It took precisely two seconds after I parked up on the seafront. A bald, shirtless man accessorized with bad tattoos and a can of fighting lager, impressively inebriated considering it was before lunchtime, began gesticulating wildly at me through the windscreen. “Nice car mate! That is WELL WICKED! FAHKIN’ SWEET!” Well quite. Does the M stand for moron?
I’ve not driven a car that attracted quite so much attention since I bought my Nuova Fiat 500 some 15 years ago. Everywhere I went I got similar, less drunken appreciative comments, although I should point out the majority of my week with the BMW M240i xDrive (you could probably lighten the car 10kg by prying all the badges off) was spent in the taste-free county of Essex. It’s basically England’s Florida.
Front bumper triangle violence aside, it’s an aggressively handsome car—well proportioned and, if not exactly under the top, it’s not over the top either. All 2 Series (including the M2) share the same body in white now (the bare metal shell stripped naked), with the different models defined by front and rear bumper treatments.
The amazing purple hue my loaner came in is known as Thundernight Metallic and at our regular meeting last week it was accepted into the palette of acceptable gothic car colors. I loved it. But before we get into the specifics of what the M240ixDrive is and isn’t, there’s a large elephant in the room to deal with, and I’m about to piss on its peanuts.
Will the Armchair Design Critics Shut Up Already
The hate-boners from BMW fans that accompany every new release from Munich are getting increasingly fucking tiresome. A subset of cars, consisting mainly of the E30, E36, E46, E39 and E38 (but curiously not the original E21 3 series) and a few other outliers, have been glorified and masturbated over to such ridiculous lengths by simpering shit-gibbons with BMW roundels tattooed on their dicks that any new one that doesn’t meet the untouchable perfection of earlier models is taking a giant steamy dump over everything that they worship, and how very dare BMW do that.
Get over yourselves. You’re talking about a series of cars that span, charitably, two decades, which is a relatively small timeframe for a company that started building Austin Sevens under license in 1928. BMW’s market no longer consists of German CEOs needing to storm the Autobahn at midnight with Kraftwerk thumping out the Blaupunkt. They need to sell cars worldwide to a much wider audience, and with vastly different safety and efficiency standards. These people need to stop thinking BMW makes cars exclusively for enthusiasts and journalists. They do not.
Is there a reasonable design discussion about their current direction to be had? Sure. I have criticized them myself in the past. But in our technology-drenched and attention deficit present, BMW is designing cars it knows it can sell, and that is the context we should apply to its current output. Not some adolescent wank fantasy about what BMW used to be 30-odd years ago. Stop pining like a lovesick puppy. They’re just not into you that way. Ugh.
That being said, the 2 Series remains something of a shibboleth for the BMW faithful. Of the current range, it’s the one closest in spirit, if not execution to those old athletic three boxes. When it comes to drivetrain options there’s an element of monkey paw wish granting. The cooking 230i, despite its name, is a 2.0-liter four. Sixes are only available in this M240ixDrive (a RWD, non-xDrive is available in the U.S., but not in the UK) and the M2. And the M2 is the only way to get a manual. Here’s the thing though; despite its M badging and being marketed as an M car, I’m not sure this model would be improved with a manual.
It Has An Actual Straight-Six
What you do get is a 3.0-liter straight six with a single turbo making a whopping 374 bhp. Even though it bellyflops onto the scales at over 1,600kg (about 3,500lbs), this is a Very Fast Car. There’s enough firepower underneath the curve to rocket you down the road and past dawdling pensioners with an ease that feels almost decadent.
Because it has a traditional automatic, as opposed to a DSG, even full-throttle kickdown shifts are creamy. There are paddles, but you have to be in Sport Plus mode to control the changes yourself – otherwise, it defaults back to auto after a few seconds. And in Sport mode(s) the engine howls gloriously. Is it real or is it Memorex? Honestly, who cares? It’s fantastic. US models have a launch mode that will allow an almost four-second 0-60 mph time, but because the UK is a nation of hooligans, it’s not available here lest we turn up at the local BMW service department with a box of shattered drivetrain parts.
What’s more impressive than the engine is the way this car rides. A lot of cars in sport mode become total bone crunchers (hello Civic Type R). It’s staggeringly good considering it’s on 19” wheels with 35-section Pilot Sport 4s. In comfort mode, I’ll stick my neck out and say it’s better than my old air-suspended Range Rover was. Bumps are heard and not felt – even those sharp angry little speed humps designed to knock your eyeballs onto the floor barely register.
Tuneful, big-lunged engine. Auto gearbox. Brilliant ride. You might be getting the impression the M240i (I can’t be arsed to keep typing out the full name) is a bit wafty and soggy. Not a bit of it. There’s the tiniest hint of pitch and roll on initial input to let you know it’s responding, and it then composes itself into a fluid, flowing road burner.
The four-wheel drive system is rear-biased so out of tighter corners you feel the rear digging in to catapult you from the exit, but even in treacherous weather (one day it won’t rain when I have a test car, but that day is not today) there’s no hint of it struggling to get the power down. It’s an immensely capable and confident way of getting down a bendy road quickly, helped by its handy dimensions. But it’s not a tangy, zingy, wriggly device, and this is where the first of my small niggles comes in. The M badging and marketing feel a bit incongruous. Although it makes sod all difference to how the car goes, it does sell it as something it really isn’t.
Remember those Great BMW Instrument Panels?
The next niggle is an ergonomic one. The latest 2 series all come equipped with iDrive 8, which turns the instrument cluster cinemascope. This mostly works well, although diving into the secondary menus the iconography takes on a whiff of unbranded generic media player. The problem is the gauges directly in front of you.
With traditional dials (or digital facsimiles) you read important information at a glance – the position of the needle on the dial tells you all you need to know instantly. It’s a long-established heuristic that didn’t need reinventing for the digital age. Which is exactly what the UX/UI geeks in Munich have done. You now have two sort of semi-hexagon shapes with a small rising bar to indicate road speed and engine revs. This means the information is squeezed into a smaller vertical space instead of being spread out around the edge of a much bigger one. It’s incredibly unintuitive and impossible to read. Flummoxing around with various display settings didn’t make it any better. In the end, I had to settle for a digital mph readout and gave up trying to read engine revs. In sport mode the situation is slightly better, and if you’re shifting your own a set of change-up lights appear. For a company once famed for its ergonomic clarity it’s bloody infuriating. While I’m griping, there are no volume controls on the steering wheel, which drove me absolutely loopy. The optional heads-up display however is brilliant – every car should have one, proof that on some level BMW does care about people who actually want to drive, rather than merely control.
Everything else ergonomically related is absolutely nailed on. It’s a normal sedan shape, so the visibility is superb. The driving position is perfect, although my butt is bonier than the Natural History Museum so I found the seats were a little hard over a longer journey. Non-goth supermodels will be fine. Probably less fine in the back, which despite being well-appointed with its own HVAC controls and USB ports, is decidedly snug. The front seats shuffle forward automatically when you tip the backrest, and I managed to squash my foot when the seat moved back into position after I clambered in the rear to take the interior shots. At just over 4.5 meters (179”) long though, this is still a compact car with a decent-sized trunk. There are plenty of thoughtful touches as well – a reminder if you’ve left your phone in the wireless charging tray, the way you can dip the passenger side mirror with a flick of a switch for reversing to make sure you don’t curb a wheel (ahem).
It’s Not All Misery in the Slack
I was chatting with our resident BMW expert Thomas Hundal in Autopian Slack about this car (yes, we do actually use it to talk about work. Sometimes) and he said it’s “probably the third best 6 Series of all time.” And although agreeing with him makes me crazy, he’s absolutely right. (Editor’s Note: Damn, where does that leave the 4 Series, then? —PG)
The M240ixDrive isn’t a mechanically alive road scalpel. It’s a grown-up high-performance personal luxury coupe with a slightly awkward techno-sheen and swagger for days. There’s no stupid exhaust note, no tacked-on go-faster bits, just a quiet and subtle menace about the way this car goes about its business. I wasn’t sure I was going to get on with this car. In fact, for the first day or two I did feel a little at odds with it. And then by the end of our week together I didn’t want to give it back.
Style, equipment, power, handling and build quality. You’re probably thinking this combination of killer attributes is going to be expensive. Well, about that: According to the media pack I was given, the On The Road price with a few options was £50,210. I couldn’t quite match this in the BMW UK configurator, but it represents staggering value for money. When was the last time you could say that about a BMW? Take the M badges off, fix the gauges and the volume controls with an OTA update and it would be nearly perfect.
So go ahead and crank yourselves blind into over ZHP packages or whatever other obscure BMW chassis or engine code does it for you. It’s boring and I don’t care. Because BMW is still making great cars for enthusiasts. You just need to look a little harder to find them.
And specify the metallic purple paint.
- Man Buys Broken Mechanics Special BMW i3 For Dirt Cheap. Fixes It In Front Of The Seller In 3 Minutes And Drives Off
- The BMW Neue Klasse Concept May Be Re-Introducing Something Unexpected And Important: A Real Bumper (Sort Of)
- Rust Is Killing My Stately BMW E39 Wagon And Repair Shops Don’t Even Want To Look At It
- I’ve Been Driving The Cheapest BMW i3 In America For 5 Months And I Remain Amazed: How Is This Car So Perfect?
Free pass to any drunks who want to stumble around complimenting people and telling them their stuff is wicked.
When I was living in Germany in the mid 2000s there was a sinister looking black M6 parked on the side street. One of the local drunks stumbled around the corner and froze at the sight of it. He swayed there for a few minutes pointing and nodding to himself. I agreed.
One of the stupidest car names I’ve seen. And it’s only getting worse at BMW. Some other quality and worthwhile gripes in this comment section. Thank you for offering us fodder to bitch about.
Nice engine.
Nice seats.
Decent roofline/DLO.
Nice grille.
Nice silhouette.
Don’t need AWD – because unnecessary weight and complexity.
The “Ginza Billboard at Night” instrument display would be sad in a Nissan. It’s just plain stupid in a BMW.
Why do we need a spoiler glued to the top of a ducktail?
I despise all the slashes and gashes and trapezoids for the sake of straight edges in the chin and ass of this thing – I believe Lucid has proven that great aerodynamics doesn’t mean a car needs to be ugly.
Too bad tasty purple paint can’t hide the offensively ugly overstyled bumper covers – but at least it’s not as bad as the Pontiac GrandAm-inspired M2 fascia.
it would be interesting to try the RWD version to see what the difference is. I suspect, in day to day use, in temperate climates, not a lot.
I suspect it will have better steering feel due to lighter front end weight and less physical force being pushed thru the front wheels.
Then of course, there’s the thing that reviewers rarely consider: Maintenance over the lifetime of the car will be less costly due to the unnecessary mechanical complexity AWD adds to any vehicle.
I’m gonna need you to circle back to your argument that it wouldn’t be improved by a manual and give me some premises in support of that heresy
I just don’t think it would suit the nature of the car. I’m very much of the ‘appropriate gearbox for the appropriate car’ school of thought. This thing has so much motor and such long legs the 8 speed auto works brilliantly,
The 8HP is a great transmission when properly programmed. Even in my simple 2019 Ram 1500, it is a peach.
Gonna plagiarize a format we all might know because I have thoughts.
First gear: I’m fully in the “what in the actual fuck is going on at BMW Design” camp. full stop, no apologies. However, this car is good looking. The lights and front and rear graphics are a bit challenged, but that could be fixed in the LCI update. The M2s are tragic, don’t argue. It’s awful. I also don’t really care for the black rocker/lower trim (harder to see here). The shape of this car is still very nice.
Second gear: The gauges look great. If this were a video game. I don’t even know if you could get used to them if you owned it. They’re completely moronic. Also, how on earth are they a fix for the ones that debuted in the 8er that everyone hated? They’re worse?
Third gear: I’m sure it drives great. Nothing else to add.
Fourth Gear: I love Adrian. Please write more things.
Fifth Gear: That paint could slit my throat, piss on me and call my dad a racist and I’d still love it.
Reverse: Has anyone recently been behind an LCI X5/X7/probably all the current Beemers with the signals on (gasp!)? The ones that fade on then flash away, exactly the opposite of new Mazdas? They evoke a physical response, and genuinely actually make me nauseous. I don’t get it, but it makes my tummy hurt. Anyone else?
Thank you for your kind words. I’ve been insanely busy recently (teaching, Mera Luna, Italian GP, Goodwood) but now I’m back there will be more writing coming.
Now THAT is a nice purple!
Excellent article, a joy to read. The aftermarket for these will be nuts. As the owner of two tuned Audis, I’m gonna do my best to avoid lining up with one of these.
The only thing better than that deliciously deep purple paint is the name for it. “Thundernight Metallic” definitely sounds like a band I would check out.
When the press pack arrived and I saw it was Thundernight I had ‘Thunderstruck’ by AC/DC in my head on a loop.
Ah ahha AH ahha AH ah
I read the entire thing with that playing in my head.
There’s some pretty full-throated defense of BMW’s styling choices here for an article that includes no pictures of the front end.
With that said, after looking up was this car’s front end looks like, it’s… OK!
I’ve owned an E30, and an E36, and I now drive the previous generation (F22) M240i. It’s a blast to drive, being extremely fast, and it’s comfortable and it rides very well in comfort mode. There’s something to be said for a car that’s this much fun to drive but which my wife will ride in without complaining. While I can’t say I have any experience with the latest 2-series, I am confident that you’ve nailed this review, Adrian.
I don’t wank over old BMWs – I actually think the E39 and E46 are incredibly overrated 90s blobs that only get their high esteem because of some groupthink, knee-jerk dismissal of anything Bangle might have had a part in. In fact, the G20 3-series actually looks mostly excellent, and I’d rather look at it than the E46 if I’m honest.
That said, this thing is fuck ugly. In fixable ways – terrible lighting and chaotic front and rear fascias being the main culprits. This is the typical problem with most BMWs lately though – the overall body is fine but then you look at the front end and it looks either pre-crashed or like a beaver going through a bad divorce.
Have you DRIVEN or been close to any of those 90s blobs you so despise? I’m kind of guessing not.
We are talking about styling, and said blobs are hyped up endlessly for their looks. Which are generic ’90s blobs.
There’s an E46 M3 on my walk to work. I’ve known more than a few E39s in my time. A great driver’s car can be ugly. And those things are ugly.
They’re not blobs at all. They are restrained, minimal, handsome cars. If you want to see blobs go look at a ford or mazda from the same era.
As the owner of an E93, I think the E46 was gorgeous. It was also sorta reliable (cooling system plastics aside). But now, every automaker (looking at you Ford) has a lot of plastic in their cooling systems so, whadda gonna do? They all, from Acura to VW, have plastic encased thermostats w/ electrical connections the cost > $100 to replace.
I’m so confused by the headline…. If you are comparing it to the OG 6er, the M240 isn’t really junior as it is wider, higher, weighs more, and has a longer wheelbase. Even comparing it to the more modern 6er the size isn’t that much different.
Plus the M part of the headline…. Purist here, it shouldn’t have an M badge. I was shocked how many more M badges they put on the cars in EU vs the US, from my Scotland visit many years ago. It’s all Audi’s fault with their S Line, BMW & Merc gladly followed badging everything.
Full Real ///M or Nothing! Wish they made a M2 Comp Vert 6spd, would buy it in a second.
They would sell a metric fucktonne of those in the UK. We love enthusiast cars here, and despite our shitty weather we buy more convertibles than anywhere else on the continent.
Also I HATE the shortening of convertible to ‘Vert. It’s wanky ;P
Thanks for clarifying. So BMW makes products for all sorts of people in all sorts of places. Just not for me. I’m OK with that. They aren’t the only manufacturer out there.
I am, however curious, from your review, you didn’t mention if they have made any progress on functioning turn signals.
What turn signals?
It’s a Midnight Purple Mini Skyline! Which is fine. BMW already makes the Supra. Why not make a Skyline? Can’t wait till BMW presents the RX-7 in Competition Yellow.
They’re probably already working on the next gen Land Cruiser.
Minor editorial suggestion. I believe the correct expletive form is ‘simpering shit-flinging gibbons’ rather than ‘shit-gibbon’. Although there is precedent for its use since at least 2017, in reference to Daylin Leach’s diatribe opining the many charms of one Donald J. Trump:
https://www.yahoo.com/news/shit-gibbon-politicians-tweet-insulting-trump-raises-204008810.html
One can now even find it in the Urban Dictionary.
The general modus operandi of many captive great apes, is to assess their audience, and choose behaviors that make them go away. Chimps, gorillas, and gibbons, if they get tired of the attention, will defecate in their hand, and then chuck it at people who stare at them too long.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0veiTgUQLKw&t=17s
In most primate societies, staring at someone is considered a challenge. For which captive, highly intelligent primates, have devoloped just the right answer.
Fling a load of poo at ’em.
It got Grandma!
Priceless.
I love Adrian’s reviews…
FUCKING THANK YOU ADRIAN!
Are there currently some absurd looking BMWs? Absolutely. Is every single design they’re putting out terrible? Absolutely not. I’ve been saying since its debut that the current 2 series is a handsome car that properly evokes its history. I got sick of the kvetching about the design weeks after it was announced and folks are STILL frothing at the mouth over the M2 to this day.
I genuinely don’t get it anymore. BMW UGLY! has somehow become a part of enthusiast groupthink at this point and cars that don’t deserve it are catching strays. I’ve been up close and personal with these and I think they look great and distinctly BMW.
Second, everyone constantly bitches about iDrive 8 and you know what? It’s fine. I spent a couple hours in my dad’s new X5 50e over Labor Day weekend and I had everything figured out within a couple minutes. Sure, you definitely have to dig through some dumb menus here and there for certain functions, but it’s not the abject disaster that so many people make it out to be. The display, that has the appearance of a single screen, is absolutely gorgeous too. It’s stunning in person and the resolution is incredible…not to mention my 60+, tech averse father figured everything out with 0 issues.
I know a lot of us are fed up with excess screens and putting functions into them, and I myself am not fond of a lot of it. But the BMW interiors are a good example of how to implement it in a way that actually enhances the experience rather than detracts from it. And I don’t think I’ve ever driven anything that feels more solid than the current crop of Bimmers. They’re put together like Fort Knox…and I’ve driven a couple of current gen X5s and the current 3 series so I’m not just talking out of my ass here.
Anyway, I’d have one of these or an M2 (likely a 240i for reliability/fuel economy reasons as well as the purple) in my driveway right now if my wife wasn’t so staunchly anti-coupe and anti incinerating money on cars. The 2 series is a super compelling package that’s reasonably priced for what it is across the board, and I’m genuinely bummed out that enthusiasts are so mad about it.
BMW straight up gave us a 450 horsepower, straight 6, manual, rear wheel drive car in 2023 and everyone is complaining that it sucks. You can get into an M240i in the low 50s/mid to high 40s if you’re willing to buy used and it’s a genuine RWD platform powered by a B58 that publications have consistently hit 60 in under 4 seconds in that’s capable of getting over 30 MPG. And all people can talk about is that IT’S NOT A BMW!
*exhales deeply*
I’m thrilled that our cool goth uncle got one of these as a presser and did it justice. I’m far from a blind BMW apologist but the hate that these things are getting is so misplaced…and I’ll say it again: the current 2 series is a good looking car. Everyone will still be complaining that BMW DoEsN’t MaKe BmWs AnYmOrE ten years from now and cite the inline 6 powered 2 series variants as “some of the last true BMWs”.
Yeah. I saw some young UK based automotive media yahoo bitching about it on Twitter and I thought to myself he wasn’t even born when these cars were new. I quoted his tweet and said I was going to start arguing FOR the current BMW design direction if I saw much more of this nonsense.
I watched one of Sketchmonkey’s inane videos about the older BMWs (well I say watched, I made it a couple of minutes before I turned it off because I was going to punch my monitor) and I swear to god if I didn’t know better I’d have said he was cracking one out under the desk as he spoke. It was fucking nauseating.
No, this is still terrible, it’s just less terrible than what they’ve been putting out lately. You think it looks good because now you’re expecting them to look literally offensive, this one just looks busy/not cohesive/overstyled/trying too hard. The form has good proportions, and they didn’t make the kidneys 3′ tall so you think it’s attractive. It isn’t.
Adrain paints a masterful picture with his articles.
“…A subset of cars, consisting mainly of the E30, E36, E46, E39 and E38 (but curiously not the original E21 3 series) and a few other outliers, have been glorified and masturbated over to such ridiculous lengths by simpering shit-gibbons with BMW roundels tattooed on their dicks that any new one that doesn’t meet the untouchable perfection of earlier models is taking a giant steamy dump over everything that they worship, and how very dare BMW do that…”
That paragraph has more to unpack than the Kardashians on vacation. Well done, sir.
…and ‘simpering shit-gibbons’ is my word of the day!
How could he leave out the E34, best looking and handling 5-series of all time!
I got bored writing out all the code numbers.
I think part of the reason the E30/34/36/39/46 etc are worshipped is because when the chassis numbers mover on to new letters it was too much to remember.
My fifth BMW was an E86, and even by then there were too many numbers to remember. Not least because they started to give different ones out for the same car with a different roof or number of doors.
Tbf you didn’t see my packing for Mera Luna. My North Face Long Haul was denser than a fucking black hole.
Love love LOVE the purple!
BUT the hood gaps around the headlight! LOL
BTW, I like your writing style, even though I don’t always get the British humor. I bet it leads to some editing disputes in slack LOL
There’s a reel on Instagram about that headlight gap.
Oh, I know, that’s why I mentioned it LOL
This is the only modern BWM that I think genuinely looks good. If my life was a little different (no kids) I would really, really consider a 230i in that purple. Love the purple. They start at about 40k, which while still sort of eyewatering seems almost semi-rational this day in age for a fun commuter. I’m sure it’s probably a little nicer to live with than something like an FRS, for not a whole lot more money.
M240ixDrive Isn’t that what Elon Musk named his kid?
Almost undoubtedly, but there’s no way anyone can keep track of all of them. Especially Elon, so it might have been two or three of the kids with this name.
The instrument cluster looks like a future retro 1980’s video game. Not good in a car.
Yeah, that is terrible. Don’t they have any simulated 80’s M5 gauges for us olds?
Yeah I thought that MUST be an option somewhere in the configuration menu for the display. Nope. Easy OTA fix though.
Classic gauge OTA, $25/mo.
Haven’t read the article yet, but can we add a pic of the front end so that we can see it doesn’t have one of the new fucked up tall snouts? This one still has the much better fluidic space snouts and I’m quite happy about that.
Beat me to it – I scrolled through for a front end shot, left disappointed. The purple is drop-dead gorgeous though; it redeems whatever that pig-nose looks like.
Absolutely love the purple too! I previously owned one of those purple Ford Probes and I adored it so much I reveled in the “Fag” taunts I continuously received.
The Probe was a beautiful car, and the purple fit it well given its Euro character.
It was not the most sophisticated design, but those second (?) gen Probes that we got in Europe were very good looking cars. Probably a bit too slick and American for its intended market here, but still. Lovely looking things.
Funny thing was, here in the states, they were considered a quite European design. Shows what we knew I guess. The first gen one (I just saw one in the wild yesterday…haven’t seen one in maybe a decade!) was Taurus-y futuristic, but the second gen really nailed it IMO with the more muscular, sculpted curves.