Welcome back! Today on Shitbox Showdown, we’re deep in the rust belt looking at two unusual pickup trucks that both need some significant rust repair. Which one is more worth the effort is up to you, but first, let’s settle up on Friday’s Cadillacs:
Well now, that is actually a surprise. I expected it to go the other way. Several commenters thought the ute might actually be an old funeral flower car, but I have my doubts. It looks too rough around the edges, and I can’t imagine a funeral home wanting such a specialized vehicle in white with a red interior and roof. Seems too garish, too disrespectful. I’m pretty sure it was a homebuilt job.
Oh well, whatever. It lost. Moving on. Today’s choices are both unusual unibody pickups (well, one kinda is; we’ll get to that in a minute) and both are in need of a good welder to put them right. The good news is that they’re both mechanically sound, and complete, so once the rust repair is done, they should be good to go. Neither one was exactly a rousing sales success, but both have a bit of a following now, and I imagine the right person would jump at the chance to fix up either of these. Are they worth it to you? Let’s find out.
1982 Dodge Rampage – $4,000
Engine/drivetrain: 2.2 liter overhead cam inline 4, four-speed manual, FWD
Location: Dayton, OH
Odometer reading: 75,000 miles
Runs/drives? It’s complicated
I’ve never quite understood why this car exists. Dodge already had a perfectly good captive-import pickup in the Ram 50. This Mitsubishi in disguise was a traditional body-on-frame truck, available with 4WD, so why bother making a front-drive-only truck out of your compact sports coupe? Don’t get me wrong; I’m glad Dodge did just that, because Rampages (and Plymouth Scamps) are cool little trucks. I just don’t understand the thought process.
The Omni 024 on which the Rampage is based came standard with a 1.7 liter engine from Volkswagen. By 1982, when the Rampage came out, Chrysler had shoehorned in the K-car’s 2.2 liter engine, and this was the standard engine in the Rampage. It still wasn’t a ton of power – 84 horsepower – but every little bit helps. The 2.2 had legs; it lasted well into the ’90s and powered pretty much all of Chrysler’s lineup at one time or another.
The 2.2 in this Rampage runs well, with a new carb and some other recent work. At the moment, the truck isn’t drivable because there’s no gas tank installed. The old one was rusted out; a new one is included. Lots of other patch panels are also included. Think of it as a big model kit, except you have to weld the parts together instead of using some vaguely citrusy-smelling glue. It is missing its rear window, and that might be a little hard to find. It also needs brake lines and the load-sensing valve for the rear brakes; apparently they’re rusted out too.
In addition to he rust repair panels, the seller is including two extra sets of factory wheels, another complete interior, and a bunch of other parts. With as rare as these things are, you could probably sell some of that to offset the cost of fixing it up.
1991 Jeep Comanche – $2,500 (or $4,000 with the plow)
Engine/drivetrain: 4.0 liter overhead valve inline 6, four-speed automatic, part-time 4WD
Location: Door County, WI
Odometer reading: 39,000 miles
Runs/drives? Yes, but…
Most trucks are built on a separate frame, and the bed and cab both bolt to that frame. The SUV variant is built in the same way, except the separate cab and bed are replaced by a one-piece body, but it’s still attached to a frame. But the Jeep Cherokee was designed from the start as an SUV, with a “unibody” design – there’s no separate frame. This complicated things when Jeep wanted to make a pickup truck based on the Cherokee. Jeep engineers had to add a chunk of traditional frame onto the back, so there was a place to attach a bed. The junction between unibody and rear frame is a well-known rust spot on these trucks – and it’s exactly where this one has decided to crack. [Ed note: I’d still rock it. -DT].
This Comanche spent its life in possibly the most selfless role we ask of trucks: a plow truck. More than that, a plow truck in northern Wisconsin. While the rest of us hunker down and watch the snow fall with our hot chocolate, these unsung heroes clear away the mess, moving the snow aside so we can go about our business. Obviously this little truck wasn’t a municipal truck; more likely privately-owned by someone contracted to take care of parking lots and such.
The upside of this harsh life is that this truck has hardly any miles on it, the odometer reads 39,000 and the seller says it’s original. Of course, the bulk of those miles were spent pushing a heavy steel blade along the ground at five miles an hour in brutally cold temperatures, so it’s not like they were easy miles. Still, the seller says it runs and drives beautifully, except that it’s about to break in two.
Repair on the frame is possible, if you know what you’re doing, and stiffeners are available to shore up the repair. It’s not going to be easy to erase thirty-two Wisconsin winters from the underside of this truck, but it could be done. There weren’t many Comanches around to begin with, and fewer still now; I guess the question is how badly do you want to save this one?
Rust repair isn’t everyone’s bag, I know. I hate it, myself. But I know some folks like the challenge of it, and being able to cut out an old rotten section of metal and weld in a new one is kind of like having a superpower. Someone with the talent could save either of these trucks. If you are that person, where are you going to direct your efforts?
(Image credits: Craigslist sellers)
Jeep trauma.
One exactly like that came into the shop, it hadn’t had an oil change in 50,000km. The airbox was half full of oily goop. When I opened the drain plug it flowed like molasses initially, and I could divert the slow stream with a magnet. But soon the flow slowed to the pace of ancient glass. I left it overnight. With fresh oil it ran-ish? Sounded like gravel in a washing machine. So sadly I have to vote for the Wish.com El Camino.
I’d love to rock the hell out of that Rampage at Radwood, but the price and condition take me back to practicality (if you can call a frame repair that) with the Jeep. As far as the reason for the Rampage’s existence, it may have something to do with the “rabbit pickup” that VW was offering at the time. Chrysler may have seen that as something that didn’t have any domestic competition. Obviously the overall market for such a thing would have been wildly overestimated, but that’s a story for another day.
“I’ve never quite understood why this car exists.”
Same reason the current Ford Maverick exists.
I believe it also was an attempt to compete in the same niche as the VW Rabbit pickup, another near-forgotten tiny ute. And at the time, El Caminos/Rancheros still sold well enough, so ute versions of econo-cars made sense in a way.
It probably seems crazy today, but back then a car buyer not only had, but expected a huge variety of body styles and features to choose from, and from nearly every manufacturer at that. Now when you visit a dealer, your choice is basically crossover, SUV, or pickup plus maybe a token hatchback with available hot-hatch trim. And if you’re particularly lucky, a token “halo model” performance or sports car.
I voted Jeep before even looking at the prices. I know the Rampage is rare but still, the condition…
With the new Rampage news recently, I had a similar thought as you Mark about why they made the Rampage at all. Chrysler must have had the same thought process since it didn’t last for long. Maybe they initially planned to take the small pickup in-house but then kept the Ram 50 going? Or just “because VW did it” with the Caddy and they were already aping the Rabbit with the standard Omnirizon?
Both are terrible. I am going solely on price for this one. Cheaper is better.
I would choose “neither” if I could. I think those are both interesting trucks…but I’m never buying a rusty car again. My 72 Super Beetle is eaten up with rust. Wiring, mechanical, interior/upholstery, suspension…I can and have done all of those things. But rust repair is a totally different animal.
No gas, no glass, no cash.
Perfect!
I’ll take the Mitsubishi pickup car
If you’re talking Rampage: it’s a Omni. There’s far more European influence in the Omni (not including original engines) then Mitsubishi…. there wasn’t even a Mistu engine offered for it.
oops
I’d still take it over the Comanche tho 😛
Jeep, please.
I had an ’84 or ’85 Dodge Daytona – basically the same platform (and engine) as the Rampage. It was not a good car. Having to replace all the brake lines – when combined with the other rust – means this thing is probably about to collapse into a pile of flakes. As I found out, the structure of these things is not robust even on its best day: a low-speed collision (<25mph) compressed the front corner dramatically and the car was totaled.
The seller seems to know this isn’t a super appealing project. There are some new parts included; one which stands out is “-carpet (its PURPLE but it’s new)“.
The Jeep does need some work, but it sounds like the frame and rust are solved problems, meaning there will be guidance available and you won’t be trying to find a solution on your own. The seller can keep the plow, but the spare bed will be a nice swap even if it is white. The bedliner – which is probably load-bearing in its current position – can probably be transferred to the white bed, which is nice.
As noted earlier there needs to be a “Fuck that” option, but it needs to come at a cost, say 20% of the averaged asking price.
In this case $4000 + $2500 = $6500 ÷ 2 =$3250
20% of that is $650, which you would have to donate to charity to be spared the burden of owning either of these rust-buckets.
And the Charity you donate the Ownership Escape Premium to should be the JT Home for Recovering Blinker Fluid Drinkers, or the AAA.
The Rampage is too much work at too much $$$ for something that won’t be worth much when you are done.
Comanches are awesome when together, and have a small but loyal following (like XJs but cooler). Considering this has been for sale awhile they are probably flexible on price, and it’d be a great donor for a clean one that needed parts. The white bed itself is probably worth close to a grand.
Comanche all the way
Like everyone else said, both are overpriced. Comanche wins.
I’m pretty certain I could find someone to attempt to fix it. Worst case is that I go out and search for a 2wd Comanche to become a 4wd Comanche. The interior, wiring harness, and drivetrain have solid value.
the biggest down fall is low miles on a plow vehicle. Overheating and massive jarring of the whole vehicle when in use make for some pretty beat up parts and pieces. It still is a much cooler thing than the Rampage, but the Rampage is seemingly turnkey…the issue is really it is only for the half dozen or so Rampage lovers out there. to the rest of us it is a throwback that is interesting to look at, but a real pain to try to live with in this day and age.
Mr. Plow, he is a loser.
And, I think, he is a boozer.
I’ve loved the Comanches since they were introduced in the 80’s. For that reason, I clicked on the Jeep. That, and because I have always thought the Rampage was one of the worst looking cars/trucks to ever see production.
But in reality, I wouldn’t buy either of these.
https://media.giphy.com/media/9U4iHUQFj9fgs/giphy.gif
The Rampage needs to lose a digit, preferably the 4. It would barely be worth four grand in top shape.
Neither needs to be an option on these…
The MJ is just not worth the amount of required work at that price and the Rampage isn’t really either.
If I was forced to buy one it would be the rampage, it’s a good place to swap a GLH powertrain…
I wonder if the rampage unibody could just bolt onto the Jeep frame. That might be something.
I appreciate the Mr. Plow reference…now I’m imagining myself in a fleece-collared jacket and my briefs, performing an alluring dance for my wife.
Never Stellantis. But, Rampage wins because of the video game.
My kind of showdown!
The only logical answer is the Rampage, even if I live in the North with a 4WD Comanche available. A busted frame? No.
I’ll roll my dice on a carbureted Chrysler 4-cylinder powered coupe utility.
Break out the welding torch and reach for the Jeep.
The Rampage is a long term project with hard to source parts and a lot of needed rust repair for a car that just isn’t worth much even in perfect shape. The comanche is an entirely lost cause BUT with low miles, the powertrain and interior are likely well worth close to asking price as a transplant for a non-rusted but otherwise tired comanche or cherokee project, so for that reason it gets my vote.
Sitting here wondering just what the hell I’d do with a snow plow south of I-10…
You could clear out the crickets or iguanas or whatever thing falls on your streets instead of snow.
Ducks, we have ducks. So, soooooo many stupid looking web-footed fat stupid ducks.
Skip the plow and save the extra $1,500!
I really want both of these, but, since I had to vote, I went for the Rampage. I had an ‘82 and it was a great little car. Could’ve used a 5-speed, which came the next model year. Price is steep for its condition, but I suppose that’s the nature of things these days and they aren’t making any more of them. I wonder how this would do with a VW Sportwagen S 4-Motion drivetrain.
for half the price I will take the Jeep. Though I feel both are way overpriced for what they are.
Let’s see, running truck with massive amounts of rust, or non running car, for nearly twice the price with similar amount of rust… Easy choice for me, though I get the aversion to wanting to deal with frame rust. I also just have no desire to have the rampage in any condition so there’s that.