“Don’t get me started,” amirite? As we can all attest, it’s just about impossible not to encounter ding-dongs of varying levels of ding-dongosity whenever one ventures out onto the roads. No matter how brief the trip, you’ll probably have at least one interaction with another motorist that causes you to experience at the very least mild dismay, at the very most complete brain-bogglement — or, somewhere in between, annoyance and full vein-throbbing outrage.
Obviously, what you want to do in these situations is yell, “HAY, watch it!” (top image) and floor it while holding the horn button down (bottom image). It’s in the manual. Image: Etsy seller
Hopefully we’re all able to keep our emotions in check while we’re on the road (unhinged is never a good look), but it’s only human to feel frustrated when the other drivers you’re counting on to be safe, aware, and courteous (or at least not-dangerous) aren’t holding up their end of the bargain. And so we ask, what bad behaviors do you find most irksome when you’re behind the wheel? Obviously street racing, drunk-driving, or otherwise being willfully reckless are total no-goes–we’re talking about the day-to-day stuff isn’t wantonly illegal but just makes you nuts. Like driving down the street with daytime running lights and no taillights. Come on!
To the comments!
Top image: Guillermo Spelucin/stock.adobe.com
In general, overt and obvious phone use along with the “hurr durr, what’s a blinker?” attitude irritate me quite a bit as it’s something I see everyday. However, the thing I’ve noticed on my commute several times in the last couple years is some truly abject dumbassery.
Tablets. Not the Tesla or some latest model crossover with one stuck on the dash. Nope, I’m talking about holding a regular old iPad or some similar such device in one hand while driving with the other. The fact that I’ve witnessed this more than once makes me think maybe that auto-driving thing needs to speed the hell up for some folks.
The absolute worst of that bunch was a lady driving a shitbox silver Pontiac Sunfire I saw one morning drifting all over her lane. I thought she was drunk for sure, but then when I pulled up next to her I could see she was holding her tablet and the steering wheel with her right hand because her left hand was holding a cigarette which she was periodically flicking out the partially rolled-down window. I laid on the horn while next to her three times only to receive jack-all for a response. FFS. It’s the only time I’ve been tempted to pit-maneuver someone.
A new one I’m encountering more seems to be EVs in single pedal mode and the regen set to max taking no notice of traffic behind them.
Coming up a ways off from a light it turns yellow. In an ICE this would be a coasting situation until either stopping for the light or re-accelerating from a minimally reduced speed when it changes through to green. Instead, said EV immediately nose dives with no brake lights or other warning, then creeps forward at 10 or 15mph because the driver still has to move up to the light.
Everyone behind has just wasted all the energy from that momentum. They’ve wasted some too, but less. If you want to be captain regen on an empty road, have at it. On a crowded road, don’t.
The number 1 that drives me crazy is tailgating on a flowing two-lane at a good rate of speed when there is a line of cars in front and no way to pass. What’s the point?! Can’t count the number of times have I almost been rear-ended by someone late for work or home because I had to slow and they’re not paying attention.
Lots of comments from others I agree with that are irritating, just let it out…
This happens to me every day on the way home. There are even large hills that the tailgater can see that the two lane road is full ahead. Where do they think they will go?
Semi trucks micro-passing on two lane interstates. Assuming it isn’t just being done to intentionally annoy other drivers, is it really that important for the truck governed at 65 to spend 5 minutes passing the truck governed at 64.9?
This is my very, very least favorite thing. Driving interstate 81 from PA through VA is an absolute chore because of this. VA in particular, it’s mostly 70mph limits, rolling hills, and nobody gets anywhere near the limit because Truck A takes 6 miles to pass truck B. It’s infruriating.
You have been through Iowa, I see.
I split my time between Northern Virginia and Southside Virginia. The traffic behavior between the two is completely different when the light turns green. In NOVA, the drivers in front know there’s a bunch of people behind them who want to make it through before the light turns red. However, in the Southside, people are as slow as they are dimwitted. As long as they mosey through the light, they don’t give a shit who else behind them doesn’t make it through. Self-awareness is a learned skill.
I call this “rubber band driving” wherein the car in front is attached to the next with an imaginary rubber ban that needs to stretch out to start pulling car #2 forward, which is connected to car #3 the same way and I’m in car #4, staring at the green light unable to make forward progress for 15 seconds while the imaginary rubber bands stretch out enough to get the cars moving.
Just generally, inattentiveness and being an asshole.
But my most loathsome subcategory of asshole is the bully in a bro-dozer (or large truck generally) driving in an apparent fit of petulant aggression and intimidation.
My single biggest and potentially region specific one is when someone uses an empty bike lane, a left turn only lane, empty street parking spaces or something like that to try to get around traffic at a light…then when the light changes they smash the throttle to try to cut off the leading car. It is beyond obnoxious, it’s dangerous, and on a good day it’ll save you maybe 5 total seconds.
It’s also seemingly taught during drivers ed in the state that produces the most toxic drivers in the US…Maryland. I live in DC as you all know and to say we’re tortured by the drivers from that state on a daily basis would be putting it lightly. They become lawless antisocial kamikazes the second you put one of them behind the wheel. I would legitimately make it illegal for any of them to drive on DC roads if I could.
I’m being dead serious. Hit the DC border, park your car, proceed to a ride share or public transit. And their stupid ass state doesn’t have ticket reciprocity with us so they can’t be held accountable for any of their crimes against humanity. You know….on second thought maybe my answer is just Maryland drivers in general. They’re a scourge.
But I digress. Other than that I’d say a few others I loathe are not using turn signals or waiting until the absolute last second to use them (I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve missed a light because some doofus didn’t signal they were turning left until they were in an intersection), panic switching lanes rapidly, and hanging out in peoples’ blind spots. I swear that normies have some weird affection for sitting in blind spots. It seems like as soon as they reach mine they just hit the cruise control and hover there for miles…
Maryland is in fact, very bad. They certainly give Massholes a run for their money.
Extremely shitty behavior like this tends to be found anywhere with a culture of “half the population lives an hour and a half of interstate travel from where they work”. Everyone becomes so desperate to shave seconds to minutes off their soul sucking commute, even seemingly at the risk of injury/death. It’s ridiculous.
I’ve driven around a lot of major cities in the northeast, NYC/Boston/Philly/DC, and they all have a reputation of being difficult to drive through. But in reality, I never have an issue driving IN the city. It’s outside the city where the commutes of desperation are that you find the worst drivers.
Worst around where I live:
Leaving 2+ car lengths between cars at a stoplight when traffic is backed up for 2 miles. You realize that 2 miles could be 2/3 of a mile if every car wasn’t taking up as much space as 3 cars, right?
Clogging up one lane and leaving one open instead of zipper merging
Cars in a roundabout stopping for cars that aren’t in roundabout.
People stopping in the middle of the flippin road and waving people in. If traffic needed to be stopped, there would be an officer stopping traffic. Your vigilante traffic management isn’t helping anybody.
Making a left turn into the center lane when there’s a big ass gap in the proper lane, meaning there’s no reason whatsoever to turn into the center lane.
Taking forever to get moving when the light turns green. You should endeavor to pull away at exactly the same moment as the car in front of you.
Resting their foot on the brake pedal, turning on their brake lights and misleading everybody behind them. The lights come on when your foot touches the pedal at all. Do not turn on your brake lights if you’re not actually braking.
Riding brakes in general
Doing a boosted launch away from a stoplight, leaving me in your dust, and then cruising at 40mph while I pass you cuz I actually drive the speed limit when there’s no reason not to
So much this. I’m a strict adherent of zipper merging and will gladly use the ending lane to its full potential, merging only at the very end. (When traffic is slow and necessitates the full use of all lanes, of course.)
So often will the other drivers actively block the merging. I’m in NYC so I will gladly return the a-holeness in kind.
Idiocy and a-holeness is like flies and shit.
#4 Cutting off the cute little Fit because bullying is fun.
#1 With lights that can be red for 2.5 minutes, those folks ahead of you whose texting makes them sit and not pay attention when they turn green.
#2 Pull out in front of me so I have to hit the brakes and then proceed at 10 mph below the speed limit.
#3 “Oh look, the light is green, let me hit the brakes.”
Most have been mentioned:
Phone use while driving at high speeds
Left lane slowpokes
Failing to signal
Being unable to keep a constant speed even though there is little traffic
Cutting across multiple lanes of traffic and almost causing accidents so they don’t miss a turn or exit ramp.
One I’ve noticed more recently is speeding up to cut off someone from changing lanes. Traffic is flowing well, there is plenty of space but as soon as someone signals to change lanes the person that would be behind then speeds up to prevent them from changing lanes. Once again, there was plenty of space, they weren’t going to be inconvenienced but decided to make things dangerous. Usually middle fingers are exchanged and I’ve seen a couple of road rage incidents start this way.
I live in FL, so I’ve long since given up on folks who want to conserve their blinker fluid at all costs.
Another one: People who hit a traffic jam on the freeway, make their way through it, and then continue driving 20 mph below the speed limit for 5 miles after the traffic loosens up. Often in the left lane.
WHY?
A lot of this boils down to being oblivious to those behind you.
One that probably won’t make the top 10 but which annoys the hell out of me is someone who goes 10 mph below the speed limit until they get near a stoplight that’s just turned yellow, and then they speed up so that they just make it through and I am stuck at the red light.
All highway related:
-Camping in the left lane (obvious one).
-People who are passing on the highway, pull in front of you, and then randomly speed up and slow down. User your f#$%^&* cruise control!
-People who are passing on the highway and pause in your blind spot. Just pass me damn it!
-People who speed up when you’re trying to pass them. I drive a Jeep so it’s a bit tougher for me to just floor it and get in front of them. And then they slow down once you’re in front of them!!!!
-People driving on the highway with their brights on behind you. Day and night.
Related to number 3, how about people who pace you on highways?
In my mind, my drivers ed instructor Mitch is still there, sitting in the passenger seat of his ’70s Dodge Dart, shouting “leave yourself an out!” So it always irks me when someone is right next to me on a highway for miles, when there’s otherwise no reason for it.
Disregard/disrespect for pedestrians. For example, boxing pedestrian crossings (don’t enter the intersection if you can’t clear it, idiot!), pulling out of driveways across sidewalks without stopping and looking (it’s an implied stop sign), not giving pedestrians right of way in intersections and crossings, parking on and blocking sidewalks. I could probably list a whole lot more, but I’m still in a good mood at the moment…
“parking on and blocking sidewalks”
This one irks me the most when I’m walking my dogs, and have to step into the street to get around. It goes against their years of training not to go in the road.
I would climb through the car, but unfortunately most people lock them these days.
Here’s an EV specific issue: Tesla owners using non-Tesla charging stations, WHEN THERE’S A DAMN TESLA SUPERCHARGER A MILE AWAY WITH AVAILABLE SPOTS. This has happened to me several times, most recently in Estes Park, CO this past Monday. It was only the knowledge that they have “sentry mode” that kept me from keying the fuck out of those two dark blue Model 3’s…
Camping in the left lane is the clear #1 answer.
It will be interesting to debate 2nd place.
Most highways near me are completely inverted. So many people, trucks, etc. camp in the left lane, that the only people actually in the right lane are the faster drivers trying to pass. It’s absurd.
Related: drivers merging onto a nearly empty freeway making a beeline for the left lane. There is nobody in front of you as far as you can see, so why the hell do you feel the need to be anywhere but the right lane?
Not this question. Why right now.
It’s my wife and I’s anniversary.
I have things to do.
Getting into a turn lane too late.
So now your cars ass is taking up two lanes and me and everyone behind me have gotta wait till you can go.
There are lines painted on the road. Use them.
1- driving in left hand passing lane when not passing (compelling others to pass on the right)
2- stopping in front of other traffic to wave me out from a side street. safety is affected by predictability – noone can predict this behavior. as an autopian commented above – we cant see your hand gestures. just drive YOUR car and let ME worry about me.
3- not signaling turns. i coulda gone if i knew you were gonna turn
4- cutting in front of me then driving slowly
5- driving slowly until there’s a passing zone and speeding way up to stay in front of the parade.
6- illegal equipment intended to disturb others e.g. loud pipes, lifted trucks without corresponding adjustments to headlights. coal rollers etc. ad nauseum
Drivers going through a red light (almost always a right on red) despite a pedestrian being in the crosswalk… and then rolling down their window to yell at the pedestrian.
I always assume the worst, so this has only happened to me once or twice, but I witness this at least 2 to 3 times a week. Saw it today walking back from the supermarket. Old woman, clearly had trouble walking. Bearded dude rolled down his window and gave her a helluva earful for no reason. Again, wanted to turn right on red, despite in this case a “NO TURN ON RED” sign.
Best one was a month or so ago where someone literally screamed at a CROSSING GUARD WHO WAS LETTING KIDS CROSS THE STREET.
A more recent trend I’m seeing is people stopping 1 to 2 full car lengths short of the intersection/crosswalk.
There’s a line right there for you! Stop at it nor 20 feet back, ya weirdo!
Constantly tapping brakes or riding the brake pedal on the highway when you just want to slow down a little bit, instead of simply taking your foot off the accelerator
Not maintaining a consistent speed on the highway, but constantly slowing down/speeding up +/- 10-20mph
Tailgating in the right lane instead of just passing
Slowing down almost to a total stop in the lane of travel to make a turn, instead of moving into the turning lane and slowing down there
Not using turn signals when turning
Not using turn signals while changing lanes
Merging into traffic without using the on-ramp to get up to the speed of traffic
Dangerously cutting across lanes to catch an exit at the last minute instead of just accepting you missed it and moving on
Changing lanes then immediately slamming on the brakes in front of the cars you just moved in front of
Interpreting proper following distance as an opening to merge tightly into
Not turning on headlights when it’s dark
Using emergency flashers while driving, because it’s raining
Proper following distance as a concept seems more or less dead (excepting us here I mean) in urban areas and local highways. It only seems to exist on trans-state arteries anymore.
When I’m at an intersection/light and I turn right…and the car directly across from me is turning left and they turn left without yielding to me (or any car turning right). It appears they don’t teach this law anymore and it’s infuriating, I cannot count how many times I’ve had to stop while turning right, to avoid this driver turning left. Total incompetence.
All these idiots on their phones…also don’t even try to hurry me- go around. I don’t have to break the law for you- especially any moron who says “keep up w/ flow of traffic”-if it means speeding, it’s still speeding…also anyone who leaves multiple car lengths empty in front of them at a light- you are a stupid bane to society