It might not be one of the Top Ten Most Shit Upon Cars, but if we expand that number by a few dozen or so I am sure that the poor Porsche 914 would make the list.
Lambasted by many so-called “Porschephiles,” its identity was clouded from the beginning. The fact that it was sold as a “VW-Porsche” in Europe only solidifies this confusion and gives you a hint of its troubled lineage. Ostensibly meant to replace both the Volkswagen Karmann Ghia AND the Porsche 912 (a 911 with a four cylinder engine, at first from the Porsche 356, then the VW Type 4), it was sold only as a Porsche in the United States. In these years before Cayennes and Panameras were considered normal, the idea of anything other than a rear engine coupe being branded by Stuttgart’s maker of sports machines was seen as a true travesty.
[Editor’s note: We at The Autopian think the Porsche 914 is perfect the way it is, but let’s see what Porsche could have done to please many of the early design critics. -DT].
This is a bit of shame, because in many ways the 914 is an outstanding design. It’s a paragon of space efficiency with sizable trunks front and rear combined with mid-engined handling.
This targa-topped car was not going to leak like a sieve as a contemporary British car might. In everything from build quality to the overengineered pop-up headlights, it put cars like the Fiat X 1/9 to shame. The Boxster and current 718 honestly owe much of their design layout to this Karmann-built forebearer. Like most cars on the Shit List, there’s plenty to love.
As much as I want to completely counter the haters, admittedly the 914 ain’t perfect. The VW Type 4 powerplant wasn’t particularly powerful even for the time, though it’s not like the direct competitors were drastically quicker (other than the vehicle that more or less put nails in the coffin of affordable British and Italian sports cars- the 240Z).
The biggest issue with the 914 really seems to be the styling, which was never universally praised and often disliked. Admittedly much of the public was never going to warm to a ‘Porsche’ that looked nothing like a 911, but it’s worse than that. There’s too many odd details that set your teeth on edge; even if it were considered a VW, it lacked the charm or cohesiveness of the Karmann Ghia. This was also from an era where many manufacturers (like Lotus) had yet to come to grips with styling a mid-engined car, and it shows.
What about an alternate reality where we can solve these issues? Correct the wrongs of half a century ago? Let’s take a look.
In retrospect, let’s say that Porsche just continued to make the 912; they’d put a VW 411 motor in back of the 911 and sell that as an entry level car. This seems like a sound idea since it’s something that Porsche actually did with the one-year-only 912E when the 914 was dumped in 1975 and the replacement car wasn’t ready yet (the 924, another Shit List car but one that is arguably more deserving of the status). I’ve never seen ones like below without the Fuchs ‘cookie cutter’ wheels:
In addition, the chunky bumpers and giant light clusters really did no favors to the last of the Karmann Ghias that VW kept selling through the early seventies, another case of modern fittings really dating a car.
The 914 could have been the replacement for this now long-in-the-tooth coupe, albeit now called something like the ‘Karmann GT’. It could no longer be a ‘Ghia’ since by that time the styling house responsible for the original design was a subsidiary of Ford.
Now that we’ve solved the naming issue, what about the styling? There were a number of show cars created that rebodied the 914. Guigiaro’s Tapiro looked exactly like what you would expect from him; an Esprit-like angular wedge that unfortunately appeared far too Italian exotic to ever be a German car.
The 914 Murene added a fastback and, from many angles, looked a bit more awkward than the original:
But why throw the existing car out? What if we just did some tweaking to the original car’s design? Surprisingly, a few relatively small changes seem to transform it tremendously.
One of the most objectionable elements of the 914 is that it’s one of the few cars I can think of with front tail fins, which I guess are now “front fins”? They stick out of the fenders and are finished off with turn signals that make them appear a bit like bunny ears. In addition, the 914 had wraparound taillights that incorporated side markers, but the lights up front did not, necessitating stuck-on round lamps that looked a bit like something you’d pay a dermatologist to cut from your face.
_-_9579225634.jpg){kind=link}
Next, this is the first (and hopefully last) Porsche with a vinyl roof like on a Chevy; the black material is stuck onto the side pillar to unsuccessfully try to hide it.
You can see on cars with the vinyl removed like below, it looks no better; the incongruent looking targa bar really stands out and appears to be something a giant hand could use to lift the vehicle. The rear deck also seems to be aircraft-carrier big from most angles.
Let’s bust out Photoshop and see what could be done differently on our now-Volkswagen coupe, the Karmann GT.
First, we will trim off the ‘bunny ears’ and smooth out the top of the nose. On the lower fascia, we’ll add turn signals to sort of match the wraparound taillights in back for a cohesive look (they’d include the side markers, of course). I know that the 5MPH bumper regulations would eventually require a black rubber replacement in the all-important US market. We’ll also modify the nose a bit more with a chrome bumper and ‘nostrils’ that are a bit of an abstract continuation of the ones on the Karmann Ghia predecessor.
You can see that the front end is almost like the original Ghia turned upside down:
.jpg/1200px-Volkswagen_Karmann-Ghia_Type_14_coupe_(6106019298).jpg){kind=link}
In back, there’s a reason that mid-engined cars add “sail panels”; you need to visually connect the roof to the rear deck to prevent the whole thing from looking like a pickup truck (or breadvan in the case of the Lotus Europa). We’ll gently slope the sides down with a shape that complements the nose. The obtuse pillars can be softened by some glazing; we can add a window that sits off of the steel “roll hoop: (needed to support the targa top and actually act as protection for passengers if the shiny side ends up on the bottom). The window would visually fill the space and also add a subtle nod to the old Ghia.
Alternatively, we could cover the roll bar in louver-vents I’ve shown. In both cases, there would be slots or vents for engine air intakes which are lacking on the original car. If such air scoops were offered by JC Whitney for the 914 they’d claim it would add 20 horsepower. The top of the B pillar interfacing with the roof panel could use a bit more resolution but you get the idea.
That’s it. I’m rather shocked at the transformation; even with the wheels from the VW Group’s cheapest car, the whole thing takes on a more exotic sports car look while still keeping a Teutonic character.
Another change on the inside. With the flat interior floor, German designers decided to put this padded lump between the seats that I am assuming they figured zee kinder wouldn’t mind sitting on. As a GenXer, I was unfortunately one of those kinder; and we DID mind, thank you. The parents of one of my friends had a 914 and NONE of us wanted to sit on that fucking thing.
The 914 is only a few inches narrower than the Matra Bagheera which famously featured three real seats across (by the way, look at those window cranks!!).
Come on Volkswagen, if it’s meant to be a seat, make it a seat like in the image below right. Below on the right is the Karmann GT interior with the three-wide seating (but otherwise unchanged except for the Type 4 steering wheel). Oh, and the gear lever is pushed a bit to the left. Sure, a bit of a tight squeeze but beats riding on the trunk lid:
Porsche family member Ferdinard Piech apparently was lead on the 914 project. He had 13 kids, who I am assuming he was trying to constantly punish.
Would this otherwise unaltered car now be seen as a relative attractive and worthy successor to a lovely-looking-but-not-too-sporting Volkswagen instead of viewed as a rather awkward looking pretender with a Porsche badge?
I’d venture to say that it would at least get it off of the Shit List, where it really never belonged.
Our Daydreaming Designer Imagines Corvette Sedan And Wagon In 1978 – The Autopian
A Daydreaming Designer Imagines An AMC Sports Car Based On The Look Of The Pacer – The Autopian
The Porsche 914’s Pop-Up Headlights Had A Grisly Secret – The Autopian
I’ve always hated those front wing lights on the 914. The Rover P6 also has them, and they’re just as horrible with british panel gaps as with german… Luckily they never really caught on.
The sail panel windows, a bit like on the Ferrari 208/308 GT4 and more like the Fiero GT are a really good idea! Actually Pontiac did all those right things to the GT and got a much more beautiful car than the original goofy looking 2M4.
Flat floor is typical french and much easier to place 3 front seat on. Porsche and VW always had that center tunnel, which would be hard and expensive to offset to the left. German gear linkage rods, protected by that tunnel, lasts forever, but the thin french ones running on the underside of the car wasn’t really a priority obviously. I have tried crawling down and reaching in and reconnection some worn french ones in a “I have no gears” crisis situation once..
But good job! Looks so much better (thumbs up emoji)
Would love a Matra-Simca Bagheera at some time, but since there’s not many of them, and it looks best in the early model years, my centre engined pop-up lights car built in strange materials is probably going to be a Fiero GT 🙂
The “SP2” front end you came up with matches the car perfectly, and now I wish we lived in a reality where Porsche took over that project…
Anyway, it is also a shame that the Tapiro didn’t make the cut, the thing looked amazing (at least in that one photo).
I’m actually rather fond of the 914. It’s unpretentious and a bit funky.
That said, I really like the front you did, Bishop. Much cleaner, and I’m a sucker for a nice clean arc of chrome. Not much you can do with the sail panel-it’s just awkward. But the louvers version speaks to my childhood. Well, done, man.
And I fucking want the window cranks from that Bagheera!
Those window cranks are awesome! Since there seems to be a new generation who appreciate manual transmissions those window cranks could be a hit. “Check it out, I don’t have to turn on the car to operate the windows. Really!”
FUCK the haters! The 914 is awesome 😀
Bishop I appreciate the attempt to improve the 914, I think you have had some success with it, but can’t help but think it is turd polishing in this case. There really is no fixing it, just let time do it’s softening work on this VW – Porsche design.
It’s definitely less like a transistor radio (Brock Yates’ description of a 914 in Sunday Driver) and more like a 911. I will say that a sail panel with a window is a Fiero GT feature, now you can’t unsee that
You added a buttress to the 914 and created the Miata RF. Oh yeah, I will throw every opportunity to say I own one of these cars and it’s the best
tygermind- I agree! I like buttresses and I cannot lie.
The 914 was the most attractive Porsche until the 2004 Carrera GT. I have never liked the squashed Beetle look of the 911 (any generation), and never really warmed up to the Boxter/Cayman. I found the 924/944 styling to be inoffensive but not not attractive, and I was shocked and appalled that the 928’s resemblance to a Pacer was freaking intentional. I rage-puked the first time I saw a 928 in real life, and I cheered when the one in Risky Business ended up in Lake Michigan.
I’m going to need the argument behind “The 924 more belongs on the Shit List than does the 914.” Because, no.
Happy Walters- Note that I said ‘arguably’, and I am referring to the early cars and NOT the later 1986-1988 924S with the balance shaft 944 engine.
The statement is based on options and first-hand accounts of people I know that owned both new in period. Their reasons included serious electrical issues, horrible interior parts quality (dashes cracked in just a few years), fuel system issues with the EA831, and poor performance relative to the extremely high price (even compared to the 914). Again, just opinions but they spoke from experience.
Conceptually, the 924 was obviously good as shown by the much, much improved later 944/968.
Your rendition is a 914 if it were designed and built by the French.
Careful what you say about the Fiat X1/9. That was as far as I read.
Dave- you can keep reading, it’s safe. I just said that the 914 likely had better build quality. Nothing else. I actually dig the X1/9, and in terms of the styling and funky interior I like it far more than the Porsche.
Whew. My X1/9 is my favorite car. Great to drive and not bad to work on.
Interesting exercise, but I still come down on the side of the original, probably because I’m of the same vintage. This is my favorite Porsche. I’m not arguing it’s the best Porsche (or 2nd, 3rd, etc.), it’s just the one I like the best. I got some extensive driver’s seat time in a 914 during college and it was the most fun I ever had in a car (as long as we limit activities to driving). But what do I know, I liked the VW Thing and the Fiat X1/9, too.
I don’t like it.
Gonna go look at Dad’s 914-6 to get the taste of that out of my brain.
No, no, no. Do not change the look of it. I had the 2.0 liter in eyeball burning yellow. It was and is handsome and wonderful to look at as it is. When I saw an orange one on the streets of London in 1970 I fell in love. Yes the /6 is cooler, and yes it is 4,5,6 times as expensive. Use your 914 morph magic on an x19
The Porsche 914 was the worst Porsche, but this helps. However, this still looks like a TR7 got drunk on room temperature pub ale* and convinced an unwitting Porsche to come home with it. Aaaand 9 months later…
*Full disclosure: I enjoy British pub ales, at any temperature.
Man With A Reliable Jeep- Brits think we’re fools for serving beer so cold. But then they have Lucas refrigerators (yes I know that’s an old joke).
I’m Britsh. In my 20+ years of drinking in pubs all over the UK I have never once had a warm beer. And I’m the sort of ignorant drinker who walks up to a bar and orders “a beer”, so it’s not like I haven’t been served some unusual, disgusting but icy-cold crap in a pint glass.
We have so many other horrific things to mock: the unforgivable colonialism, the tattered remains of the class system, the repugnant need to give away free healthcare. And the terrible cars. So many terrible cars.
Anyway: the 914 has the worst possible flying buttresses. Thank you for fixing them.
I have been all over Britain and I too have always been served refreshingly cool ales. It isn’t ice cold but it isn’t warm. In the old days, pub beer was pumped up manually (pulled) from the cellar which is always cool.
I think the rear window is a good idea, but I feel like you added a little too much swoop and curve to it – the car in general and the other frames in particular are more angular, with slighter, more implied curves that feature fairly hard corners.
And yes, I know the original had a fairly strong inverse swoop, but that particular design detail was incongruent with the rest of the car, and part of why it looked so off.
I just want to know when did Stef travel back in time to do promotional shoots for Porsche?
actually just putting a Ghia top on the 914 wedge helps a bunch. https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v136/TeamEvil/914ghia-1.jpg
JDE- yes, that does! That’s basically what I did; I just wanted to stretch it back a little to get rid of the giant rear decklid.
Feels like that would be problematic with the mid-engine design of the 914, but damn, that does look a lot better.
The hard rear bench with no headroom in a Ghia were never really useful for anything, so you might as well put the engine there..
I like what you did to the frontend, but there’s no fixing the B-pillar situation. To me, adding glass just makes it worse.
I hated them, I still do. 80 HP, not a truly convertible “sports” car, though targas do seem to work ok on other porsche models. the green house box ratio tot he other boxes is off. That onee thing alone would have helped a bunch and just added more frunk space.
Honestly they could have just placed a 911 nose onto the existing Karmann Ghia, saved a bunch on tooling and had much improved style to carry them through the 70’s. let the wedges come in the early eighties like everything else.
“Editor’s note: We at The Autopian think the Porsche 914 is perfect the way it is”
This is the correct take – thank you.
The modified pic of the mustard-colored 914 is giving me Ferrari Dino vibes.
“The VW Type 4 powerplant wasn’t particularly powerful even for the time”
That’s fair, although there is now a dizzying array of build and tuning options for the type IV. Put some more ponies in your Porsche!
A. Barth- I know someone that did a Weber conversion to the thing and it indeed made it into something much more than the engine we had in our 1973 VW 412 station wagon.
That does not surprise me. 🙂
A long time ago I had a Super Beetle with a built 1835 and Weber 48IDAs, and have been a fan ever since. Even some Mopar guys are using three 2bbl side-drafts on modified slant-6 engines.
I have a 2056cc Type 4 (with many, many modifications and $$$ spent) that makes an honest 150hp on the dyno. It’s in my ’69 912 and that car is now actually “fast” and sounds amazing through the dual 44IDF Webers.
A friend had a “slant nose” 914 (similar front end to what’s proposed visually) with a stroked 2270cc Type 4 that was an absolute rocket.
Wow, you’re squeezing 150 ponies out of a type 4 engine? That’s awesome. Must be a hoot to drive 🙂 how much power was your friend’s 914 putting out? An engine that big in a tiny MR car sounds a bit like a death trap, but I can’t say it doesn’t sound interesting 😉
Gott dang, that kind of power is the DREAM.
I’ve got a 1.8 Type 4 from a 914 in my 411 right now, and it’s adequate, but……….oh, the temptation to do something meatier to it is there, and real.
Well, get on in there! It’s not going to modify itself. 🙂
Also, 914 folks are suuuuuuper helpful with troubleshooting and advice! Even when your Type 4 is in a VW Type 4.
I owned a 914 (as well as a 912) and loved that car. Yes, they rusted horribly because the structure had all sorts of areas where moisture could hide, but with a massage of the engine (I put in a 2 liter with downdraft carbs), it was a fun car. I also moved apartments in that car; having front and rear trunks, plus taking the top off for tall items, did the trick!
ProfPlum- I knew someone that had one but sold it when he tried to lift it with the service jack and the jack just sliced though like a hot knife through butter. He was lucky; I know others that kept them longer and eventually the doors would not open from the tension of the rusted car bending in half.
The Lotus Europa S1 with the body bonded to backbone had to be the scary rust away mid-engine car. Sure looked cooler though and at only 42″ tall was.
Front end has a nice VW SP2 (my all time favorite VW) feel to it as well, which would fit the design time period of both, right?
You got to sit on the middle cushion, like some kind of king? I got to sit on the floor of Dad’s ‘73 while my older sisters got the upholstered surfaces. Also, I believe the painted targa bar was standard equipment. The black vinyl was had with the optional appearance group.
cn2800- plenty of room on the floor! If I recall the early ones had a fixed position passenger seat with so much space that they added a footrest in front of the passenger.
The only thing lacking on the 914 is that every 914 body isn’t a 914/6 body.
Which brings me to my contention: The 914’s sole fault is that all of them weren’t 914-6es!
With maybe a couple hundred 914-8s thrown in just for laughs.
No criticism of The Bishop’s work, except that I never hated the 914’s appearance, and still don’t.
I would take a 300 plus hp 914-8, not because I like it mind, but the flared 6 fenders and a Porsche racing Flat 8 would be a blast to try to control. Alas they only made 2 prototypes.
ExAutoJourno- I really don’t know why typing ‘Worst Porsche Ever’ into Google always gets you a list with the 914 on there somewhere despite far more deserving models existing (early V6 Cayenne). I thought by now people were beyond the whole ‘if it ain’t a rear engine’ thing and could respect the car for what it was/is: a pretty nice piece of engineering.
A lot of people resist change, for any reason. IIRC, the 914 inflamed Purists even more because it, like the later 924, Wasn’t Meant To Be A Porsche.
Porsche tradition was founded on reaching into the VW parts bin, though. I always thought both sides benefited from that.
My affection for the concept did waver a bit, though, when I got the chance to drive a Porsche 550. It sounded like a Beetle with a bad muffler.
flatisflat- remember there was also the rare 916 with the flared fenders on body colored nose and roof. If I recall, it was faster than 911s so was considered a liability for Porsche to sell?
Yeah, a body colored roof goes a long way in hiding the ugly. The vinyl top screams cheesy American car.
I remember seeing the 916 in a magazine test (probably R&T or C&D), and thought why the hell didn’t they all look like that. So much better.