The Pickup Trucks Are Too Tall! COTD

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The modern pickup truck is a wonderful, aggravating thing. On one hand, today’s trucks can tow practically tow houses and still get good fuel economy doing so. They’re also family cars, luxury cars, and even hot rods. Yet, the modern pickup is also annoying. Hoods are so high that you can’t see tall children and beds are so high automakers had to invent solutions so you could get into them.

Each of the Big Three has invented different ways to access beds, including multi-functional tailgates to different kinds of steps. David wrote about how he thinks Ford’s Pro Access Tailgate is the one to rule them all. The problem with all of this is that truck beds don’t need to be so tall. Trucks have gotten so big that I cannot even close the hood of a full-size pickup without assistance.

I’ve been out for a few days riding motorcycles through some California wine country, so I’ll nominate some COTDs from more than just today. Chronometric took my heart with this one:

There were some trucks from Detroit
Whose sides were too tall to exploit
Ford invented a gimmick
That the others did mimic
So the owners could be less adroit.

Today, Lewin wrote a review on the Alfa Romeo Tonale. It’s best described as “fine,” and the comments made me smile. Jack Trade points out how America’s views on European cars seem to be changing:

As a yank, I find it interesting how American’s perceptions of European marques seem to be changing as those marques penetrate our market more.

Even though the ’90s, we really got only the best here – top-end Mercedeses and BMWs, the sportiest Italian cars, etc. With pricetags to match, but in many of our minds, those cars personified a brand as a whole. For probably a majority of Americans, “Alfa Romeo” means only a lithe little convertible with a wooden steering wheel, probably in red.

Now, like with the Tonale, it seems we’re getting a much more varied experience that’s more in line with what the rest of the world gets…

BomberoKevino elaborates on this. We may think of a BMW 3 Series or a Mercedes-Benz C-Class as luxury cars here, but in Europe, they’re just common cars:

I distinctly remember my first trip to Europe (many years ago), taking a taxi from the airport in Germany and feeling amazed that my cheapskate college tuition paying parents had shelled out for a ride in a C series Benz. Then looking at the other taxis and realizing they were ALL Benzes and BMWs. Then looking at the doors and realizing they had roll-up windows just like our Toyota. Then it dawned on me that what I thought was the paragon of fancy was Europe’s Crown Vic. My parents were the people I thought they were, but the cars weren’t.

Have a great evening, everyone!

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20 thoughts on “The Pickup Trucks Are Too Tall! COTD

  1. Yep. Much too tall. Had a new Chevy 2500 tailgating me and it looked like an 18 wheeler in the rear view mirror. And it had an empty bed. Empty beds are unacceptable If you need a truck, use it! Oh, and “Over landing” equipment doesn’t count if you don’t use it. Lot’s of Gladiators and Tacoma’s with the look of unused equipment. Lame

  2. Too tall with very little ground clearance for the most part. Guess that’s what we get for turning working vehicles into luxury status symbols.

  3. I’m 6’6″ and pickups are too tall. Cut a bunch of firewood in the woods using Dad’s Colorado 4×4 this weekend. Even that seemed too tall at times.

  4. I find it funny that my 2002 Ram 2500 with 8′ bed used to be considered very large. But now I feel like a Ranger next to full size trucks

  5. I have a Torch-esque half baked idea to fix the problem of the truck sides being too high. Design running boards that have the capability to slide backwards towards the truck bed and lock into a notch on the rear bumper. It may have to articulate up first so it will line up with the bumper, but powered running boards that have similar capability are already a pretty robust technology. Then you have a platform to access the bed.

  6. Is it really fair to call parents that pay to send you to Europe cheapskates? Did they make you cross the Atlantic as a stowaway on a container ship or something?

  7. I have a lowered c10 that I actually use to tow and haul (crazy I know) but the lowered trucks are where it’s at, its so easy to reach over the bedsides and all of these fancy tailgate steps would be useless for me since I can just step in with the tailgate down already.

    1. I have a Jeep Comanche, haul everything with it and it and I can reach into any part of the bed with ease as a 5’11” guy. I can’t even see into some modern truck beds it seems.

  8. You know it’s bad when *flatbed* van-based pickups have lower load height than a modern full-size American pickup. Flatbeds, which have the entire bed at the height of the wheel wells on an American-style bed.

    1. Or are they not high enough?

      Personally, I’d find it amusing when I walk to supermarkets to see other people struggling with the factory-equipped rope ladder to ascend into the cabin of their trucks.

  9. Yup… People outside of North America have seen plenty of non-luxury Mercedes vehicles in the form of Taxis and trucks.

    It’s was still perceived as a ‘premium’ brand for quality, but not full-on luxury the way North Americans perceived.

    But these days, the taxis are not ALL Mercedes vehicles in Europe anymore because they don’t have the ‘under the skin’ quality/durability they used to have. Quality went downhill in the 2000s.
    https://web.archive.org/web/20190209180508/https://www.just-auto.com/news/mercedes-loses-grip-on-taxi-market_id74432.aspx

  10. My limerick ‘took Streeters heart’
    Oh my, where do I start?
    What an honor it is!
    If she thinks I’m a whiz
    Think I’ll get a ride in the Smart?

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