Here’s the thing about being in style: it never lasts. It doesn’t matter if it’s cars or clothes, furniture or footwear, music or mustaches (I had trouble thinking of an m-thing): as soon as everyone agrees on what’s totally cool, that’s a pretty good indicator those cool things are rapidly approaching their expiration date. One minute you’re the guy with his finger on the pulse, the next you’re throwing your parachute pants in the trash and crying in your room, face buried in a beanbag chair.
REALLY did the Cordoba dirty, oof 😬 pic.twitter.com/81I1xbTBsM
— The Autopian (@the_autopian) February 1, 2023
Now, for cars, styling trends can be particularly perilous. These are major purchases after all, so manufacturers are keen to make sure the new models look super fresh and modernly-styled, and naturally we consumers want our new cars to look all futuristic and rad and whatnot. But looking new and looking good don’t always go hand-in-hand, and time can be very unkind to what was once cutting edge. For example, remember when rectangular headlights were an absolute must-have? Round headlights were for squares, ironically. Heck, even motorcycles were wearing rectangular headlights. Gross.
Today, car-styling trends are more diverse than ever. Some are tired but still innocuous (I can’t get mad at floating roofs), others were dubious when they first arrived and have only gotten dubiouser ever since. Plastic cladding, I’m looking at you. Literally, right now. I’m sorry, Subaru Crosstrek Wilderness, you look like a frickin’ sneaker. And what is the deal with giant, hideous grilles on trucks and SUVs? Sorry if you read that in a Seinfeld voice. They’re like parodies of alpha-toughness. Don’t get me started on phony cheek-intakes so large that they would look at home on an A-7 Corsair. Especially when they’re fake, I mean come on. I could go on.
And so, The Autopian Asks: what are three styling trends, past or present, that you would select erase from history? To the comments!
Top graphic image credits: Subaru Crosstrek/Subaru; 1959 Cadillac Coupe Deville by That Hartford Guy/Wikimedia Commons; Lexus LX600/Lexus; Cylon Warrior by Klapi/Wikimedia Commons
SUV’s in general… sorry, but they all just look like morbidly obese hatchbacks
1) R56
2) F56
3) whatever the newest one is
1) Floating C-pillar
2) Floating C-pillar
3) Floating C-pillar
Why?
It’s a bad and lazy design choice, most of the time improperly used. In theory, it could carry a roof that’s different in color to the body. In practice, most automakers just put a black squiggle in between the same color body and roof, ruining the design opportunity with something that looks (subjectively) worse than just having the whole C-pillar the same color. I’d hate it less if automakers did it well, but they don’t.
Smaller windows
Larger pillars
Entertainment screens.
Fake exhausts
Fake windows
Those fuckin’ headlamps that wrapped over the top of the fenders. Now they are all yellowed and moldy.
1: Big fake grilles. Grilles that are functionally large are OK if not overstyled.
2: “Shark fin” beltlines especially when accompanied by a black roof.
3: Small brake lights (especially when there are large lenses but only a small section illuminates. Looking at you current RAV4, Sienna, and certain Teslas), with a note that brake lights should be red, and turn signals should be amber. Second note: main lights should be above the bumper; Fog lights or extra reverse lights below the bumper are good, and lights in the bumper (which is a collision device) are forbidden (cough cough Kia and Hyundai cough).
The three that make me half cringe half snicker every time.
•Bunker beltlines.
•Whale tail spoilers (less prevalent these days)
•Huge rims with low profile tires on trucks or SUVs
This is easy:
It’s easier to say 3 things I like about today’s cars/trucks.
I’ll have to get back to you on that.
1: The Miata still exists.
2: RWD-based vehicles are making a comeback.
3: Manual transmissions aren’t dead.
-Plastic = rugged
-Turn signals on lower bumper on hatch/suvs
-“Coupe” back SUVs
Feels like a lot of people aren’t talking about styling trends so much, just complaining about overall trends more.
I don’t mind all the plastic cladding so much, I think with how cars look otherwise, there’d be too many expanses of body panels and cars would tend to look almost blobby. Call it indifference, maybe. I also feel like the fading issue has improved, if I see a ~15 year old CR-V the paint is in worse shape than the cladding (although Honda paint is not really a fair judgement, but still, as far as the plastic itself).
Mine:
Dark gray/black wheels. Paint the pockets, that’s fine, but designing a wheel and painting it so you can’t see seems to defeat the purpose, and makes it look cheaper to me, not sportier.
Bumper mount brake/turn signals – I’ll count that as styling since several cars have space for these functions on the actual higher light assembly. (Hyundai/Kia, ahem.)
Fender vents – that’s quieted down some but for a while there in the late 2000s/early 2010s, you had vehicles left and right with fake vents that didn’t really need to break up the space and didn’t even serve as a spot for a turn signal or badge or something.
High belt lines (small windows)
Altezza taillights
Giant predator grills
What’s wrong with “Altezza-style” lights? They’re better than blacked-out or bumper-mounted tails.
Stage 3 cancer is better than stage 4. That doesn’t mean it’s good.
Wrangler angry eyes grills.
I gotta admit, they are useful for spotting angry people. And boy, there were a ton of them when I lived in the south…
The prolapsed bumper/diffuser thing. I’m looking at you Supra and BMW. They have a back end that extrudes ever smaller versions of bumpers and diffusers ending in exhaust. This is not “sporty”.
Useless pill box windows
Cosplay army/cowboy/labourer/baddie/adventure seeker mall crawlers and commuters
“Cool mom” SUVs
Black plastic cladding always has and always will look ugly, and it will turn gray and worn out looking in a few short years and look uglier still. It doesn’t “protect your paint” because the unpainted plastic scratches easier than painted body panels do, and it looks even worse when it does scratch. It doesn’t look “rugged”, it looks cheap.
Primary list:
Secondary list:
What’s wrong with sunroofs? With proper drainage (when closed) they can be a great way to vent heat out of a vehicle in the summer.
Nothing wrong with them, it’s the fact that they are forced upon you in trim packages. ex: I need Navigation but why do I have to pay $5000 for a sun roof to get it?
He has a point.
4-door pickups with tiny vestigial beds
Oversized rims + tires with no sidewall
Turn signals over headlamps
Depends on how the signal is implemented. The original VW beetle and the Mercedes Galandewagen both have turn signals above the headlamp but they’re more functional and visible by being up higher.
Touchscreens, not the little ones but the tombstones the size of a TV (make buttons you cheap bastard auto makers) Subscription based extras…(offer them and I will never buy your brand again) ok that wasn’t design but I’m angry. Little tiny pieces of glass inserted into MASSIVE blind spot creating A pillars. And every car and truck sold by GM since 1986.
Crossovers, pickup trucks that require a deployable staircase to reach into the bed, touchscreens
honorable mention: black wheels
VAG, Stellantis, and Nissan.
Am I doing this right?
I’d substitute BMW for Stellantis for style issues, but you have three of the top 5 offenders for poor reliability/dependability.
1) overlarge wheels
2) squashy-back SUVs
3) headlights that fail to pop up
The Lexus grille and its kin. It’s gotten completely out of hand and needs to stop.
Painted bumpers
Plastic cladding and trim (including metal painted plastic)
Fake vents and scoops (also made of more plastic)