I’m a big fan of this headline because of the E. L. Konigsburg-ian sort of name implied. As if there was a person called Currywurst V. Schnitzel and we’re debating something related to that person. That would be great. That’s not what’s happening here. We are debating Currywurst v. Schnitzel. The two great German foodstuffs.
It all started innocently enough. Our own Adrian Clarke is in Germany for some sort of huge goth affair and has been giving us updates on cars he’s seen and his eating habits. Leading to:
Those are indeed fighting words. Currywurst, if you were unfamiliar, involves cutting up little sausages and topping it with curry ketchup in order to make the German equivalent of a hot dog but somehow less healthy. I imagine if you cut up one of the giant sandworms in the book ‘Dune’ you’d end up with something that looked and tasted roughly like Currywurst (sans the psychedelic navigation powers).
Weiner Schnitzel, i.e. Schnitzel in the style of Vienna, is a simple and sublime food that’s similar to a fried pork cutlet or, if you’re in Iowa, a pork tenderloin. It comes in various styles, traditionally made with veal but also made with pork (in my mind the pork version is better). It is a crispy pillow of tenderized meat and a perfect meal for any occasion.
For the record: Jagerschnitzel, or hunter’s schnitzel, is made with a mushroom sauce and Rahmschnitzel, named for former Chicago mayor Rahm Emmanuel, involves a cream sauce.
If you’re wondering, rouladen is a dish of rolled beef (the roulades) filled with bacon, onions, mustard simmered in a rich gravy.
Thomas makes a terrible argument here and I correct him:
Just for the record, here is Sade:
And here is Boot Scootin’ Boogie:
[Editor’s Note: I’d like to amend my statement above: The other German fast-food, and in my opinion the GOAT, is Leberkässemmel mit Senf. So good, so unbelievably cheap. -DT]
Jason is correct. Volkswagen made its own Currywurst and Curry Ketchup, making it one of the most popular Volkswagen items in the parts catalog.
Anyway, this is an important debate. Please let me know below your thoughts so we can keep working.
I’ve never had either dish — heck, I’ve never even been to Germany. But I do love the heck out of curry ketchup.
Schnitzel
You’re all wrong.
Maultaschen wins.
Okay, but hear me out: why not all three?
Love me some maultaschen, though. Let’s hide our meat from God!
WHY WOULD YOU PUT THESE TWO AGAINST EACH OTHER?! Or insult either one?!?!?!??!????? (Also, technically, wienerschnitzel is veal, even though pork schnitzel is common? And both are good, so I don’t really care?)
Matt is wrong. Currywurst is taking a hot dog and making it BETTER, especially given that there’s fries or bread to soak up the extra sauce. How can you hate on curry sauce? It’s like ketchup, but better. Everyone knows ketchup is best with other stuff in it. Whataburger’s spicy ketchup is a prime example—who would eat normal ketchup when THAT’s available? Currywurst technically has its own non-ketchup tomatoey sauce (per food snobs, anyway, even though curry ketchup is a thing? and both are amazing??? and ketchup is often the base anyway?), but it’s close enough that I’m fine comparing the two.
Jason, Jason, Jason. A dinosaur scab?! DINOSAUR SCAB???? I mean, that might be right if the scab got all weird and yellowy from some infection, but I’m offended as a person from a [almost certainly related] chicken-fried steak culture. Deep-fried meat is the bomb. It is not meant to be pretty. It exists to taste good.
Thomas’ point is why I wouldn’t put these two against each other. A currywurst, to me, is best enjoyed from that stand at Brünnchen, at a picnic table, with fries and a large plop of mayo for said extra fries. It’s a phenomenal snack, and the perfect accompaniment to watching ‘Ring tourists goof off for the crowd. There are elevated versions of it—the restaurant at Autostadt had a decent one, and goodness knows every German-ish sit-down in central Texas has a hipster-friendly take on it—but I still think it’s best when served, fast, sloppy and cheap.
A wienerschnitzel (not to reopen the pizza take) is more of a meal any time it’s eaten. You need a knife and fork unless you’re a weirdo, in which case, I salute you. Tell me to eat a gott dang pizza with a fork, well, I’m just gonna hands up my schnitzel. Wait, that sounds wrong. You know what I mean. It is almost always served somewhere a tad nicer than the trailer next to YouTube Corner.
Get off my lawn and don’t come back until you bring me a döner (extra spicy, no tomato, in the little bread pocket). That is the ONE thing we don’t get here out of any of the foodstuffs mentioned and that alone is the greatest travesty in the world. I’m forever cranky about the lone döner truck in the area moving to Georgetown, and Verts going out of business. Grumble.
Weiner Schnitzel is the finest food ever served. Best with Potato Salad and Coleslaw. Must be veal anything else is a travesty, only dressing allowed is fresh lemon juice. The equation for Schnitzel consumption is G=V+1 where G is me, V is the number of Schnitzel on offer and 1 is the unfulfilled want.
Drove into Schleswig in Germany at 22:00 on a dark and stormy night. Actually the monstrous Kyrill storm of 2007. Stopped at a Gasthof, rang the bell was greeted with hospitality, ushered into a room and steered to the Restaurant where we ate excellent Schnitzel. One of the best hospitality experiences of my life.
My vote is for the chicken fried steak, or whatever they call it over or down under there.
I like a good Pork Tenderoin. It’s about the same thing. Although I’ve had German Schnitzel, and it can be VERY good.
I’ve sadly never been to Germany, but I’d always sort of assumed that Currywurst sausage was itself curry flavored, rather than it being a ‘plain’ sausage and it’s just the curry-flavored ketchup that makes it into Currywurst.
Slightly confuzzled.
Currywurst is so GOOD though! I love both, in my world, both can live in harmony.
Having lived and worked in Germany (Thank you US Army) for over 18 years, I have consumed vast quantities of both. A currywurst is best had at a Schnellimbiss with friends and at least a litre of weizenbier. A schnitzel is best consumed at a nice sit-down restaurant accompanied by a friend and at least a litre of bauernbier. Can’t go wrong with either. Again, this is my interpretation of good living!