day must be an interesting time in your home.
Isn’t that a collision thing? (Not to be confused with SoM’s Vision Thing.) I thought recent safety guidelines encouraged (required?) higher beltlines for better side impact protection or similar.
I kind of like the idea of having two wipers, but there would need to be a decently-sized overlap area, or the pilot will have clear spots either side of the center and schmutz in the middle.
It’s always in my mind seemed to dovetail at a really bad time – consumer interest in more “mean” styling (b/c cars were just too nice and a No Fear decal + chain license plate frame could only do so much) combined with larger and larger vehicles leading to a more dangerous environment which meant more strict regulation.
I miss the ’90s when things could still be occasionally fun instead of edgy all the time.
Don’t forget the punisher skull…. My cars don’t have that sticker.
Shoutout to the Toyota FJ Cruisers TRIPLE front wipers.
If they move the pivot mount down to the metal, they could easily have a longer blade that reaches wider. It’s like they are all drawn to the glasshole.
Who you callin’ glasshole?
Ya fargin bastage!
+1 for any Johnny Dangerously reference. Hey, did you know your name is an adverb?
YES, 100% YES. This has been such a stupid design decision for a while now.
Also, all rear wipers should swoop down from the top and be hidden from view in their parked position. Some brands do this well, but the wipers are still too small. Shit, I bet the headlight wipers on a Volvo are almost the same size as the rear wiper on the worst offender(s).