The Autopian Staff Can’t Decide If The Dodge Avenger Is Bad Or Not: Tales From The Slack

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What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object? Friction? The sort of cacophonic bang you’d hear in a 1920s films? An irreparable social rift? Sometimes, it’s just constant bickering about a lump of late-aughts plastic. The Dodge Avenger has done some funny things to the house of The Autopian as of late, specifically that low-mileage 2008 Dodge Avenger SE up for auction on Bring A Trailer.

On the one side, those of us who think the Avenger is an abominable POS. On the other, those who, um, like the Dodge Avenger. Look, it doesn’t take much searching to find out which side of the line I stand on, but my coworkers are more divided than a house that cannot stand. Intriguingly, David was the first one on the anti-Avenger side to fire a salvo.

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From there, the pile-on continued. After all, why shouldn’t it? That awful grey steering wheel makes a great punching bag.

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Of course, not all of us are on the same page here.

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Particularly Gossin, who has recent firsthand experience with a final-gen Sebring.

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To be fair, the Avenger takes may require a little clarification, in the case of David’s. If your choice is between a Dodge Avenger and walking, door cards made of stinging nettles sounds preferable to blisters.

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You know what? Jason’s right here. The Bring A Trailer Dodge Avenger is nigh-on useless. Oh, and Steve had a negative experience with an Avenger that involved temporary sun blindness, so you can probably work out what camp he’s in.

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Unfortunately, any attempts to bring up the Avenger result in some, um, behavior. Today, while discussing what Tales From The Slack should be about, Gossin used rationalization, and Mercedes took a different approach.

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Well, now that’s an impressive threat of self-sabotage. So, will Mercedes buy an Avenger? I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. In the meantime, the Dodge Avenger should probably go on the list of banned topics in The Autopian Slack, like “Two Girls, One Cup” or whether or not a vanilla bean latte is a type of soup. Who knew that such mediocrity could cause such a divide?

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40 thoughts on “The Autopian Staff Can’t Decide If The Dodge Avenger Is Bad Or Not: Tales From The Slack

  1. Even though i now daily drive a 2021 Prius Prime and, when boredom sets in, i take my almost 300k miles old (but still trusty) 2012 Civic Si for a spin, i’m a Chrysler guy at heart… but i refuse to see those Daimler/Cerberus derived
    malaise era pt.2 econoboxes as a Chrysler product. My 1st gens Neons, that never were half as bad as people would tell me, would be embarrassed by them..

  2. it was the size and price of a full size car but it had the enmities of an entry level compact car… you were better off buying a mitsubishi galant, or a hyundai in a vacuum it was not a BAD car but compared to just about anything else you could buy for the same money it was last place. what made it worse was that it had a 4 speed penalty box transmission for the more entry level models. so maybe you bought the avenger because the price was attractive well guess what you poor now you get the PENALTY version of the penalty car! Dodge should have put the good 6 speed transmission on every avenger.

  3. The car is ….. fine. However, it is also the vehicular equivalent of the failed drug dealer or the traffic stop gone wrong. I’ve a seen a bunch of these clapped out and barely following the rules if the road. These are cheap transportation will a fuzzy thru line with charger in styling.

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