We all contain multitudes, don’t we? That’s from the title of a novel I’ve never read and if I’m honest I don’t really get the significance of, but somehow it seemed like a good way to start this, because all of us as car lovers do have multitudes of ideas and feelings about all sorts of cars. And alongside the cars we love and admire and hate and revile there are those cars that, while they may not be our favorites, they’re cars that we feel strangely protective about. Cars that we have to speak up and defend when we hear them maligned, because deep down we know they deserve better.
I suspect we all have cars like this, leaking oil in the parking lot of our mind. Cars that we find ourselves in a genuine argument defending, as part of our brains float up and above, watching the conflict, wondering, hey, how did I get here? Why am I yelling at a dude for talking shit about a car I’ve never even owned? And yet here we are.
Mercedes told me for her that car is the Smart ForTwo, and I get that. She’s owned several, and they’re often the target of ridicule, undeserved, I think. For me, I think there’s two: the Fiat 500L, which I’ve defended on these very pages, and also the Yugo, which takes an extraordinary amount of bullshit from the world at large, and I think, needs me to defend it.
I once made a whole video defending this car, which I now own:
Man, now I’m getting worked up again, just imagining all the slights and eye rolls and dismissive comments that Yugos and 500Ls are inspiring, just by being mentioned. But I don’t think I’ll ever stop defending them.
Why am I like this? Who the hell knows? But I bet I’m not alone. I bet almost all of you have some sort of car you will always defend, and I want to know what they are, and why they make you feel the way you do, and how you defend them – everything. I want to know everything, always, forever.
So please tell me.
The Kia Soul. I ended up with one a few years ago and while it wasn’t my first choice and honestly my bar was set really low, it’s been a good car. It’s small but spacious and practical, gets decent gas mileage, has so far been dead reliable, and it’s basic like few modern cars are (which in my eyes is a plus). People talk a lot about how they want a practical, affordable hatchback in the modern market. To that I say here it is!
The Kia Soul. I ended up with one a few years ago and while it wasn’t my first choice and honestly my bar was set really low, it’s been a good car. It’s small but spacious and practical, gets decent gas mileage, has so far been dead reliable, and it’s basic like few modern cars are (which in my eyes is a plus). People talk a lot about how they want a practical, affordable hatchback in the modern market. To that I say here it is!
P38 Range Rover.
Despite their reputation as the “worst Range Rover”, they are built like tanks and the later Bosch ones in particular are quite good. A great mix of the old-school Land Rover experience (and the last RR with the Rover V8) while still being modern and luxurious enough to drive regularly. They also aren’t prone to rust like the Classics and Discos. I have a huge soft spot for these and love my ’01 4.6 HSE.
First-gen Cayenne would have been my other answer (I have an ’04 S), but they are finally starting to get the recognition they deserve.
P38 Range Rover.
Despite their reputation as the “worst Range Rover”, they are built like tanks and the later Bosch ones in particular are quite good. A great mix of the old-school Land Rover experience (and the last RR with the Rover V8) while still being modern and luxurious enough to drive regularly. They also aren’t prone to rust like the Classics and Discos. I have a huge soft spot for these and love my ’01 4.6 HSE.
First-gen Cayenne would have been my other answer (I have an ’04 S), but they are finally starting to get the recognition they deserve.
996
It’s the best 911, particularly the mk1. The last 911 before the major bloat and the one that saved the brand along with the Cayenne and Boxster. Drive one. It’s like driving a Miata compared to a 992
996
It’s the best 911, particularly the mk1. The last 911 before the major bloat and the one that saved the brand along with the Cayenne and Boxster. Drive one. It’s like driving a Miata compared to a 992
ICE cars
ICE cars
The citroen c15 van. I have never owned one,but when I see one I can’t help but walk over and look at it. I think it because they’re such enthusiastic little car up for anything.
The citroen c15 van. I have never owned one,but when I see one I can’t help but walk over and look at it. I think it because they’re such enthusiastic little car up for anything.
The 91-01 Explorer. Get called Jeeps (F’u), Exploders, Soccer mom SUVs, rollover hazards, etc.
Yes, the had a Firestone recall, yes they had a potential for timing chain rattle from the 4.0 SOHC, yes they had cheap interior plastics.
But man, they were the backbone of the American SUV movement and sold millions. There were 3 badge engineered variants, could be had in 2 door or 4 door; v6 or V8; 2wd, 4wd, or AWD; Manual or Automatic.
And these things are great off road!
The 91-01 Explorer. Get called Jeeps (F’u), Exploders, Soccer mom SUVs, rollover hazards, etc.
Yes, the had a Firestone recall, yes they had a potential for timing chain rattle from the 4.0 SOHC, yes they had cheap interior plastics.
But man, they were the backbone of the American SUV movement and sold millions. There were 3 badge engineered variants, could be had in 2 door or 4 door; v6 or V8; 2wd, 4wd, or AWD; Manual or Automatic.
And these things are great off road!
I get a lot of “I worry about you” based on what I’ll go to bat for and/or want. The biggest one is the Lancer, though. Boy oh boy, does everyone love to give me grief for the Lancer. I get asked why I haven’t replaced it yet, hear “that’s not an Evo, so it’s bad” too often, hear about the state of Mitsubishi at the moment (as if that’s my fault? I can’t defend that), and blah blah, blah blah blah. It’s a great car, though! It will probably outlive most of its doubters.
My previous answer probably would have been the Cayenne, but for better or for worse, the internet seems to have caught on that Cayenne is always the real answer.
I’m no auto journo like yourself, but I do get blank stares when I defend the Lancer’s poverty-stricken little brother, the Mirage. For what it is: ugly, ungainly, and badly proportioned, it’s also reliable and infinitely better than what got you out of riding the bus back in the 90s and 80s. Wear a paper bag over your head and enjoy the ride!
The Mirage is fine! It does what it says it does: inexpensive transportation.
That trunk is unforgivably hideous, but the hatchback is fine! It’s so lightweight that it’s actually fun to toss around, too. I had one as a rental and I don’t think I turned a single corner on all four wheels (well, pre-concussion, anyway—it was on THAT weekend).
Let’s be real Stef, we know you gave the presentation that made them decide to turn the Eclipse into a crossover. At the Pajero Trials the truth will be exposed.
{ sharpens prison shank made of broken 944 tensioner rod }
I get a lot of “I worry about you” based on what I’ll go to bat for and/or want. The biggest one is the Lancer, though. Boy oh boy, does everyone love to give me grief for the Lancer. I get asked why I haven’t replaced it yet, hear “that’s not an Evo, so it’s bad” too often, hear about the state of Mitsubishi at the moment (as if that’s my fault? I can’t defend that), and blah blah, blah blah blah. It’s a great car, though! It will probably outlive most of its doubters.
My previous answer probably would have been the Cayenne, but for better or for worse, the internet seems to have caught on that Cayenne is always the real answer.
I’m no auto journo like yourself, but I do get blank stares when I defend the Lancer’s poverty-stricken little brother, the Mirage. For what it is: ugly, ungainly, and badly proportioned, it’s also reliable and infinitely better than what got you out of riding the bus back in the 90s and 80s. Wear a paper bag over your head and enjoy the ride!
The Mirage is fine! It does what it says it does: inexpensive transportation.
That trunk is unforgivably hideous, but the hatchback is fine! It’s so lightweight that it’s actually fun to toss around, too. I had one as a rental and I don’t think I turned a single corner on all four wheels (well, pre-concussion, anyway—it was on THAT weekend).
Let’s be real Stef, we know you gave the presentation that made them decide to turn the Eclipse into a crossover. At the Pajero Trials the truth will be exposed.
{ sharpens prison shank made of broken 944 tensioner rod }
Chrysler’s K-cars and all of their derivatives. Except for any one of them that were built with the Mitsubishi 3.0 V6 and/or the Chrysler 4-speed (electronically-controlled) automatic.
Give me any of the 2.2/2.5 engines (NA, turbo, etc.) with either the 3-speed auto, 4-speed manual, or 5-speed Getrag.
**Honorable mention for the Chrysler-Maserati with the Maserati-developed DOHC head on a Chrysler 2.2L turbo. The only Q worth owning.
Chrysler’s K-cars and all of their derivatives. Except for any one of them that were built with the Mitsubishi 3.0 V6 and/or the Chrysler 4-speed (electronically-controlled) automatic.
Give me any of the 2.2/2.5 engines (NA, turbo, etc.) with either the 3-speed auto, 4-speed manual, or 5-speed Getrag.
**Honorable mention for the Chrysler-Maserati with the Maserati-developed DOHC head on a Chrysler 2.2L turbo. The only Q worth owning.
The RX-7, really the rotary motor. Always hearing “Why do you like an unreliable motor that gets horrible gas mileage and has no torque?” The sound, the simplicity, the F1 level redline capabilities. I just love them. The argument that their reliability can be addressed with help from the aftermarket and knowledge and even besides that, the fact you can tear one down and rebuild it so easily always just gets dismissed.
It’s a real bummer how expensive they have become. I got my first JDM 13B turbo motor and trans for $1500 and rebuild with porting, upgraded seals, dowels, etc cost an additional $1500. Recently I looked around for another 13B-T just to play around with and swaps are $5k now. I don’t care what anyone says, they’re awesome.
Someone should make aftermarket rotary engines to OEM (or better) spec.
The RX-7, really the rotary motor. Always hearing “Why do you like an unreliable motor that gets horrible gas mileage and has no torque?” The sound, the simplicity, the F1 level redline capabilities. I just love them. The argument that their reliability can be addressed with help from the aftermarket and knowledge and even besides that, the fact you can tear one down and rebuild it so easily always just gets dismissed.
It’s a real bummer how expensive they have become. I got my first JDM 13B turbo motor and trans for $1500 and rebuild with porting, upgraded seals, dowels, etc cost an additional $1500. Recently I looked around for another 13B-T just to play around with and swaps are $5k now. I don’t care what anyone says, they’re awesome.
Someone should make aftermarket rotary engines to OEM (or better) spec.
I will defend the base non-turbo Fiat 500 to my death. I had one for 12 years and I miss it to this day. It was hands down the most fun car I’ve ever owned. I don’t need no stinkin’ Abarth
My wife and I still have her 2012 Sport 5-speed. Zero issues except for a broken exterior door handle we had fixed. It’s a perfect little car, it’s paid for, and she’ll never let me sell it.
Mine wasn’t even a 5 speed and I still stand by how fun it was.
The automatic wasn’t exactly plan A, but despite the extra $1,000 option cost, it was the cheapest, most heavily discounted 500 on the lot at the time, so I took it and I have no regrets.
I’ve had a few issues and almost all of them were fixed by recalls or warranty work
I ended up dumping it after discovering it was burning coolant at 108k
I will defend the base non-turbo Fiat 500 to my death. I had one for 12 years and I miss it to this day. It was hands down the most fun car I’ve ever owned. I don’t need no stinkin’ Abarth
My wife and I still have her 2012 Sport 5-speed. Zero issues except for a broken exterior door handle we had fixed. It’s a perfect little car, it’s paid for, and she’ll never let me sell it.
Mine wasn’t even a 5 speed and I still stand by how fun it was.
The automatic wasn’t exactly plan A, but despite the extra $1,000 option cost, it was the cheapest, most heavily discounted 500 on the lot at the time, so I took it and I have no regrets.
I’ve had a few issues and almost all of them were fixed by recalls or warranty work
I ended up dumping it after discovering it was burning coolant at 108k
I would say the chevy chevette and the nova
I would say the chevy chevette and the nova
I find myself defending a lot of 80s and 90s GM designs. Not the engineering. Not the quality. Not the performance (with exceptions). The styling.
GM made some interesting looking cars back in the day that, had they been engineered better, made of higher quality materials, and assembled with a bit more care, would be looked at differently today.
I find myself defending a lot of 80s and 90s GM designs. Not the engineering. Not the quality. Not the performance (with exceptions). The styling.
GM made some interesting looking cars back in the day that, had they been engineered better, made of higher quality materials, and assembled with a bit more care, would be looked at differently today.
Chevy Corvairs. They’re one of my dream cars, especially the two-year-only Lakewood wagon. I find them endlessly fascinating and it really grinds my gears that they still can’t break association with “Unsafe At Any Speed” and Ralph Nader.
Why, of all cars, did THIS have to be the sacrificial goat on the altar of safety? There was nothing wrong with it! Their supposed tendency to roll over has been debunked by many sources by now, including Hagerty using Ralph Nader’s own Corvair! Yeah, the dude only used that car as the example in his book because he owned one, because it was a good affordable car. Why couldn’t he have owned a Ford Falcon or Chevy II instead, and let the one truly different and innovative American compact car thrive without the burden of a false reputation for dangerous handling characteristics?
Even just recently I was at a car show where someone brought a Corvair, and someone remarked “too bad they would flip over real easy,” which prompted me to go on a rant about how they’re actually fine and were no easier to roll over than regular American cars of the era, and furthermore actually had very good handling.
So yeah, I feel a strangely powerful compulsion to defend Chevy Corvairs and hope to someday have one in the driveway. The American 911 calls to me.
I also feel a need to defend the Ford Pinto, the Suzuki Samurai, the Pontiac Sprint Six cars, the Subaru 360, the Trabant, the PT Cruiser, the AMC Gremlin and Pacer, the Plymouth Cricket, and all generations of Ford Thunderbird because screw it I love them all. Also various uncool/lesser-known platform mates of cool and sought-after cars, which I’m a sucker for (I really wanna import all the Alfa Romeo bits that could potentially be transferred to a Chrysler 200).
I always wonder what kind of future the Corvair could have had. Would it have fallen victim to the Malaise era or would GM have beaten Porsche to the rear-engined performance car niche?
It certainly would’ve lost a bit of horsepower during the Malaise era, but otherwise I think it would’ve thrived honestly. It was designed from the get go to be an economy car, and just happened to also be fairly sporty and fun to drive. It could’ve been Chevy’s 1970s compact car instead of the Vega, and given them a leg up on the competition as the fuel crisis wouldn’t have caught them so unprepared.
While it was never a direct Porsche competitor despite racing in a few series, I imagine a few special sporty versions would get made over the years to sort of compete with Porsche, so long as they don’t end up faster than the Corvette.
Speaking of the Corvette though, if Chevy had kept the Corvair’s transaxle in production, we could’ve had a mid-engine Corvette much sooner…
The closest thing we ever got to a Corvair successor was the Chevy Monza, which was named as such because Chevy still had the rights to the Monza name from the Corvair Monza. So if the Corvair had survived into the 70s and 80s, I imagine it could’ve looked quite a lot like the Chevy Monza, as both were semi-sporty economy cars. The aerodynamics of the Monza body would’ve complemented the Corvair platform’s fuel economy quite nicely.
If it were to somehow survive into the 90s, I imagine it would’ve had to follow the same path as Porsche eventually and switch to a water-cooled engine, but still could’ve made for a versatile and compelling package. The Corvair was always available in multiple body styles, which is its advantage against the 911. Where else will you find a rear-engined sedan or station wagon? That layout but modernized would’ve been very interesting to see.
The Corvair was also one of Chevy’s early experiments with electrification, so the GM EV1 could’ve potentially been a Corvair variant instead. If they’d kept the EV1 drivetrain FWD, an electrified 90s Corvair could’ve even kept the gas engine in the back and have been an early hybrid.