These Are The Five Car Controls That Should Never Be On Screens

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I think it’s safe to say that David’s recent review of the Tesla Cybertruck stirred up a shocking amount of emotion among our readers, Tesla fans, Tesla haters, and people who just wanted to say mean things to poor, sweet David. But that’s fine; that’s how the world works now, I suppose. For me, that review, especially the section about the Cybertruck’s user interface failings, reminded me that we’re currently living in an era when some genuinely bad ideas, human/car interface-wise, are happening. And we need to speak up. Specifically, we need to set some firm parameters regarding which controls can exist on a touchscreen display, and which ones should be forcefully and dramatically forbidden from existing in the flat, digital realm of a touchscreen. We need to be draconian about this, friends, because there are some very bad habits being set, and if we don’t nip this shit in the bud now, we could be plagued by annoying, useless, and perhaps even dangerous touchscreen-based controls for who knows how long. We must act.

I’ve picked five crucial controls that I feel have absolutely no business being on a touchscreen, and should be instead some manner of independent, physical control. I’m not including controls that are already legally mandated to exist separately and physically, like hazard lights, and instead am focusing on common controls that have been located on touchscreen interfaces, for reasons one can only guess at.

Okay, let’s get to it! I should warn those of you with high blood pressure or similar ailments to be wary when reading this list, as the act of imagining using a touchscreen for some of these things is maddening and could cause some manner of health issues, probably. Why take a chance?

Dashboard HVAC Air Vents

Teslaarirvents

This one I find especially baffling, because there really is no possible justification that can explain why anyone would actually want to adjust their vents like this. The current, accepted way to adjust air vents is perhaps technologically crude, but it works extraordinarily well: you physically move the vent itself to adjust the direction it blows air, either by tilting it up and down for vertical axis control, or sliding a little lever that controls the vanes on the vent, directing the air on the horizontal plane. Sometimes, the vent is round/roughly spherical, and you can just move it on both axes until the air is blowing in the direction you choose.

This method is incredibly quick and visceral and takes almost no actual thought or focus. You decide you want more air on you, so you reach out and physically move the thing blowing air until it blows on you. It needs no explanation, it’s understandable in the most basic, physical way, informed by all your years of being a physical being, living in a physical world.

When you move air vent controls to the touchscreen, you add a needless level of abstraction to everything. I can accept setting the specific temperature or choosing defrost/defog or dash vents on a touchscreen because those are generally less immediate and visceral controls, but I can never accept moving the vents themselves. I mean, is this really an improvement over physically directing vents?

Here’s a video of someone using the on-screen air direction controls:

All that fussy pinching and finger sliding, and, sure, the guy there seems enamored by the novelty of the process, but I’m pretty confident in saying that, no, this guy is absolutely wrong. This is in no way better. It adds layers of complexity and removal from the actual actions, you have to get to this at least one level down in a menu, so it’s not always available, unlike physical vents the passenger and driver can’t just adjust them simultaneously and at will whenever, you have to focus your eyes on the screen to do this – it’s simply idiotic. It’s not better.

It’s just not. And, sure, there’s some technological wizardry going on to allow for remotely-moved vents actuated by touching a screen, as is explained in-depth in videos like this one:

…but, let’s be real here, who gives a shit? Nothing of value is gained here over just basic dash air vents. Nothing. In fact, it’s far worse, because you have to take attention away from driving to do this simple thing that you used to be able to do immediately, any time, and just with touch. If you prefer touchscreen control for adjusting air vents, I suggest you seek your clergyperson or someone for help, because you’re deeply, irredeemably wrong.

 

Glove Box Latch

Volvo Touchglove

This one I’ve definitely bitched about before, because it’s a miserable crime against humanity. There is no good reason any human being should be opening a glove box remotely via a touchscreen. Aside from perhaps a bit of excitement that some physical event is happening sort of remotely, which may prove a thrill for Amish or unfrozen cave-person car buyers or people unfamiliar with the magic of a television remote, I can’t think of a single reason why one would choose a touchscreen control for opening a glove box over actually just using a latch right there on the glovebox door.

I actually confronted one of the designers of a car that uses this depraved setup, and this is how it went:

There’s no advantage here. There’s no benefit. There’s only complications, headaches, and potential new problems caused by this insipid idea. Let’s just decree that this should never happen again. Ever.

 

Gearshift

Img 7332

Again we find ourselves in the situation where even if a touchscreen shift interface was executed in the best possible way, it adds nothing of value to the shifting experience. The only reason this would be chosen is because a touchscreen shifter can save some money, but – and this is important – I don’t give a shit. Let those bigshot CEOs eat some dogfood every now and then like the rest of us. Like delicious Ol’Roy, which has real peas and carrots! It’s not worth the indignity of having to squint at some fussy little icons on a screen and drag your finger in a little rectangle of space like you’re cleaning something crusty out of the inside of a shot glass.

Here, listen to what David had to say about the Cybertruck’s on-screen shifter:

“None of these are as bad as the Cybertruck’s “shifter,” because at least these are three-dimensional shifters. They can be used without requiring you to take your eyes off the road, and they offer a positive engagement that makes it easy to know which gear they’re in. The Cybertruck requires you to look at the screen, press your finger on the little cybertruck icon in that small vertical shifter “column,” and then slide it up to go into drive or downward to go into reverse… The shifter works, and it isn’t confusing like some shifters can be, but I still struggle to find a worse transmission shifter in the automotive industry. There’s a reason why the Ford F-150 has stayed with its T-handle PRNDL shifter despite the fact that it takes up a bunch of space and doesn’t actually mechanically connect to the transmission: That’s what Ford’s customers want. They want a physical, substantial shifter. Ram went to a rotary dial, and that received a bunch of criticism, though I think most folks are used to that now. But this “shifter” in the Cybertruck? One with minimal feedback to tell you what’s going on and one that you cannot use without looking — it may work, but that doesn’t mean it’s not the worst of the bunch.”

No one wants to shift on the dumb screen. And, I think there must be some safety-related rationales for having physical shifting controls, because even Tesla has a duplicate set of shifter controls above their rear view mirror:

Teslashifter

Why’d they even bother with the silly on-screen shifter when they already had a shifting solution? This cramming shit onto the touchscreen, needlessly, is a sickness! A sickness!

 

Any Wiper Controls

Wipers Touch

This is another great example of touchscreen controls making shit more complicated for absolutely no good reason. The generally-accepted modern-car method of windshield wiper controls is via a stalk, usually working by a light touch causing the wipers to give one wipe, perhaps to clear off some splashed Kool-Aid if you’re driving past a location where that giant pitcher has just breeched the outer wall of a building, and then the other speeds are generally activated by moving the stalk up or down into however many notches you have, corresponding to wiper speed. Maybe there’s also a knob for setting intermittent wiper delay. That’s pretty much it, and in this common setup, everything is done via fingertips, and there really isn’t any visual component beyond actually seeing the wipers themselves doing their job. It generally just works.

And yet, in a car with some amount of wiper controls relegated to the touchscreen, the complexity level ramps up dramatically. Here’s an explanation of how Tesla wipers work:

Oy. How much of that was really necessary? Tesla does have some physical controls that can actuate the wipers, buttons or scroll wheels on the steering wheel, or previously, a stalk, but they still have the wiper  speeds on screen by default, which makes no sense at all. When you need to adjust your wiper speeds, it’s usually because there’s rain, which is when you really don’t want to be taking your eyes off the road in the first place. And, yes, you can customize the scroll wheel to handle speed of wipers, sure, but it all just comes back to why did they bother putting the speeds on an on-screen menu in the first place?

This wasn’t broken, it didn’t need to be fixed, and the world will be better once teams of hired goons work over anyone who tries to stick any wiper controls on a stupid touchscreen menu. You’ll see.

 

Volume Control

Volume

There’s never a reason to put this on a screen. Ever. It should always just be a big, easy-to-find knob. Volume is one of those things that you want to change on the slightest whim! What if the Emergency Broadcast Whatever comes on, with its shrill tone of alarm? Then you want to quiet that alarmist shit up, pronto! What if Radar Love comes on? Then you want to crank that shit, right-a-fucking-way! You don’t want to fumble around in some stupid touch menu, like a toddler on an iPad, you want to full-wristedly crank that knob so everyone can fucking hear that you’re driving all night, hands wet on the wheel.

And what about when you may be lost, and need to focus on directions? Then you need to turn that volume down, so you can think! What if you need to comically drown out whatever bullshit your passenger is going on and on about? Then you need to turn the volume up, at just the right time, perhaps over and over, as they get more and more frustrated.

Look, I know touchscreens are here to stay, and that’s fine. They have their place, they can do useful things. But if these five controls end up on touchscreens instead of having physical controls, so help me, when I’m Emperor of America I will find every motherfucker responsible for this society-degrading rot and throw them in my UX gulags, which will be entirely controlled by stupid, overly complicated touchscreens, from toilet flushing to blanket covering to ferrying food from plate to mouth.

Don’t test me!

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139 thoughts on “These Are The Five Car Controls That Should Never Be On Screens

  1. Yes. Thank you. I just had a 2024 VW Atlas for a loaner car and aside from the stupid HVAC controls being buried in a sub-menu, the lack of volume knob was infuriating. In order to mute audio you had to either swipe (an unlit bar) multiple times to lower the volume to mute OR use a shortcut on the touchscreen to mute audio. Either way, that’s at least two pushes of a touchscreen that you have to look at in order to operate JUST to turn off the audio.

    There’s also no way to mute audio on the steering wheel controls which – thankfully – are real buttons, unlike the hot mess haptic steering wheel in the Tiguan/Golf. Multiple clicks to turn off the radio that way too.

    Lack of a volume knob is a deal breaker for me now. Lack of real buttons for the heated seats is a close second. On the atlas, you had to “click” the heated seat “button” on the screen which didn’t do anything but bring up a secondary menu to click AGAIN on the heated seat icon to set the level. This stupid VW user interface is so terrible I won’t buy one unless it has real hard buttons.

    But haha to Tesla for making up the majority of the above list. Wipers and transmission on the touchscreen – yeah, that is a non-starter.

    Edit: I want to add to this just in case some VW engineer is listening: I was a hardcore VW fan. I’ve owned 4 VWs, 3 Audis and one Porsche. But if this nonsense touchscreen junk is still on their cars when I buy my next one, I’m moving to a different brand.

    1. LOL – I just wrote the same gripes about the Atlas, not having seen your post. Also a multiple serial VW owner. My ’17 GTI Sport actually had a touchscreen that I thought was about the best one could be. It pretty much ONLY worked the stereo, and even then, only things that were actually better using a screen, like scrolling though tons of music on a thumb drive. Everything else was simple, logical buttons and knobs. Then they made it worse for the ’18s, and now this ridiculous hot mess.

  2. When I attended the NY Auto Show a couple of months ago, I struck several VWs from consideration because they had the capacitive sliders for HVAC. The problems? 1. Greasy fingers making a mess. 2. Dry fingers stick/skipping across the surface when it’s clean. 3. While it is sort-of feelable because there are bumps at either end, you would have to LOOK OVER any time you use any other hard knob or button controls in that general area of the dash to be sure you *don’t* accidentally touch that “slider,” otherwise you’ll have to reset it to the way you want it set. So you’re prevented from using the actual physical controls while your eyes are on the road, as you should be able to do. And all of this would be exacerbated if, heavens forbid, you hit a bump while trying to adjust something.

    Then there were the VWs with nearly no physical controls. Sorry, ID.Buzz, even if you did bring the short wheelbase version to the US and I was confident about ability to charge it, the UI makes it a non-starter.

    1. I have eczema and frequently abraded or damaged skin, and frequently have problems using capacitive controls and fingerprint scanners. This overbearing assumption that everything is perfect all the time drives me fucking nuts, in addition to just being bad and needless in the first place.

      1. Sorry to hear that. I had similar issues.

        I might be able to offer you some hope though. I found my own skin issues were almost eliminated when I stopped exposing my skin to triggers and started to moisturize properly.

        My go to moisturizer is cooking oil. Olive, canola, vegetable, corn, whatever in my experience it doesn’t matter so use what you have or what is cheapest (although castor oil does have its fans).

        Try wearing surgical gloves with a few drops of whatever cooking oil you have to keep your skin really well moisturized for a few days, especially overnight. That should help your skin recover. I also have found the gloves and oil helps keep my hands from suffering from chapping in colder weather better than just winter gloves alone. They stay warmer too.

        If you do get a trigger on your skin wash it off ASAP and moisturize. That should minimize any flareup.

        Soap BTW is a trigger. Its job is to remove oil which it is very good at including all your skin’s natural oils which you need. Avoid using soap, or if you must, use as little as possible and make sure to follow it with cooking oil. Cooking oil itself however is an excellent cleanser. I use it in place of soap unless absolutely necessary. Its very good at removing even motor oil and bike grease and leaves your skin moisturized instead of dry, even when a bit of sugar is added as an abrasive.

        If you REALLY want to lean into this use oil instead of soap for bathing. People used oil for thousands of years before soap. Back then the idea was to rub oil everywhere and scrape it off with a device called a strigil. An old credit card works OK but you can buy a dedicated strigil for not a lot. I went old school, I have a bronze Roman recreation that is amazing.

        It’s kinda gross but it is remarkably effective, just make sure to collect the used oil and dispose of it separately as it will eventually clog pipes if allowed down the drain ( a chaser of enzyme cleaner might prevent this though). Use a dedicated oil towel to buff yourself dry. Its remarkable how much better it feels!

        Good luck.

          1. My wife puts hers on all the time even though it’s “automatic”. She wouldn’t have picked any car that had this work through a touch screen.

      1. Auto setting doesn’t work when the wipers are on (law here and good practice, anyway), construction zones, and roads where headlights are mandated due to frequency of crashes or something. There are also times they go on when I don’t want them on, like when they’d annoy people by shining through their windows at night.

    1. Three of my cars have auto headlights. But none of them are smart enough to turn the headlights on when the wipers are on, as required by law in my state. Nor have I ever driven a car that can do that despite having rented far too many in my constant work travels. There are also plenty of times when it’s just not dark enough for the auto lights to go on, but for various reasons you want them on – like construction zones where headlights are mandated.

      1. Lotta people telling on themselves with the “set it and forget it” mentality. I come across those people driving with no headlights in the rain or even driving with just DRLs in the dark because they have decided they just don’t need to pay any attention to one of their car’s most important safety features.

      2. that’s weird, my 2014 Peugeot does turn the lights on if they’re set to auto and it’s raining outside, the interior lights stay off and the screen stays on light mode, as it should

  3. Largely agree with these.

    Cars should largely be standardized such that anyone can get in them and use most/all essential functions on an immediate drive if needed. Familiarity is not an enemy.

    One of my litmus tests to see if the ergonomics and design of a car is acceptable is to see – within just a few seconds of entering a vehicle – how quickly I can turn off the radio, HVAC, turn on the wipers and defroster, and adjust the seat and steering wheel. So that even in one of the most unpleasant conditions – vehicle covered in snow/ice – how quickly and easily can I get the vehicle ready to drive. An alarming number of modern vehicles fail this. Badly. Very few pass, and that’s in spite of my familiarity in driving a mix of nearly every make and model on a regular basis.

    Gear selector: yep

    HVAC controls: Yes, and I’d add there should be a physical fan speed controller – and a rotating knob, ideally, at that, NOT a +/- button/lever. Sliders are also OK.

    Volume control: of course.

    Wipers and turn signals: while I get where some OEMs have come from with putting some controls on the wheel, I believe they should have redundant ones on stalks for the exact reasons David and others have mentioned: they DON’T turn with the wheel.

    Glove box release: at least there is a glove box. It’s frivolous not to have this be a physical handle (especially if the battery is dead and the owner needs to consult a physical manual, if it has one) but with cell phone coverage being what it is, and fewer OEMs including paper manuals, this is less egregious to me.

    Add: Physical door handles: there should always be a way to get into and out of a car even if it’s out of power without breaking anything

  4. The only one I kind of disagree with is the gear shifter. Touch screens are a problem because they require your to look at the screen and not the road. A vehicle is almost always stopped when shifting, so I am less concerned about having to look away from the road for this task. It sounds a bit annoying, but not a safety hazard.

  5. Model 3 owner here (let the hate begin LOL!). My thoughts on these 5 items.

    1) HVAC vents – for me, I’m okay with it, but I’m a “set and forget it” person. My wife is constantly changing the direction of the vents….one minute she wants it blowing on her face, the next minute, she doesn’t want it blowing on her at all. This design drives her nuts. Jason, you win this one, as the screen method doesn’t make this any better.
    2) Glove Box – I open the glove box so seldom, this isn’t really an issue for me. Plus, I can push the right scroll wheel and say “Open Glove Box”, and it opens for me; no screen required. But, I’ve always wondered why the extra expense to put a remote release for the glove box door was required. I call this one a draw.
    3) Gearshift – not applicable to my Model 3, I have an early version with the stalk mounted gearshift. I don’t think I’d like the gear selector to be on the screen. Definitely with Jason on this one.
    4) Wiper Control – initially, this drove me crazy. But, recent software updates have fixed this, at least for vehicles with stalks. On my car, a push of the button on the left stalk activates the wiper; press it quickly, and the wiper goes once. Hold the button, and the washer activates as well. When you hit the button once, then for about two seconds, the left scroll wheel changes the wiper setting from Off to Slow Intermittent to Fast Intermittent to Slow Constant to Fast Constant to Auto. So, changing it is as intuitive as any other car, once you get that command setting figured out. I think this is fine, but Tesla really needs to make the Auto function better; frankly, it sucks.
    5) Volume Control – This is fixed, the left scroll wheel changes the volume. Roll up, louder. Roll down, quieter. Press, mute. Press again, un mute.

    My biggest beef is that Elon and Tesla decided to change things for, what often seems, the sake of changing, rather than making it better. None of these controls work any better or worse than the “old” way of doing it. But, now that I’m used to it, when I get in my wife’s car (a Jeep Grand Cherokee), I have to think twice before I can do certain things, because it’s different. Is it better or worse? Nope, just different.

    My 2 cents worth…..

    1. this is a good point. Changing shit just to change shit is a sin. The only reason to move everything to the touchscreen is to make the interior look “minimalist” and “aesthetic” but the number of people who actually care about that shit is super small and most normal people realize that a car is a tool to be used and abused and not an interior designers hellscape.

    2. I also have a Model 3 with the original control setup. I agree with everything you wrote. I think the controls actually easy to use, although there was a bit of a learning curve at first. At this point, the only control I find problematic is the defogger. I don’t use it very often, so when it is required I have to think about it and look at the screen. Obviously, this is not great since I need the defogger due to having trouble seeing. That is a bad time for a distraction. Tesla should make this easier.

      I haven’t had the opportunity to drive one with the new control setup, but aside from shifting, it looks like the controls on the stalk have been replaced with buttons on the wheel. It doesn’t appear the touch screen is required any more than the current car, with the exception of the shifter. The control stalks are easy to use, but I think it be easy to get used to the buttons.

      Also, I doubt this is an issue of change for the sake of change. I’m sure eliminating buttons and stalks reduces production costs substantially. It may not make the cars better, but it probably makes them cheaper.

    3. I appreciate how the fixes are “make it closer to what it was before we not only broke it, but did so badly, thoughtlessly, and needlessly” (esp #4).

      I’m glad to hear it’s better, but Tesla wouldn’t know a good UX if it kicked them in the dick.

      1. Another Model 3 owner here. I find the ventilation controls to be very much set-and-forget. Pretty much the only thing I change regularly is the temperature, which is just a quick stab on the < or > symbol on the screen. Or I could press the steering wheel button and tell the car to make it warmer or colder.

        Sure there’s no reason for Tesla to do things this way, but it’s not problematic for a user.

        The glove box should have a button, no argument here.

        I’m happy to have stalks for indicators and gear selection in my car. I’d be fine with swiping the screen for D or R, but I don’t want buttons for the indicators thanks.

        Just to finish – I’m not by any means a fan of Mr Musk, but I am a fan of the designers and engineers he hired. My (China-built) Model 3 came with perfect paintwork, fit and finish. It’s had no issues in 18 months and it’s just a nice car to drive. I’ve got no illusions that electric cars will save the world, but I do like owning a car that charges at home from solar power rather than burning gas.

        (And I own a litre bike if I’m running short of adrenalin.)

    4. When you hit the button once, then for about two seconds, the left scroll wheel changes the wiper setting from Off to Slow Intermittent to Fast Intermittent to Slow Constant to Fast Constant to Auto. So, changing it is as intuitive as any other car, once you get that command setting figured out.

      How on Earth is this not inferior to having a stalk that you rotate to set the speed though? If I’m driving a rental car on the highway and it starts to rain I should not have to pull out the owners manual to figure out how to use a basic safety feature like windshield wipers. This is a perfect example of oversimplification to the point where it actually complicates the user interface.

      1. It’s different, not inferior. Cars already have essential functions in different locations; using your rental car example, every time I rent a car (pretty frequent, as I travel a lot for work), I sit in the lot and figure out where the headlight, wiper, cruise control, temperature, radio controls are. Because every car is different. Some better than others. Some more intuitive than others.

        Since I drive the Model 3 every day, the controls have become intuitive on that car. So much so that when I get in my wife’s Jeep, I turn on the wipers every time I try to shift into drive (right hand stalk)

        1. At the very least it’s two inputs to accomplish one thing, instead of flicking a stalk or turning a dedicated knob. Never mind the fact that it’s completely unintuitive and no one would ever figure it out unless they were told how it works.

  6. While I can agree with most of these, I must insist that defoggers have actual buttons. Some of these are stupid but rather harmless (why do I need to use a touchscreen to open the glove box? I don’t know, but I also don’t know why I’d need to open the glove box while driving). Defoggers though. That’s a safety concern.

    1. One of the recent “trapped in a Tesla” stories had the trapped person, unable to open the door because power was off. they were also unable to look up the emergency release because the screen had no power.

      1. That’s operator error. It’s very clear in the manual how to get the door open without the battery. But, that doesn’t help if the person trapped is a child or somebody who isn’t familiar with the car. However, I will say that the manual door release is actually in a more intuitive location than the electric button; so much so that, when a new person rides in my Model 3, I tell them in advance where the button is to electrically open the door so that they don’t use the mechanical latch to open it.

        A bigger flaw is that there is no emergency release on the back doors, at least on my early production vehicle (2018). I think they fixed that for later cars.

        By the way, all cars with electric door latches have this “flaw”. Try to figure out how to open the doors on a Corvette without electricity. It’s not nearly as logical as a Tesla.

        1. A handle has been solving these problems nicely for *checks watch* a good century now. There have been bad handles, absolutely, but goddamn Tesla’s point-and-click adventure game approach to “would you like to leave the vehicle” should be illegal.

          I’m not mad at you, I swear. I’m frustrated that having to explain how to open doors is a conversation we’re having to have after a great many decades of never having to explain this.

        2. They said they couldn’t look up the procedure in the manual because the screen was dead, meaning they couldn’t open the glovebox because that’s a touchscreen feature. That’s design error stupidity.

        3. How many people have read their car’s manual in enough detail to know where the door emergency release is? I work in software I know how many people read a manual in that much detail.

          Door handles are usually so obvious they don’t need explaining. The behavior doesn’t change over time, a door handle opens a door. It’s not like I have a different process to get out of my house when power goes out.

          But instead you had to reinvent the Airline safety briefing for every one who gets in your car. Imagine how many people sit in the back seat of a Tesla used for ride share, do *ANY* of them get told how to get out in an emergency?

          BTW, I agree with you, the Corvette electric door release is also stupid. It has killed people.

            1. Okay, found one case of a 73 year old man who couldn’t figure out how to open the door on his 2010 (I think) Corvette. This occurred 9 years ago. I stand corrected.

    2. My wife (as a passenger) opens the glove box a lot while we’re driving to get something out of it (Kleenex, hair brush, nail file, etc.).

  7. I have a Volvo C40 EV. While the temp and seat heater controls are on the center screen, they are always in view at the bottom; you can also use the in-car voice control to change them.

    Turn signals, lights, wipers, or the volume control all are physical stalks or knobs. The front and rear defroster also have hard buttons below the screen. There’s a standard Volvo “transmission” selector in the center console. The glove compartment is a manual pull, just like the doors.

    It may not be as exciting a UI as some other manufacturers, (I mostly use CarPlay), but it is functional and does everything I need.

  8. In the spirit of the well thought out debate that occurred with David’s article, I can unequivocally say: Torch, you are wrong. Go back to your cave and cry into the money that “big button” gave you. You should be ashamed to be alive. We are going to cancel you.

  9. 2017 Model S owner here, 350,000 KMs in… and I am very very happy with my car partly because in addition to the giant iPad I have stalks and vents and buttons and steering wheel controls Oh My! None of them take my eyes off the road, all are muscle memory, and all just simply work.

    I have test driven the new Tesla range (well the new S, Y and 3 – I would stay with Tesla because it is a great car overall and nothing touches the supercharger network) and made the choice to stay with my old S in large measure because of the “everything all screen all the time” shenanigans. Oh and subscriptions! No thanks. I loved being an early adopter but I do not like where most new cars have gone UI-wise. I could blame Tesla for starting it, but I do think that Volvo Robin up there is probably right – the consumer is now driving this. The pendulum will likely come back to logic though, right? RIGHT? Please let it be so.

  10. Hm. Wondering how hard it would be to start making analog dash bits for these as an aftermarket accessory.
    Plug it in to the OBD port and do a setup. Mount the accessories to the interior, such as a gear lever that notches and clicks, turn signal pod with real stalks, a faux am/fm radio with adjustable knobs, analog dial gauges over the screen-for-a-dash, toggle levers and push button switches for the lights and signals, locks and powered trunk/hatch….

  11. I rarely use the volume control on my steering wheel, preferring the knob. Honestly, I use the one time wipe function on my stalk more than interval in light rain, I wish interval had a slower speed. Stalk is the best way for wipers.

    1. My wifes Mini has infuriating steering wheel controls when it comes to music so I default as well to the knob. Who decided that left and right were volume up and down, and down would be skip to next song?!

    1. As Torch said, “I’m not including controls that are already legally mandated to exist separately and physically, like hazard lights“.

  12. I absolutely hate the fact that adjusting the cabin temperature is on screen, and switching on the recirculation is buried in several menus on my ’23 330i. Add to that you can adjust everything with the iDrive controller *except* the cabin temperature! I’ve got a bit of OCD about fingerprints, so I leave the temperature at 66 and never change it.

    Want to turn on the heated seats? Have to go to climate settings. I just leave them on all the time at this point…

  13. #6: Ejector seat.

    After all, if you need to get rid of a (probably unwanted) passenger in a hurry, the last thing you want to do is dig through a bunch of GUI menus, giving them a chance to notice what you are up to.

  14. Agree wholeheartedly with most of these. In particular, doesn’t adjusting the vent remotely mean that there are servos/mechanical stuff that can break as part of the vent? Why…just why?

  15. I hadn’t read the Cybertruck review… and… hadn’t realised how many controls had been moved to the screens. Things that I never would have possibly thought would be there.

    I drive a 2023 car but that is still quite analog (HVAC controls are fully physical and would keep them like that). I would also like volume and on/off media controls physically separate (it has the satellite control out of a Mk1 Scénic, but that’s not enough).

    Oh, in my car there are physical controls for the windows, cruise control, etc. But they are idiotically laid out which makes you wonder what the hell they were thinking about. But I guess that is a story for another day.

  16. I agree with 4/5 of these, I’m ambivalent about the shifter, especially in an EV with a single gear where you’re really just selecting fwd/rev. That said, I love the idea of ceiling buttons for those functions! I’m just a fan of ceiling buttons in general. After 40+ years any time I reach up to hit a button on the ceiling I feel like Michael Knight! In fact as stupid as it is you could put the glove box release on the ceiling and I’d be tickled pink! PUT ALL BUTTONS ON THE CEILING!!! 🙂

    1. I first went to pilot rather than Michael Knight, but either way, bad ergonomics should only be okay if adequately cool, and ceiling-mounted switched are absolutely cool in a way modern touchscreens will never be.

    2. I’m with ya. I would also accept rows of toggle switches, esp with lights above. Ceiling or dash.

      “You better hope the old man disabled the tractor beam or it’s going to be a real short trip…punch it Chewie!”

    3. Can they be hefty metal toggle switches on the ceiling? Because that’d be brilliant.

      And make the park-release a red safety cover over its toggle?

      1. Metal toggle switches with indicator lights, plastic rocker switches illuminate when activated, and push buttons that illuminate when activated are all on the approved list.

        1. Related, can I also note that so far, I’m also disappointed that there don’t seem to be a lot of people speaking directly into their Apple watches at a very close distance?

          “Find a way in and come get us!” “Right away Michael.”

          1. I was an early adopter of the very first Android Wear watches when they first came out (over a year before the Apple watch) and any time I talked into my watch people would react in amazement. I could always tell their generation based on if they called me Dick Tracy, Michael Knight, or Inspector Gadget.

            Then Apple released their watch and it became commonplace and now nobody cares when you talk to your wrist.

  17. The ’78 LTDII coupe I owned in high school had one dash vent on a gimbal. You could rotate AND set the vents exactly where you wanted it. Did little good with no AC of course, but it’s the thought that counts. BTW I hated the dash knob mount wiper control setup, but it did have interval wipers.

  18. I can’t really argue with this list. I would be willing to trade out wipers for HVAC controls if the wipers were the best auto wipers on earth and completely in sync with my thoughts on how I want my windshield wiped.

    I’m sure some will say most steering wheels have volume controls and maybe they could live without a knob, but I would argue you still need a knob for super fast control. Steering wheel volume controls are great for fine adjustment.

    1. No auto wipers I have ever tried have worked properly. The best ones in German cars, but still not quite perfect.

      Also there are indeed volume controls in steering wheels… but then you have capacitative buttons like those on the W206 C-Class, which make precision volume adjustment impossible.

    2. For me, the steering wheel radio buttons get activated when something happens where I change my grip on the wheel. Then say WTF did the radio come on? Only intentional use is when I’ve got a USB stick with music in, to skip to the next song.

  19. Unpopular opinion, but I don’t think the tach or speedo or fuel should be digital either. Those are mission critical gauges that need instant feedback, and even the best digital meters have a semblance of lag.

    1. You have to go back pretty far for real gauges. For about 30 years or so the ECU has been positioning those old “analog” physical gauges too.

        1. But I still dig the idea. There’s something wonderfully enthusiast-like about a lone analog gauge next to a bunch of screens. Like how Mad Max cars will often have only one or two gauges in them.

    2. There’s also no depth. No matter how cool they might be designed to look (they aren’t), it’s just another layer of make-believe that can’t compare to a real 3D gauge, even a simple one.

    3. Not only that, most are needlessly skeuomorphic and at low enough resolutions they still don’t look like the real thing. So esthetically they’re a step backwards. And for whatever reason, manufacturers are content with merely replicating the analog gauge instead of making the most of what a programmable digital display can do, E.G. show speed differently depending on the user’s preference (E.G. gauge, Citroen bubble, horizontal bar, just the mph digits, “skins” or themes with different typefaces and colors, etc).

      1. You could make the same argument for wipers, but when you gotta override you gotta override immediately and with zero fuss in both cases.

        1. Haven’t touched the auto lights in any of my cars for a long time… including once when they refused to work and stayed on without the possibility of engaging the high beams or fog lights (and it was a very foggy night…). French electronics I guess.

          But yeah, in any case I would agree.

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