Laying wide awake thinking about every cringe thing I said and did in the previous eighteen-or-so hours is my standard sleep ritual, and at the top of today’s Greatest Hits will be my stunning display of ding-dongery in today’s Slack huddle with The Team, including David Tracy, Torch, and the formidable (but affable!) Matt Hardigree, who suggested today’s Autopian Asks query.
I knew it was a good topic as soon as he offered it, but like a dope, I asked if we were sure there would be enough place-named cars. The cringe. My pea-brain only served up like three car names that were obviously (to me) titled after places, and one of them was the Pontiac Parisienne only because Jason wrote about it not long ago (that’s the story above). Thankfully, the gang was gracious enough not to ask if I was a moron [Editor’s Note: You’re great, Pete. So far from a moron it’s absurd! -DT], and rattled off enough place-named-cars to fill a Santa’s-list scroll if one was feeling old-timey enough to write them all down. For example:
… as well as Chevys Colorado, Tahoe, and Monte Carlo; Hyundais Rio… and a bunch more that we know but don’t want to spoil. Which of these, or the countless others you can no doubt think of, is the least or most suitably-designed to bear the mantle of its place name? The Autopian Asks!
Images: top shot, GM and Etsy seller; Buick Lucerne via GM; Lucerne, France by Slav Yakounin/Wikimedia; Kia Telluride via Kia; Telluride, Colorado by John Fowler/Wikimedia
i ThOuGhT eUrOpE wAs A cOuNtRy ????
Lucerne/Luzern is as much France as New York City is Mexico.
GMC Yukon? Denali?
Lucerne is in Switzerland. I was born there
Cadillac Seville
You mean the guy who lived with the Chipmunks?
Nobodys tought about car named after the Nurburgring, the Lexus LFA Nurburgring for example.
Thinking about track town named car : Bentley Mulsanne or Ferrari F40 Le Mans comes to mind but I’m sure there’s a lot more.
Porsche Cayenne, but I really don’t think they were thinking of the city when naming it
The Seat Ibiza is a joyless little hatchbox that, ironically, is a staple of rental fleets throughout the Balearic islands of which Ibiza is the most joyful.
Not exactly on-topic, but this article made me think of this Chrysler ad:
https://youtu.be/LuaIJGJNbzo
Lucerne is in Switzerland btw.
Where Bob Lutz was born.
That would be Zürich.
And not even in the french speaking part
Opel Ascona (like my C) is not so much the lakeside Swiss resort it should be …
Chevrolet Suburban. It’s like the epitome of the suburbs. Soccer moms, maybe the occasional boat towing, poorly parked in massive parking spaces…
Cadillac Calais: It’s a big barge, so I guess it would dock just fine in a northern french ferry port.
Volvo Amazon: Well it’s very beautiful, like the mythical female warriors, but it’s not a vehicle I would take near that south american river. That’s more a job for the Volvo C303!
Anything with the Capri name. Even the best of them – the Mercury ones from the early ’70’s – did not in any way, shape, or form evoke an exotic Mediterranean island.
The British Ford Capri though, handsome sporty car, especially the RS!
Are we including racetrack-named cars? Then I’d like to offer up the Willys Interlagos. Like the racetrack, it was made in Brazil, only for rich people, and based on a French design, as the car is a license-built Alpine 108 and the track was partially inspired by Montholy, in France.
How am I the first person to mention the AMC Matador Barcelona? Which looks nothing like the Catalan coast …
Aspen. Dodge Aspen. WTF?
Most: Chrysler New Yorker [ doesn’t matter the era, the car and the state changed the same over time. ]
Least: Kia Sedona; you’d be hard-pressed to find one capable of going up any ski slopes.
I agree 100% about the New Yorker…
However my Father in law’s Sedona, got us to Sedona, just fine..
Well, color me shocked.
Since this piece could probably be renamed Pontiac Pthursdays…
I nominate the Pontiac Acadian. A Canada specific version of the Chevette, named after a peoples who were partially banished from Canada. A car that should have been banished from existence, so I guess in this case an appropriate name.
Acadian = root word of “Cajun.” Justin Wilson tells the story better and funnier than anyone: https://youtu.be/q1TPOCo60BE
Kudos for bringing up Justin Wilson!
How about the VW T5 or T6 California, a van inspired and perfect for, but not at all available in, the state that created beach camper vans?
On the “most” side, the Hyundai Santa Cruz, for being extremely weird, unorthodox, somewhat impractical and with a style of its own, assuming this is named after Santa Cruz, CA.