ShitBox Showdown: The British Are Back In The Cape Fear

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I was 17 in ‘97 and around that time, British rock group Oasis once ruled the world of Rock n Roll from their tiny island in the North Atlantic. They had just released their 3rd studio album “Be Here “Now” with the hit track ”Don’t Go Away”.

This was a follow up to mega-smash hits off earlier albums such as “Don’t Look Back In Anger”, “Wonderwall” and “Champagne Supernova”, which have been staples on Modern Rock radio for the past 25+ years. The band also famously broke up after founding brothers Noel and Liam Gallagher got into their final, band-ending sibling spat during a concert in France in 2009.

Sadly “Be Here Now” did not live up to the band’s expectations and Noel Gallagher summed the album up as “the sound of a bunch of guys, on coke, in the studio, not giving a f***”. The album featured a white Rolls-Royce sunken into a pool on the cover.

Ten years before that, I was 7 and another British group by the name of Whitesnake was ripping up the radio waves. This was, understandably, before my time, yet “Here I Go Again” has been heard by my ears hundreds of times in the 36 succeeding years.

The video for that song was just about as popular as the track itself, with a Ms. Tawny Kitaen shooting to stardom whilst dancing upon lead singer David Coverdale’s personal car – a Jaguar XJ6.

Interestingly enough, both of those above cars are for sale this week in my hometown! Let’s put those two rides into the Showdown today and see which is the better ride to purchase from The Port City of Wilmington, NC!

Note: I’d ask our line British staff member (Goth Uncle Adrian from “Adrian’s Auction Anarchy” fame) to chime in here, but I believe that I can safely assume that he’s not exactly the biggest Oasis or Whitesnake fan.

Let’s See Which Car Won Yesterday, Shall We?

Screenshot 2023 10 05 9.08.15 Pm

Well, it looks like the BMW won by 107 votes, which very reluctantly included mine, since there was no option for “neither”. I share my colleague’s admiration for V12 engines, yet will note that I believe there there are none that make any sense to own (the 2 shown above plus the Jag V12).

I’m currently helping my same friend and neighbor that owns the Exploder featured here fix the myriad of issues he has with his ’07 Passat (bad wiring insulation and electrical shorts, bad fuel pump module, bad/clogged moonroof drains, soaked carpets, etc.). Due to this, I have a first-hand disdain for VW cars of this ilk and BMWs  also don’t exactly have the shiniest reputations either. You couldn’t pay me enough not to sprint in the opposite direction of those 2 cars as fast as my 43yr old ass can move these days.

This is also what makes The Autopian writing staff so great: we all have a widely varying taste in cars! As a 25+yr consumer of auto media, having a staff that all likes the same Porsches, BMWs, Corvettes, Hondas, Subarus, Camaros Mustangs and the rest of the usual suspects gets old.

Anyways, the 34yr old BMW beats out the Piech-era VW, which is a pretty low threshold to beat. Both of these cars have limited miles and limited years ahead of them with massive repair costs around the corner in this guy’s opinion. Go get yourself a $220 Stratus Coupe instead of these two labyrinths of dysfunction and live the good life, like me, your buddy SWG.

Today’s First Contender: 1969 Rolls Royce Shadow $2500

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Engine/Drivetrain: 172 hp 6.2 L V8

Location: The Cape Fear, Wilmington, NC

Odometer reading: 44,000 miles

Runs/drives? No sir or madam. This ad was found via a Gossin Motors Backyard Shitbox Rescue search.

 

When I came across this car I couldn’t believe that the car that was sunk into the pool on the album cover for “Be Here Now” was for sale locally! Same color and all. Though, that car was a ’72 and was purchased for £1,200 without an engine (but with a fresh re-spray!) for the album photo shoot.

Fun fact: It appeared on the cover with the number plate SYO 724F – a nod to The Beatles as that was the registration of the police van on the cover of their seminal 1969 album Abbey Road.

Rolls In Pool

Be Here Now Album Cover

Hat-tip to both The Bishop and my good buddy Nick Chinn for the Oasis car-background details assist. Another zany Oasis car story regarding a Mark II Jag can be found here.

Here’s what the seller has to say about this Shadow:

Seller’s Description (verbatim):

PEASE READ. To many scams on last add This is a complete 1969 shadow. Does not run. What it needs: Wiring Carbs rebuilt Probably a fuel pump Hynautic system rebuilt Interior wood refinished Column repairs Window actuators repaired Paint This is a good restoration project with a cost of around 20,000 for genuine RR parts and depending on your skill set. Could’ve a fun conversion.

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Ok, so if your take on these cars is similar to mine then a Rolls-Royce is super cool as long as it’s Churchill-era old or within-the-past-25 years-new. Everything in between those two bookends is fine, I guess?

This car just screams for an EV conversion or an LS swap to me. Keeping it OEM and pristine will only go so far. The value for running versions shows to be around $20K, which is affordable to the great scores of The Unwashed. That’s not what a Rolls owner wants now, is it? They crave something a cut above and a late-1960s to 1980s Rolls-Royce does not seem to portray Old Money for The Grey Poupon crowd. Your genearationally wealthy contemporaries at the Country Club would never risk any association with the lesser bourgeoisie, so why take a chance with a lesser, age-and-time-diminished Rolls such as this?

Instead it seems like the kind of car your zany high school or college friend buys (while drunk) to piss off his wife and to be able to claim to the other guys in the bar that he has a Rolls-Royce. Aspirational, in a certain sense, still.

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The interior looks to be in top shape and all the trim is there, so just cleaning up those carbs, grabbing a set of steel coil springs and doing a little wiring work to utilize the existing hardware could also be a solid-ass option. I mean dude, it’s a frickin Rolls-Royce and there aren’t exactly a ton of them out there!

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Also, morbid fact: Charles Rolls was the first Briton to die in a powered aircraft accident when he crashed at Southbourne on July 12, 1910.

It’s not exactly a car you see for sale everyday.

Note: This car sold in-between the time it was first found by Gossin Motors Backyard Shitbox Auto Rescue and the time this piece was published – bummer! Here’s the ad link regardless, here.

 

1984 Jaguar(e) XJ6: $2,000 “OBO”

Engine/Drivetrain: Chevy 350 Small block!

Location: The Cape Fear, Wilmington, NC

Odometer reading: 64,656 miles

Runs/drives? Hard nope. No sir. This ad was found via a Gossin Motors Backyard Shitbox Rescue search.

 

Jag 4

Ok, as the only Jag owner here in the Autopian Writing Crew (actually I have 2!), I will say that newer Jags are far cooler to me than the Ye Olde English Jags of Yore. All that wood and leather is great in the traditional British fashion, but you can only eat so many potted pies with warm beer before yearning for something else. Something a bit less Revolutionary War era.

I’ve been trying to get David to approve an article on my Jag XK8 now for over 3 years, and I’m still trying. Don’t let his amiable demeanor, trove of kittens, electric car fleet, and general LA-nice-guy persona throw you off as the dude is tough-as-nails. He also doesn’t seem to have much of an interest in broken Jags…yet! I’m here to change that though, so keep you eyes peeled, as I think we may have a breakthrough in ’24.

Jag 1

Ok, back to the matter at hand! Like I was saying, old Jags aren’t as cool as say, my XK or a new-ish F-type, but they have both of those cars beat in 2 areas: price and wrench-ability. You can get them for wicked cheap and also pull crazy moves such as installing a Chevy truck motor with ease!

Try doing that on an F-type.

Jag 6

Here;s what the seller says (verbatim) in the ad which is linked here:

Restoration special. 84 XJ6 with 90’s 350 Rebuilt Chevy truck engine. Ran until a month ago. Something is wrong with the wiring.
Has clean title and car cover. light rust around the front and back window. 65,000 miles on rebuilt engine.
Ran great just needs some minor repairs to get it going again and you can cruz in a cool Vintage Antique classic .
2000.00 or best offer.

Jag 5

I don’t know about you, but 90s Chevy 350 wiring is about as easy as engine wiring gets. Pick up a Power Probe, dust off your voltmeter, flex some serious patience and give it the ‘ol college try!

Generally you’re going to be looking at alternator voltage, PCM, grounds, cam/crank, TPS, coolant sensor, ignition, O2 and the rest of their merry band of electrical malfeasants.

Jag 8

Old Jag parts aren’t that easy to get and when you can find them, they’re usually stupid expensive, so chopping up these cars to have a little fun with what’s there/what’s left makes perfect sense. They will not grow in value with time, so concerns about messing up a future classic aren’t present.

Jag 3

I look at a car like this the same way that I look at my sweet-ass Supercharged Buick: they aren’t worth much and will never be, so go wild and have fun.

Hey, it’s been a blast sitting in for Mark Tucker (who seems to be having a wild time on vacation from the photos he’s shared) and I sincerely hope you liked the guest appearances of Thomas Hundal, Mercedes Streeter, The Bishop and a little SWG flavor today on The Showdown this week. Cheers homies!

So, my fellow friends and Autopians, which will it be? The immobile album-cover car from Oasis’ 3rd album, or the dance-pad Jag with a Chevy heart that Tawny Kitaen likes to bust a move upon? You choose!

 

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103 thoughts on “ShitBox Showdown: The British Are Back In The Cape Fear

    1. I never heard of oasis or anyone else in your email. But Whitesnake and Tawney Kittaen were famous then and still moderately famous now. Albeit tawny hot tawny crazy.

  1. Great match up, SWG!

    As logical as the Chev-swapped Jag may be, I went with the R-R.

    One of mum’s old bosses had one and I’ve contemplated blowing up my finances many times to get one and keep it running.

    My dad worked for BL at the Zetland plant before they shut in the mid-70s, and he had a thing for British cars with a Mark II Jaguar being his dream car he never got to buy before he passed during my childhood.

    As much as I try to stay clear of fussy British vehicles, I’m still drawn to Rolls-Royces, as damn silly as it would be to have one here.

  2. Well, it is one of my bucket list items to one day own a cheap old Rolls Royce, and this one has quite the pedigree. This is an easy one for me.

    1. Still very close a couple hours later: 230-226 in favor of the Jag. I voted for the Rolls, though. I’ve already done a Chevy/Jag conversion and it was lots of fun, but the Rolls would be smog-exempt, and getting my ’87 XJ6 smog legal was the biggest pain in the ass of the process (not really the Jag’s fault, but rather a budgetary crisis in California that meant all the smog referees in the state were laid off for several months).

    1. That hoss turned back into a moldy bathtub after the recent tropical storm that hit Wilmington last month (I forget the name of the storm). The one moon roof drain like that was left factory/untouched finally bit me in the ass (cheap plastic, cracked drain lines that leak behind the dash).

      I removed all the standing water and will be slicing the roof off of it late this fall early winter. Big moves, right up ahead. Thanks for asking and for reading J!

      1. I read this article and thought “oh neat, both of these cars are in Wilmington, that’s where I am.” Then I said “Oh a tropical storm hit last month, that happened here too.” And only then did it click that you’re also living in Wilmington. Now I will have to go back and look through all your articles and see what’s to see!

  3. My heart wants the Rolls but the Jag just makes more sense. My plans for either one would be to swap it, LS would be fine but I think something like a 1UZ would be cooler. But the Jag already has the hard part done and sorting out wiring on a SBC wouldn’t be too bad, even if you need to scrap everything and start from scratch.

  4. I’ll take my black pudding and Old Speckled Hen with a side of Jaaaaaaaag. I already own three of them – including an ’82 and an ’87 XJ6, one with a Chevy 350, so I’m sticking with what I already know. The one here would fit in nicely and it’s always good to have an extra Jaguar no matter how many one already owns.

  5. Oddly enough not keen on the Chevy conversion. With the original engine I’d actually be more interested. Also, I have a lovely and very original XJ6 already, so I don’t need some bodged small-block project.

    Meanwhile, I am a full-on (pre-German) Bentley guy, and not a Rolls guy in the least – however, for two grand? The car appears to be in pretty good cosmetic nick, so I’d go electric and have true silent, torquey comfort. Truthfully, if that had come up for sale in my neck of the woods I might have gone for it. And if it had been an old Bentley at that price in similar shape I think I’d have been willing to endure any amount of wrath from my wife.

  6. The old Rolls is at least more unique than the Jag. They will both be expensive to keep as a traditional collector. Honestly you could turn it into a comfy AF driving simulator or park it in your yard with a projector and had a private drive in theater.

  7. If buying an old German car is tic-tac-toe buying an old English car is Russian roulette with six bullets. And at least the Germans are at the bleeding edge. Old, independent RR was using a pushrod V8.

    But a Rolls is a Rolls, so it is the winner.

    1. You know, maybe I’ve been lucky and got a good one but my ’88 Jag XJ6 has had no more problems than any other 80s car would. Every mechanical repair has been with good reason and could have happened with any car of similar vintage – except for a couple minor niggling electrical issues. However, being an electrical engineer and knowing how to use a soldering iron fixed that, so those repairs were my labor and the cost of a spool of solder. Call it a hobby.

      Give me British car problems over German car problems any day.

  8. That Rolls Royce will probably show up at Beverly Hills Classic Cars next week for $12,500. I love it though. Great for an LS swap, or.. 4×4 chassis swap..

  9. Hynautic system? Did Rolls really use boat hydraulic engine controls? I’m going to guess (based on the sheer number of grammatical errors in the ad) that this is a mistake. If not, well, blow me down.

    As an aside, you haven’t heard Whitesnake’s “Here I Go Again” in its element until its blasted through a Blaupunkt in a 911 Targa (open) beatin’ feet through the Alps.

  10. Gotta be the Rolls-Royce for me (both names, please; Charles Rolls was the salesman, Henry Royce was the engineer). If you’re going to suffer, don’t half-ass it. Chevy-swapped Jags aren’t hard to find for this price in running condition, so I’ll row for the Crewe crew.

  11. I am venturing into the headache of British autos, I might as well make it a Rolls Royce. When it is broken in your garage, you can still say “I own a Rolls Royce”. Break out the Grey Poupon.

  12. I’m assuming the Rolls of that era were body on frame? Pitch all the mechanicals, drop it on an old 4×4 truck chassis and hit the trails with a Pabst Blue Ribbon in one hand an a Grey Poupon in the other. Also, the purple paint and flames mentioned below would be a solid addition here,

  13. The Rolls interior looks like a lovely place to pass the time.
    That said, the XJ is one of my favorite cars ever.
    We’ll take the Jag-you-er.
    Thanks for the guest-star appearance, Stevie G!

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